Kim Jong Il, Supreme and eternal leader of North Korea! (...in earth18civs)

[MaxWar]

Hey I just found the ultimate resource regarding the cartoons I introduced earlier: A whole YouTube channel devoted to them and their translation.
Visit DPRKsquirrels now!! Because G.I. Joe has nothing on commie squirrels!

http://www.youtube.com/user/dprksquirrels

 

[Civ'ed]

right....
we should really start writing an AAR now, shouldn't we, MaxWar?
*cough*

 

[MaxWar]

Hahaha, dont worry, ill begin it very soon. In the meantime it went just like i had planned, 3 pages of DPRK random talk

edit : just had to get u in the mood a little. Will start the game this evening. Promised

 

[Civ'ed]

Right.
*starts civ to get an update to the mod test out*

 

[MaxWar]

Fiew! that was a pretty intense 3500 years! Ill go eat, relax a bit then i start writing

 

[MaxWar]

It begins...​

Kim Jong-il, Supreme and Eternal leader of North Korea!​

... in earth18civs...​

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Prologue​

Almost immediately after the staggering pain erupted in his chest, Kim Jong-il's world turned into darkness and confusion. For an instant he thought he still heard the panicked voices around him, they all seemed so afraid... Then he was alone. Should he be afraid too? What was happening to him? It was all so confusing... Was it the end? Was he dying? His thoughts were spiraling into an ever descending maelstrom of confusion until eventually, his mind was utterly drowned in pitch black nothingness...

Kim Jong-il was dead.

He woke up in a start. He was in the darkness. The ground where he lay was smooth and hard. It felt like polished rock but it was strangely neither warm nor cool. The silence was absolute.
The confusion receded and he began to wonder what had happened. He focused on reconstructing the events. All he really remembered was the sudden pain and the inexorable weakness that followed. Did the train get attacked? Was he killed in a raid? No... the pain came from within... Was he dreaming now? Somehow it did not feel like a dream, his thoughts were too vivid, too clear. Was he dead? Was this what awaited him after death? A blank floor and an infinity of nothingness...? He was surely dead, but it did not matter. What mattered was that his beloved motherland was now alone. Orphaned from his guidance, how could the people survive without him? How could they continue without his caring hand to steer them? My son... Kim Jong-un... Will he be ready? He was not sure... Suddenly he felt the staggering weight of deep sorrow and loss fall upon him. In every fibers of his heart he could feel his country mourn for him. The tragedy was almost unbearable... The pain was even worse than the one he felt while dying...

Then the light appeared. It was bright and warm, but not blinding. It was also beautiful, glorious. It beckoned to him. It felt pure and good. Then, coming from all directions at once, a familiar voice broke the silence.

"내 아들을 환영합니다!"

(Errr... Sorry about that. *Activating auto translator plugin*)

<Kim Jong-il>Father! Is that you?
<Voice> Yes son.
<Kim Jong-il> Father! Your plesence gives me so much happiness! I was so ronery here in this dalkness!

(Errr... Sorry about that. *Activating automatic R<->L Inverter plugin.*)

<Kim Il Sung's Voice> Fear no more little Kim. You have passed away from the world of the livings. But your Immortal soul lives on and has been transported to the antechamber of eternal heroes.
<Kim Jong-il> What does this mean father?
<Kim Il Sung's Voice> It means you have lived well and did great things in the world of the mortals, otherwise you would not have reached this glorious place.
<Kim Jong-il> But I worry so much about our motherland... Is Kim Jong-un ready for all the responsibilities?
<Kim Il Sung's Voice> Do not worry about him. He will do his best, as you did... And you have even more important duties to attend to here.
<Kim Jong-il> But I cannot help it father! I hold the motherland in my heart and I will always care for her as I care for my own kin!
<Kim Il Sung's Voice> I understand you my son, I feel the same. But be reassured that from here, I will help Kim Jong-un. As i have helped you little Kim...
<Kim Il Sung's Voice> In this new world here, as in the world of mortals you just left, I am known as The Eternal Sun. I hold with me the wisdom of the ages.
<Kim Jong-il> Thank you father. But what about me now?
<The Eternal Sun of Mankind> In this world, you will lead our people once again. But this time you will be their eternal leader. From the beginning of the ages, until the end of times.
<The Eternal Sun of Mankind> Here, the enemies of the people will not have the unfair advantages they enjoyed in the world of mortals. The world of mortals was a mere test of strength. And you passed it. This world now is the real test, and all will start on equal ground. Only the true bests will come on top. The time has finally come for the motherland to shine with all the glory it deserves. And you shall lead her once more little Kim.

*Kim Jong-il wipes a tear*

<The Eternal Sun of Mankind>You know how to lead son, and you know our land. Now, go forth Little Kim, I will be watching over you.


The light of the eternal sun flared and engulfed little Kim in it's soothing embrace.
As the brightness surrounded him completely he felt himself being transported. After a while the caring presence gradually receded and Kim Jong-il finally opened his eyes. All around him, a lush and pristine landscape. The warm light of the morning sun caressed his neck. This was a place of utter beauty and breathtaking landscapes. It was also a place he knew well, the Motherland... Wild and still untamed...

To his sides, the firsts of their people. They were with him. Scouts, peasants and families. All of them ready to settle this pure and pristine land. They looked at him and he could read in their eyes that they would do everything he asked. This time, he swore to himself, nothing would stop the motherland...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Details ​

Custom map:: Earth18CivsNorthKorea ( See attachment )
Mod: North And South Korea mod : http://forums.civfanatics.com/downloads.php?do=file&id=10220
Difficulty: Monarch
Speed: Epic
Goal: GLORY OF THE MOTHERLAND!

Spoiler :

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 1 coming soon...​

 

[brandon.herren]

Make sure to convert to Free Speech and Universal Suffrage as soon as possible!

 

[Dumanios]

Don't forget State Property, the Communal civic!

 

[MaxWar]

Chapter 1​

Kim Jong-il had always dreamed of seeing Korea reunited; Under the rightful guidance of the people's republic of course. In this new world, Korea was finally one. It was not yet a People's republic though. For the time being the dear leader was barely more than the tribal chief of a group of primitives. But he knew the people would follow him no matter what and he would eventually herd them all under the red star of Socialism. He would succeed, after all, he brought with him an impressive CV.

Spoiler :

Their lost brothers of the south had formed little villages already. But here they had not yet been corrupted by the evil influence of the westerners and they would surely flock to him once he founded the glorious capital of Pyongyang.

Spoiler :

<Kim-Jong-il>Come forth my people! The time has come to build the foundations of our glorious empire!
<Settlers> Show us the path dear leader!
<Kim-Jong-il> This land is rich and fertile, but we will settle a little further to the south and I promise you my good people, this time we will never run out of food!
<Settlers> Be praised the leader for his wise guidance!

*Pyongyang is founded*

Spoiler :

<South Korean villagers> Uh? Who the hell are these guys?
<Kim Jong-il> Fear not my children! I came to guide you on the path of socialism!
*Kim Jong-il approaches*
<South Korean villagers> *backing off from the scary man*
<Kim Jong-il> *Grabs the nearest villager*
<Villagers> All praise the supreme leader for showing us the truth! Here's a map of the territory of the evil Japanese usurper, please protect us from them oh great leader!

*Tokugawa comes over*

<Tokugawa> Well, well, well. What do we have here? Korean piglets squeaking in my backyard?
<Villagers>
<Kim Jong-il> Back off you vile creature!
<Tokugawa> *shows a wicked smile full of sharp teeth* Its nice of you to take care of my future slaves, I appreciate. However I would advise you not to resist too much when my Japanese soldiers come for you. It might make them angry, and when they are angry they break stuff. I would not like to have damaged slaves.
<Kim Jong-il> No!! This time we will strike first! By the time we have our first boats, the people's army will cross and take you out!!
<Tokugawa> The.. People's army? Hahahaha... Well we shall see... Mwahahahahaha!!
<Kim Jong-il> Be gone! I cast you off to your cursed island horrible demon!!
*Kim Jong-il draws protective runes on the ground*
*Tokugawa leaves*

Spoiler :

[/IMG]

<Villagers> Oh dear leader! Thank you for protecting us from the evil demon
<Kim Jong-il> You people are real wussies but I will teach you how to fight then you will no longer fear anyone. Scouts!!
<Scouts> Please order us great leader!!
<Kim Jong-il> Go to the west and send to me the leaders of all the civilizations you meet.

This is how it all started. The scouts departed and went on an epic journey through the wilderness. In this tale of legends they would meet many peoples, fight and slay ferocious animals, sway natives to the dear leader and cover more land than anyone else in ages. Soon after they had departed, they met Qin Shi huang of the Chinese empire.

*Qin Shi Huang approaches*

<Qin Shi Huang> Greeting honorable Kim Jong-il. Let us hope there will always be peace and friendship between the Chinese empire and North Korea.
<Kim Jong-il> China!! Our dear economic partner! I am so happy to see you here. Together we shall show the world the power of the people's republics!
<Qin Shi Huang> Yes, but for now let us enjoy the nice weather. Do you want to share tea with me?
<Kim Jong-il> Of course!
<Qin Shi Huang>

Spoiler :

Then the fabled scouts met the fearsome Genghis Khan.

Spoiler :

*Genghis Khan approaches*

<Genghis Khan> Welcome oh leader of the north Korean empire. My horde beats your horde any day of the week. Shall we be friends or enemies?
<Kim Jong-il> Hello Genghis Khan. But i don't have a horde actually. I have something much more frightening. The people's army! And I gotta tell you, in a not so far future, the people's army will destroy your horde, lay waste on your land and slaughter your population. Nice to meet you btw.
<Genghis Khan> Not gonna happen!
<Kim Jong-il> How much do you wanna bet that I can punch you in the face right now using my invisible boxing gloves?
<Genghis Khan> Not gonna happen!
<Kim Jong-il> Watch! You see my fist... now you dont!
<Genghis Khan> Uh..?

*BAM!*

Spoiler :

<Genghis Khan> What the hell was that!
<Kim Jong-il> Look, I even have another one for my right fist.
<Genghis Khan> Uh..?

*TWACK!*

Spoiler :

<Genghis Khan> Are you crazy, stop it!!
<Kim Jong-il> Ok ok... Just wanted to show you. Anyway as I said, expect the people's army to lay waste on your empire in the following millenias, but in the meantime lets be good buddies ok?
<Genghis Khan> Ok!

*Genghis Khan leaves*

In the meantime...

Spoiler :

Then in their travels, our scouts met Cyrus Of Persia.

*Cyrus approaches*

<Cyrus> What is this!! North Korea? A civilization from the future!
<Kim Jong-il> Yes, we traveled back through time to make sure you stayed history.
<Cyrus> Haha! You funny man, well cya.

*Cyrus leaves*

Spoiler :

Then, continuing their travels, the scouts got wounded while fighting off scary wolves. Looking for a place to rest they came upon a small isolated village.

Spoiler :

<Scouts> Behold wild population! You are summoned in Pyongyang to be part of the most glorious nation to come!
<Villagers> But who are you guys? You want a banana?
*Scout grabs a nearby woman.*
<Villagers> Must join the people's republic now. Here, new technology for great leader. Bows... kill enemies.

Spoiler :

In the meantime, more food for the people.

Spoiler :

Then some long haired weirdo came over in Pyongyang claiming to be the leader of a grand nation and demanded to be escorted in the people's palace to see the great leader. Of course, since no one but the supreme leader is allowed in the people's palace the weirdo was beaten, thrown out of the city and made to wait in the countryside while Kim Jong-il was escorted with an official delegation and met him in the middle of a field.

Spoiler :

<Asoka> May peace and happiness go with you always, Kim Jong-il. I am Asoka of India.
<Kim Jong-il> I bid you welcome in this humble field Asoka. As you can see North Korea is in the higher spheres of agriculture.
*With an arm flourish, Kim Jong-il encompassed the farmland around him.*
<Asoka> ...
<Kim Jong-il> *cough* ... well?
<Asoka> ...
<Kim Jong-il> And may I ask you why you are Qin Shi's worst ennemy? Because Qin shi is my friend you know.
<Asoka> ...
<Kim Jong-il> So was that all you had to say?
<Asoka> ...

*Asoka leaves*

<Kim Jong-il> *Addressing nearby peasant* Do you think this man was high?
*peasant nods*

After this event, many turns passed by in peaceful growth. The ever-glorious city of Pyongyang had workers tending the fields. Some warriors and archers had been trained and the local authorities were now building a barrack when some dreadful and unexpected news reached Kim Jong-il...

Spoiler :

<Kim Jong-il> The Chinese Destroyed?! What happened, why?! Our only friends! Our eternal trade partners!! They did not even have the chance to become a people's republic!!! NOOOOO!!!!
*Kim falls on his knees*
"WHYYYYYYYyyyyyyyyyyyyy....!!"

This news changed something in Kim Jong-il. He realized that this new world was cruel and merciless. To face it, he would have to be equally cruel and merciless. It was the only way to survive. Pyongyang's farmland now being fully developed, the city switched to a war economy. The technology of bronze working was now fully mastered and the workers started chopping the forest to build mines in the rich northern mountain range.
But the Koreans did not have access to either copper or horses... They would have to make do with archers... Lots of archers... As soon as the first barrack-trained attack archers were ready for service, Kim Jong-il sent them on a mission to scout the former Chinese capital and try to gather intelligence about what had happened. The reality soon became all too clear...

Spoiler :

<Kim Jong-il> ASOKA!! THAT VILE TREACHEROUS WRETCH!! AAARRGH!!
<Kim Jong-il> I should have suspected... There was something obviously wrong with that man.
<Kim Jong-il> No.. Not a man, he was obviously not human... Yes that's... That's It! He must be an evil robot sent by the Americans to try to take down the flame of socialism! Why did I not realize this earlier! Forgive me father!!
<The Eternal Sun of Mankind> You are right little Kim. I can see that you finally realized the truth, but it is not too late.. Avenge you Comrades!!!

*Meanwhile in America*
<Roosevelt> MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
*Back in Korea*

<Kim Jong-il> I shall father... Fear not. We will take back the Chinese Motherland from the hands of those evil American Robots.
<Kim Jong-il> In the name of Lenin: CRUSADE!!!

...to be continued...

 

[Tycho]

Don't forget Police State!

 

[Dumanios]

I assume North Korea replace Spain or Greece?

No! Not China!

 

[MaxWar]

I assume North Korea replace Spain or Greece?

No! Not China!

Yeah, Imagine my surprise when i saw china get Roflstomped in 3000BC by I-dont-know-who. I was

And no, its neither Spain nor greece

 

[Jwitti]

I was playing Ad Infinitum's Earth 18 civs and while I was crushing everyone as Arabia I saw that the Chinese and Mongols died.... I later (aka five minutes ago) got a horseman to go see them and it was barbs.. in charge of Yue-Chi, Beijing, and Kakourum, a nice little barb empire

 

[Dumanios]

Then who was replaced by NK?

 

[MaxWar]

The french leaders were all in "The French are coming!!! ...to Earth 18 Civs'' And there was no one left to rule them. And i also though that removing them would clear Europe a little

 

[brandon.herren]

Great Update! That EVIL AMERICAN EMPIRE MUST BE DEFEATED!!!! That's the first time I've ever seen Indian conquer China, and first time I've ever seen an AI been defeated by non-barbs, before turn 40.

 

[Tycho]

*You are now being monitored by the DPRK*.

 

[MaxWar]

*You are now being monitored by the DPRK*.

 

[brandon.herren]

All hail Kim Il-sung!!!

 

[MaxWar]

*You are now being monitored by the DPRK*.

This thread is actually the 6th google search result for Kim Jong-il eternal .
It is on the 6th page google result for Kim jong Il supreme.
So i guess there's actually chances they are reading it. I just hope they like the story