So theoretically let’s say two people are playing the same version of VP, they should both experience the problem of crashing if there were memory allocation problems?
When they both reach the same amount of things on the map yes.
This is why lategame (diety in particular) large and huge maps are an issue.
And its not limited to VP mod, I watched a lot of Marbozir when he played BNW civ5 on youtube and it is definitely an issue in unmodded as well.