The Sound of Drums - A British Hearts of Iron II AAR

Third-ing that!

Pretty please?

Carried.

* Pushes wine glass away in disgust *

Could we get a move on old man, or do we wait for the bloody Californians to produce a drinkable red before we liberate Bordeaux!

I assumed you drank gin and tonics actually....

He may have gone on a secret trip to Washington, in order to prostitu, er, promote the cause to the Yanks in the hope of getting some aid.

As sec of coctails I have to keep a broad church.

If he went all the way to Washington that would explain a lot.

The Sound of Drums - A British Hearts of Iron II AAR
Part Fifty-One​

19th September 1940

The Cabinet of Doom met for its usual Thursday conference, and as usual its members were focusing on anything but the current war situation. The Prime Minister sat slumped in his chair at the head of the table, rather exasperated. He had opened this session with what he had hoped would be a well-received report on the bombing of Berlin and the upcoming air-campaign, only for the Cabinet to immediately launch an inquiry into British industrial potential and the current production line.

That debate had begun over two hours ago, and it seemed to the Prime Minister that his Cabinet members were more than happy to argue among themselves without any input from him. Disappointment set in, and he sat down looking over what went wrong with his report, before contenting himself with twiddling his moustache. Hadn’t he ordered tea from Volum twenty minutes ago? Where was that blasted boy?



It was some time yet before the Prime Minister suddenly realised the sudden silence in the room, and that many of his Ministers were staring at him expectantly. Forgetting his moustache-fashioning, Kan sat up stiffly and looked around the table.

“Well what have you decided then?” asked Kan sharply. “Is there some munitions factory somewhere that we could squeeze some more production out of?”

It was Chancellor Yuri who answered first. “Prime Minister, we’re not talking about Britain’s industries. We’re wondering about the possibility of invading Persia.”

“Or Saudi Arabia.” Lord StevieJay piped in.

It took several seconds before Kan’ Sharuminar spoke, stunned as he was at the strange change in topic. Finally, he managed to speak one strained sentence: “What on earth for?”

“Well, for the oil,” answered Rapidveggie. “We also think Romania could be a potential target, what with the Ploesti oil-fields.”

“But what for?” the Prime Minister looked from cabinet member to cabinet member. “Oil is by far our largest commodity, and we’re still receiving more. Why would we want to go trampling around the Persian desert or the Balkans to gain more when we have plenty?”

“It’ll give us something to do until we launch our attack on Italy.” Aronnax pointed out. “We don’t want to leave our troops in Africa with nothing to do.”

“God no,” snorted Nodikus. “I receive telegrams from General PrinceScamp demanding new campaigns at least once a week.”

Kan was getting annoyed now. “We’ve already agreed that some of those troops shall be redeployed to the Far East and Norway, the rest used for garrison purposes or sent home for retraining. More importantly gentlemen, in case you haven‘t forgotten we don‘t control the Mediterranean. I haven‘t sent Admiral Cleric and the Grand Armada there for sight-seeing purposes, you know. If we want to launch an invasion of the underbelly of Europe as well as hold it we‘ll need full dominance over the sea.”

That kept them quiet for a while, the Prime Minister noted inwardly with quiet satisfaction. He was less impressed when he realised several of his ministers had freshly topped-up mugs of tea in front of them. Had he simply not noticed Volum refilling them, or had the tea-boy become so adept at lurking in the room without being spotted that the Prime Minister had simply missed him?


The emergency War Cabinet Room

“Well then, Prime Minister.” Yuri once again broke the silence. “The state of our industry?”

“Yes, good.” Finally something sensible to work with. “What are your conclusions, Chancellor?”

“Well, put simply we need more precision. Virtually everything that is produced for the war-effort is done so by contracting companies across Britain.” Yuri paused, thinking his next words carefully. “It’s not efficient enough, Prime Minister, we must assume more direct control over these companies. It is the simplest way of making sure we have the equipment we need, when we need it.”

“Nationalisation?” The Prime Minister grinned. “It’s hardly going to endear the government in these trying times.”

“It would only be a temporary measure, of course.” Yuri said, handing the Prime Minister his papers concerning the matter. “No different to our control of regions such as Libya until after the war.”

“I see. I would assume such control would fall under your own office?”

“As Chancellor and director of industries I naturally assumed-”

“Quite right.” Kan interrupted. “I hardly want the extra paperwork, and so far your direction has helped the troops more than any factory-chief sitting waiting for a cheque before beginning weapon production. I’ll need a day to check through your report here, but consider your proposal accepted.”

Delighted, Yuri sat back in his chair and began scribbling notes into the book in front of him. In the meantime, and having decided that his most vocal voice of discontent was taken care of, the Prime Minister smiled and clapped his hands on the table in front of him.

“Now then, is there anything else before we end this session?”

“Japan sir,” Sheep21 piped up. “You’ve been promising a report for several months now, all we’ve had is the ramblings of our Minister of Silly Walks.”

“Oh yes, let me see.” In all honesty, Kan had no report for Japan - another casualty of his focus on Europe. But the mention of SuperBeaverInc did allow a change of subject that could distract the cabinet members a while. “I am pleased to announce his immediate appointment to-”

But his voice was immediately cut off by the rest of his cabinet. Voices for and against immediate action against the aggressive Far East nation were raised, and yet another debate began that forced Kan to slump back into his chair. As questions were raised towards the leader of Britain, a quiet voice from a certain tea-boy asked the Prime Minister if he would like a drink.

“I’ll have what he’s having.” Kan said, pointing at GinandTonic.

Game Effects: United Kingdom moves +1 towards Central Planning. Yuri2356 has a more efficient say in our production lines.

A more prose-based piece here, something I'm intending to practice at in the future, though maybe not with this AAR. I'm dreadfully out of practice, so any comments are welcome.

Awesomely hilarious xD

Now for a game update?

Actually very realistic.
Reminds me a lot of daily staff meetings from when I worked at Walmart, constantly going off on tangents.

[Meanwhile, at Kings Cross Station.]

Ah, another good day beside the line, watching the trains of the glorious LNE...wait, what the - WHAT THE HELL IS THIS WD RUBBISH!

[Thinks for a moment.]

YUUUUUUUUUUUUUURIIIIIIII!


OK, I'm just kidding. Just letting you know I'm alive, and asking of the state of our aircraft research.

Kan' Sharuminar said:

Game Effects: United Kingdom moves +1 towards Central Planning. Yuri2356 has a more efficient say in our production lines.

A more prose-based piece here, something I'm intending to practice at in the future, though maybe not with this AAR. I'm dreadfully out of practice, so any comments are welcome.

Click to expand...

While doing posts like that last every now and again is fine, overall I strongly prefer
your normal style; i.e. more game oriented.

I like a good solid mix of both.

PrinceScamp said:

I like a good solid mix of both.

Click to expand...

I agree.

OOC: Whatever is expedient is best, I know there have been times I haven't bothered to mention something in an AAR since I didn't feel like working it into the story, It comes to bite you in the arse later on when you have to explain a fact that everyone should have known.

Having a little factoid is a better system than that indeed

IC: No blood for oil, blood for India

Very amusing Kan. I liked the last line.

No need to be afraid of the word 'said' though.

Kan' Sharuminar said:

“But what for?” the Prime Minister looked from cabinet member to cabinet member. “Oil is by far our largest commodity, and we’re still receiving more. Why would we want to go trampling around the Persian desert or the Balkans to gain more when we have plenty?”

Click to expand...

And what we've in abundance, our enemies are not so blessed with. Modern war is vehicular war. Hitler knows this quite acutely, and his successes up to this point have been through the speed and strength of armour. If we deny him potential oil-bearing allies (which the Balkans may provide should he turn his attention eastwards) he would be unable to efficiently sustain the heart and soul of his precious war machine. From there, strikes on Germany's major energy sources would do a fair deal more than just dimming the lights.

In other news, I proudly accept my newly expanded duties and shall use them to better equip the empire for it's inevitable triumph against all who oppose it, and not to force various companies to reinstate product lines from the thirties that I really liked. No sir, none of that at all.

PrinceScamp said:

Awesomely hilarious xD

Now for a game update?

Click to expand...

You technically got one. I played a whole five days of the game and nothing happened.

Oh all right, I'll do a proper one soon enough.

nodikus said:

Actually very realistic.
Reminds me a lot of daily staff meetings from when I worked at Walmart, constantly going off on tangents.

Click to expand...

The Cabinet of Doom being similar to Walmart is rather horrifying

Serutan said:

While doing posts like that last every now and again is fine, overall I strongly prefer
your normal style; i.e. more game oriented.

Click to expand...

That's my intention. These will only appear fleetingly. As an aside, writing in this style was supposed to be used for To The Last Man, but it turned into historical-esque writing as well.

Captain2 said:

OOC: Whatever is expedient is best, I know there have been times I haven't bothered to mention something in an AAR since I didn't feel like working it into the story, It comes to bite you in the arse later on when you have to explain a fact that everyone should have known.

Having a little factoid is a better system than that indeed

Click to expand...

The little Game Effects Post will still only contain the details of what has been written in that update, so there's every chance I'll still forget to mention something.

I think the most recent casualty of that was Romania, who I fully intended to devote a large update to their dealings with the Russians, Germans, then finally entering the war on the Allied side. Whups.

Darth_Pugwash said:

Very amusing Kan. I liked the last line.

No need to be afraid of the word 'said' though.

Click to expand...

I noticed that myself, but only after posting. Every time I wrote the word I kept thinking I had used it before and changed it accordingly. As a result 'said' is only in there, what, twice?

Yuri2356 said:

And what we've in abundance, our enemies are not so blessed with. Modern war is vehicular war. Hitler knows this quite acutely, and his successes up to this point have been through the speed and strength of armour. If we deny him potential oil-bearing allies (which the Balkans may provide should he turn his attention eastwards) he would be unable to efficiently sustain the heart and soul of his precious war machine. From there, strikes on Germany's major energy sources would do a fair deal more than just dimming the lights.

Click to expand...

A very good point. I don't think Romania will be able to supply his armies with enough oil though, particularly if we begin a bombing campaign there. Essentially he'll have to strike for the Caucasus, and that would require an invasion of Russia.


Thanks for the comments all. Very encouraging

Too bad we're not going to be able to do squat for them right now. Although perhaps Stalin
will decide that preemptive measures are necessary when Hitler invades.

(OOC - i.e. the BFC will be triggered by a German invasion of Romania)

Kan' Sharuminar said:

You technically got one. I played a whole five days of the game and nothing happened.

Oh all right, I'll do a proper one soon enough.

Click to expand...

Squeee!

I think the most recent casualty of that was Romania, who I fully intended to devote a large update to their dealings with the Russians, Germans, then finally entering the war on the Allied side. Whups.

Click to expand...

Lolwut?

A very good point. I don't think Romania will be able to supply his armies with enough oil though, particularly if we begin a bombing campaign there. Essentially he'll have to strike for the Caucasus, and that would require an invasion of Russia.

Click to expand...

Excellent.