Bèta-science Humor

[Cecasander]

Heisenberg is driving on the highway.
Suddenly is pulled to a stop by a police officer.
Officer: "Sir, did you know how fast you were driving?"
Heisenberg: "No, but I know exactly where I am"

...



For people who are pretty bad at physics; Heisenberg's law is something like 'the faster you go, the more difficult it is to find your location'

 

[nihilistic]

More Heisenberg jokes:

Historians have concluded that W.Heisenberg must have been contemplating his love life when he discovered the Uncertainty Principle:
-When he had the time,he didn't have the energy
and,
-When the moment was right,he couldn't figure out the position...

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Why does the chicken cross the road?
Werner Heisenberg: We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was
on, but it was moving very fast.

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Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulb?
A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is.

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The Heineken Uncertainty Principle:
You can never be sure how many beers you had last night.

 

[Cecasander]

Anyone else jokes about physical laws?



Suplimental to the Heiniken Uncertainty Principle:

The more you drank last night, the less you remember about it.

 

[Dominix]

I had a list of funny observations by kids when they were taught physics. The only one that sticks in my mind right now is:

When planets go around in circles we say they're orbiting, when people do it we say they're insane.

Oh wait another one (more corny than funny)...

Teacher: Joe, what is the measurement for power?
Joe: What?
Teacher: That's correct!

Teacher: Bob, what is the measurement for resistance?
Bob: Um...
Teacher: That's correct!

 

[Perfection]

Originally posted by Dominix
When planets go around in circles we say they're orbiting, when people do it we say they're insane.

But planets travel in ellipses.

Wouldn't that mean that the cause of Insanity is lack eccentricity?