More Redneck humour

[Tweedledum]

Admittedly this is a fairly old one, but still good:

Alabama Driving License Application

 

[philippe]

lol

 

[WickedSmurf]

Really charming that!

 

[trader/warrior]

looks perfectly normal to me

 

[Xi 12]

You sure that's not Kentucky?

 

[Point13]

why I OUGTHA! I'm from BAMA! (live in the best city in the state but okkk....

 

[SuperBeaverInc.]

Very funny.

Here is something I got in an e-mail long ago.


RED NECK PROFESSIONAL ENGINEERING EXAM

1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a
persimmon tree that will support a 10-pound possum.

2. Which of the following cars will rust out the
quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard?
66 Ford Fairlane, 69 Chevrolet Chevelle, 64 Pontiac
GTO.

3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a
capacity of 20 gallons of moonshine per hour, how
many car radiators are necessary to condense the
product?

4. A woodcutter has a chain saw that operates at
2700 rpm. The density of the pine trees in a plot to
be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres
in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. How
many Budweisers will it take to cut the trees?

5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented a
charge of R-12 simultaneously, what would be the
decrease in the ozone layer?

6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on
24-inch centers with a field rock foundation. The
span is 8 feet and the porch length is 16 feet. The
porch floor is 1-inch rough sawn pine. When the
porch collapses, how many hound dogs will be killed?

7. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a
hollow with an average slope of 15%. The man has 5
children. Can each of the children place a mobile
home on the man's land?

8. A 2-ton truck is overloaded and proceeding 900
yards down a steep grade on a secondary road at 45
mph. The brakes fail. Given the average traffic on
secondary roads, what are the chances that it will
strike a vehicle that has a muffler?

9. A natural gas compressor station operates a OSHA
Class 1, Division 2M, Hazardous Area.. The plant
employs 12 employees per shift. A gas warning is
issued at the beginning of 3rd shift. How many
cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during
the shift?

10. At a reduction in gene pool variability rate of
7.5% per generation, how long will it take a town
that has been bypassed by the interstate to breed a
country-western singer?

 

[RegentMan]

Funny!