A Joke that always gets a laugh! More please!

[Ian Beale]

Reasonably rude but NO worse than some of the other jokes.

A parish gets a new vicar. The Vicar eager to impress his boss decides to try and smarten up the vicarage. He planted flowers and cut the grass and thought, i know, i'll call a window cleaner, good grief they could do with a good clean. Anyway the window cleaner came and started to do the upstairs windows and saw the vicar pleasuring himself in his bedroom. After the window cleaner had finished the vicar asked him how much he owed him, and was taken aback when he was told it was £500. When he asked why it was so expensive so the window cleaner told him he had seen what the vicar was doing in his bedroom! The vicar paid up and wondered how he'd explain the cost to the bishop. Anyway the Bishop arrived and was extremely impressed with how tidy everything was. He was especially impressed with the windows and asked him how he was able to clean them without specialist equipment. The Vicar then admitted that he'd got a window cleaner to do them for him. The Bishop gave a little tut and said, "well he's done a good job, how much did it cost?" To which the Vicar replied, "£500". "£500" said an astonished Bishop, "huh- he must have seen you coming!"

Everytime i've told this people have found it very, very amusing!

 

[Achinz]

A compliment by addition - a similar one on cost and no much ruder.

At the height of the recent recession, a husband is desperate to save money. He tells his wife to learn to cook better. "That'll save on restaurants." She must learn to iron his shirts 'to save on the ironing lady'. She'll need to clean the house properly, 'to save on the cleaning lady'.

And she said, 'Why don't you learn how to do your job in the bedroom better, so I can get rid of the gardener?'

 

[Ian Beale]

Surely there must be more jokes that always get a good reception! Too often on this forum i think i miss superb jokes because there are so many (to me anyway!) posts/threads which aren't worth looking at (your probably thinking the same about this one-lol), so i don't always look at them all. But jokes that always get a laugh should be together!

 

[Achinz]

Agreed. There definitely seems to be a minority of folks here who like jokes based on word-play. My earlier attempts fizzled too. I surmise a lot are more tuned to pictures than words as such.