I've had, for the past week, a deep melancholy set over me and I just cannot shake it. Do you know what I mean? it's nothing specific, just an aching sadness (it really does seem aching) that pervades everything I've done for the past week.
There are things wrong in my life, I know, but every body has problems. I don't know what it is but it maybe mourning for a lost past, the happy things and also all the things I could have done but didn't. Maybe because all of the people I'm meeting at the minute are younger than me, perhaps I long to be their age again and to do life right like they are doing- or to get to know them without the unspoken acknowledgement that I'm too old to be an undergraduate meeting other undergraduates.
Or maybe I'm lost as to what the future holds; I can't see anything to be hopeful about, to look forward to, just losing my friends one by one as we all continue to grow up and go our separate ways.
Such an aching sadness I could curl into a ball and cry
Also our house was burgled
nothing of mine was taken but just don't feel safe here anymore
I'm really sorry to unburden this here, I just needed to get it out in the open