warpus
In pork I trust
This day does not get much fanfare in North America I don't think, but it is an important day nevertheless. I remember when the International Women's Day wasn't really celebrated in Canada either, so maybe it's just a matter of time before these days get the attention they deserve.
This is the day when us men can reflect on the unique challenges, needs, responsibilities, and problems with our male gender. This is a complex subject, which I hope we can keep civil, much like I'd expect from a discussion centering around International Women's Day.
These are important subjects to discuss. Male suicide is out of control in many western countries and there remains a stigma for men to discuss these issues, as well as a lack of support services specifically for this purpose. Many men feel like they do not have anybody to turn to when they struggle with thoughts about suicide, so they just pull the trigger.. sort to speak.. It is incredibly depressing to see so many young and old men kill themselves every year, when in many cases some therapy or just somebody willing to listen would have been a great first step towards fixing the underlying issues, or at least preventing suicide as being a viable option in that person's mind.. With the economy in many western countries not really doing very well right now, and many people having employment issues and other related concerns, this also seems like a good time to bring up these issues here.
If anybody on here is ever feeling suicidal, or you just want somebody to talk to.. no matter what your gender, you can always message me. I am sitting at home pretty much 24/7 and am on chat services like discord, so if anything I would be willing to listen to your issues. I am not a trained psychologist in any sense of the word, but I do know that just talking can make a huge difference. So don't be shy, if you have problems feel free to send me a message. The worst that could happen is we become friends.
It is also important to remember the physical challenges men face - such as prostate cancer, which kills about 1 in 40 men in America. That's a crazy statistic and it's something men never talk about. Women are doing it right - look at how much attention and funding breast cancer has gotten over the years. It used to be a bit of a taboo subject as well, but over the decades women have educated themselves and now openly talk about this issue with each other. But us men, we do not like to talk about our testicles... So many men do not end up doing simple checkups that could easily save their lives. This has got to stop, this idea that you are "too manly" to cry or talk about your health issues or mental health issues. These gender roles have been a part of our society for a while, so it will take some time to get rid of them, but right now they are very in the way of us solving some of these issues.
What other problems do men face? Personally I have only ever experienced mild sexual harrassment, and after shutting it down the other person listened to my concerns and backed off. That was easy enough for me in that situation, but I know that many men just don't want to talk about being sexually harassed, about being raped, or about facing domestic violence at home from their partner (no matter the gender). There is still a lot of stigma for men to discuss these issues openly. We just don't do it, we push it under the rug and hope it goes away. We don't want our friends and family to know.
STOP
It's okay to talk about these issues. I am not sure how to really change the culture around all this, but we need to be able to openly discuss such issues. Our gender is "lucky" in that the vast majority of these sexual and domestic violence issues affects women, and not us. And that is important to note. Most of the time I don't have to worry about this stuff.. BUT IT STILL HAPPENS AND AFFECTS MANY MEN. The stigma surrounding discussing and reporting these problems needs to go away, but like I said that is not an easy battle. These things are deeply ingrained in our cultural psyche. They will not go away overnight.
And yes, this day should also be a reflection of how we can improve as a gender. You should never be judged by your gender, ever, but that does not mean that you can just ignore the historic injustices perpetrated by our gender either. These injustices must be on our mind, lest we forget about them. This day can't be used to compete with women over these issues. Their issues are in some ways similar to the issues we face, but we each have unique problems to deal with as well, and you can't forget that either.
So, tell me.. men of Civfanatics.. What does it mean to you to belong to the male gender? Do you like the associated gender stereotypes and so called gender roles? Do you think it's sexist when people tell you to "man up"? Do you wish you could cry without people judging you? Do you think it's possible for you, as a man, to both celebrate this day and your gender - while at the same time being retrospective about the historic problems our gender is wrapped up in?
This thread is not meant to be gender exclusive, much like I would not expect an International Women's Day thread to be exclusively for women. The best way to understand yourself is to change your point of view and attempt to see yourself from the outside - and since women exist outside of the male gender, they are in a unique position to critique us.. celebrate us.. and offer insights we otherwise might have missed. So the female (and non-binary) perspective is welcome here as well, seeing as how women were really the first ones to rally around their gender and bring the unique issues women face to the forefront, turning some of these taboo subjects into issues every single person knows about - so that it is easier for women to discuss these issues and deal with them, instead of pushing them under the rug, the way many men ignore mental health and/or physical health problems...
So tell me, what does this day mean to you? And if you are a male, what does that mean to you? I am personally using this day to reflect on what it means to be a man and how I can improve as a human being in that context. I am reminding myself to do a full body physical, because .. well, you just never know. I am reminding myself to take better care of my mental health, and to try to open up better when I have problems I do not want other people to know about. I am reminding myself to try to better understand the female perspective, because that's very important as well, and because historically that gender has faced a lot more challenges than men ever have. And that's the thing - there are things we could learn from the female approach here that could help us as well. While it is almost never a good idea to generalize, men are in many ways stubborn about many of these issues. The stigma of discussing a lot of this stuff is a big problem for our gender. Hopefully this discussion and this annual reminder that we are men will help move our gender in the right direction. We are all quite different men, and many here aren't men at all. But let's not forget that we are all human and on the same team.
So happy International Men's day! And please let's keep it civil
This is the day when us men can reflect on the unique challenges, needs, responsibilities, and problems with our male gender. This is a complex subject, which I hope we can keep civil, much like I'd expect from a discussion centering around International Women's Day.
These are important subjects to discuss. Male suicide is out of control in many western countries and there remains a stigma for men to discuss these issues, as well as a lack of support services specifically for this purpose. Many men feel like they do not have anybody to turn to when they struggle with thoughts about suicide, so they just pull the trigger.. sort to speak.. It is incredibly depressing to see so many young and old men kill themselves every year, when in many cases some therapy or just somebody willing to listen would have been a great first step towards fixing the underlying issues, or at least preventing suicide as being a viable option in that person's mind.. With the economy in many western countries not really doing very well right now, and many people having employment issues and other related concerns, this also seems like a good time to bring up these issues here.
If anybody on here is ever feeling suicidal, or you just want somebody to talk to.. no matter what your gender, you can always message me. I am sitting at home pretty much 24/7 and am on chat services like discord, so if anything I would be willing to listen to your issues. I am not a trained psychologist in any sense of the word, but I do know that just talking can make a huge difference. So don't be shy, if you have problems feel free to send me a message. The worst that could happen is we become friends.
It is also important to remember the physical challenges men face - such as prostate cancer, which kills about 1 in 40 men in America. That's a crazy statistic and it's something men never talk about. Women are doing it right - look at how much attention and funding breast cancer has gotten over the years. It used to be a bit of a taboo subject as well, but over the decades women have educated themselves and now openly talk about this issue with each other. But us men, we do not like to talk about our testicles... So many men do not end up doing simple checkups that could easily save their lives. This has got to stop, this idea that you are "too manly" to cry or talk about your health issues or mental health issues. These gender roles have been a part of our society for a while, so it will take some time to get rid of them, but right now they are very in the way of us solving some of these issues.
What other problems do men face? Personally I have only ever experienced mild sexual harrassment, and after shutting it down the other person listened to my concerns and backed off. That was easy enough for me in that situation, but I know that many men just don't want to talk about being sexually harassed, about being raped, or about facing domestic violence at home from their partner (no matter the gender). There is still a lot of stigma for men to discuss these issues openly. We just don't do it, we push it under the rug and hope it goes away. We don't want our friends and family to know.
STOP
It's okay to talk about these issues. I am not sure how to really change the culture around all this, but we need to be able to openly discuss such issues. Our gender is "lucky" in that the vast majority of these sexual and domestic violence issues affects women, and not us. And that is important to note. Most of the time I don't have to worry about this stuff.. BUT IT STILL HAPPENS AND AFFECTS MANY MEN. The stigma surrounding discussing and reporting these problems needs to go away, but like I said that is not an easy battle. These things are deeply ingrained in our cultural psyche. They will not go away overnight.
And yes, this day should also be a reflection of how we can improve as a gender. You should never be judged by your gender, ever, but that does not mean that you can just ignore the historic injustices perpetrated by our gender either. These injustices must be on our mind, lest we forget about them. This day can't be used to compete with women over these issues. Their issues are in some ways similar to the issues we face, but we each have unique problems to deal with as well, and you can't forget that either.
So, tell me.. men of Civfanatics.. What does it mean to you to belong to the male gender? Do you like the associated gender stereotypes and so called gender roles? Do you think it's sexist when people tell you to "man up"? Do you wish you could cry without people judging you? Do you think it's possible for you, as a man, to both celebrate this day and your gender - while at the same time being retrospective about the historic problems our gender is wrapped up in?
This thread is not meant to be gender exclusive, much like I would not expect an International Women's Day thread to be exclusively for women. The best way to understand yourself is to change your point of view and attempt to see yourself from the outside - and since women exist outside of the male gender, they are in a unique position to critique us.. celebrate us.. and offer insights we otherwise might have missed. So the female (and non-binary) perspective is welcome here as well, seeing as how women were really the first ones to rally around their gender and bring the unique issues women face to the forefront, turning some of these taboo subjects into issues every single person knows about - so that it is easier for women to discuss these issues and deal with them, instead of pushing them under the rug, the way many men ignore mental health and/or physical health problems...
So tell me, what does this day mean to you? And if you are a male, what does that mean to you? I am personally using this day to reflect on what it means to be a man and how I can improve as a human being in that context. I am reminding myself to do a full body physical, because .. well, you just never know. I am reminding myself to take better care of my mental health, and to try to open up better when I have problems I do not want other people to know about. I am reminding myself to try to better understand the female perspective, because that's very important as well, and because historically that gender has faced a lot more challenges than men ever have. And that's the thing - there are things we could learn from the female approach here that could help us as well. While it is almost never a good idea to generalize, men are in many ways stubborn about many of these issues. The stigma of discussing a lot of this stuff is a big problem for our gender. Hopefully this discussion and this annual reminder that we are men will help move our gender in the right direction. We are all quite different men, and many here aren't men at all. But let's not forget that we are all human and on the same team.
So happy International Men's day! And please let's keep it civil