Lawyers a little question:)

[nc-1701]

As you may have known I have been having trouble with the parents of other kids in my homeschool group. I have been accused of things I haven't done, and now one of my best friends is not allowed to speak to me due to information given to his mother by a parent I know to be my enemy.

Now, I have no real way of finding out exactly what is said in most of these cases, but I am quite sure it is untrue or only partially true. (I know several rumors have been spread which are untrue) Do I have any chance at all of sueing there ass for slander? If I accuse them of slander who does the burden of proof rest on? Do I have to prove what they said was untrue, or do they have to prove it was?

I live in Georgia, United States if it matters...

Thank you

 

[nivi]

Think about it, if they make some rumor about you, you are just gonna prove it right by being a huge jerk.

 

[JZ_UK]

Yea, I'd assume state and the fact that its the US matter.

But key things to look for (and I assume this is true for all common law jurisdictions) are:

Intention to defame.
Whether the offending words were defamatory (I'd imagine tests vary)
Whether the offending words accused you of criminal conduct (in the UK that changes things considerably)
Whether the words were communicated
Whether the words are true

Standard of proof in civil actions is largely, "balance of probability" rather than "reasonable doubt" or any other measure, but they are possible... the burden can shift back and forth.

- I am not a US lawyer, I accept no liability, go seek advice from a defamation lawyer in your state

 

[nc-1701]

Think about it, if they make some rumor about you, you are just gonna prove it right by being a huge jerk.

This has been going on for months, it won't go away... I gradually lose more friends every few weeks as there parents are given some unknown information, and they to turn on me.

Right now I'm trying to figure out what exactly has been said, so I will be better able to make decision. I don't really plan on sueing them, but as a threat I might be able to end it all with it would certainly be nice. Of course if anyone has ideas other than legal action to deal with it I'de love the advice, but I'm really running out of options here.

 

[Godwynn]

I live in Georgia, United States if it matters...

I believe I've found your problem.

 

[Shadylookin]

I would give it up even if it's completely blatant it's still almost impossible to land a slander charge, and it won't make the bad things go away but probably reinforce them in their minds

 

[QuoVadisNation]

horribly misread*

There are two types of slander. Slander and Slander per se. In regular slander, the burden of proof is that you need to show that damage has been done to you. However, in regular slander, you would also need to prove that the mother deliberately spread the lies, which she knew were lies to begin with, with or without malice. In per se, you just need to prove that the claims by the mother are completely outrageous and insulting.

Not always easy.

edit: according to my legal dictionary, slander per ser only occurs when it "imputes" to the plaintiff any one of the following, 1) a crime involving moral turpitude, 2) a loathsome disease (such as aids, etc.), 3) conducts that adversely affects one's business or profession, or 4) unchastity (esp. of a woman)

So I think it's regular slander for you, nc-1701 (or at least, I hope so!)

 

[nc-1701]

Well, thanks...

All I really know is that she has told other mothers things so horrible that
a) They will no longer speak to my mother.
b) They give me nastly looks as I walk by.
c) They no longer allow their children anywhere near me.
I don't know what these things are though... I know she has apparently saved every message I have ever sent to ether of her children on her hard drive. Now I've been fighting with her son all summer long, and we've each cussed each other out more times than I can count. I seriously doubt that is what everyone's so upset about. My personal guess is that she has taken all of my messages, taken them out of context, and possibly touched them up a bit. But I have no evidence or proof, and while I'm working on that I'm going to have a very hard time.

While I have had troubles with some of the kids (Airsoft gun incident) most all of them think this is utter craziness.

In the end I have absolutely no interest in prosecuting, I just want her to "cease and desist", as well as retracting what statements she has made... Though I think some of you are right that I probably shouldn'ttry legally, that seems to be the only option left to protect my name.

 

[Synobun]

Go to the mothers, and ask them what the hell their problem is.

As simple as that....

 

[nc-1701]

Go to the mothers, and ask them what the hell their problem is.

As simple as that....

Done that, except I did it via a very polite E-mail with no swearing etc. Now it's a major part of their case against me, apparently it means I'm rude

One of my friends even talked me into trying to apologiz to them, well it had zero effect as well

I wouldn't be looking at legal options unless I had run out of sane ones...

I suppose I could still walk up to this mother the next time I see her (Friday), do that, and make damn sure I get some answers. I guess I don't really have much left to lose. Though think that could very badly...

 

[Mulholland]

Tough luck. You'll get over it. Parents are overprotective like that. You seem like a guy with a head on his shoulders just shrug it off(not your head). If your friends know these lies aren't true there shouldn't be a problem. Just wait the parents will find another ill in their child's life soon enough and lose focus on you. You'll make new friends soon enough bro. You're only 16.

 

[nc-1701]

Tough luck. You'll get over it. Parents are overprotective like that. You seem like a guy with a head on his shoulders just shrug it off(not your head). If your friends know these lies aren't true there shouldn't be a problem. Just wait the parents will find another ill in their child's life soon enough and lose focus on you. You'll make new friends soon enough bro. You're only 16.

Best advice yet probably

Thing is I've been waiting since mid June for them to get over it. I've totally cleaned up the way I am, I've cut down on my random swearing ALOT etc. but it makes no differance to them, and every few weeks they target new mother... For some reason though they don't seem to be losing focus...

Perhaps if I added a little background fr why I believe they are targetting me like this.
In about Febuary I started dating one parents daughter, another parents son had apparently had a crush on her or whatever, and with the help of the parents got her to ditch me, and go the prom with him. I threw a pretty big fuss about, and admit was rather unpolite to all parties involved. (Though at the time I didn't know the parents were involved). Anyway the two Moms that have spearheaded this mvement are their parents. This isn't about people protecting their kids from a percieved enemy, this is about trying to destroy me, because I didn't just politely watch while some . .. .. .. .. . stole my gf.
This is why think it won't just go away, they arec trying to destroy me, not protect nything...

 

[MobBoss]

One. It is a huge overstatement to say they are trying to 'destroy' you.

Two. Parents have every right to monitor who their kids have contact with.

Three. Its sounds to me like you may possible be guilty of the things they are saying about you via your own testimony here. You have admitted to several things that a parent would be completely within their right to take action on.

Four. If you really wanted to pursue this perhaps call an attorney in your local area...but in my opinion, you dont have a chance in proving your case considering your previous behavior.

 

[Elrohir]

Unless it's obviously untrue, obviously malicious, and public, you don't have any chance at all. You can't go to court and say "They told their children not to talk to me, and said lies about me!" That isn't going to fly. If they publicly said things to a lot of people that weren't true, with a clear intention to harm your reputation, then fine - but it doesn't sound like that's what they're doing.

 

[nc-1701]

One. It is a huge overstatement to say they are trying to 'destroy' you.

Two. Parents have every right to monitor who their kids have contact with.

Correct, but what I'm mad about is that they are working to make sure nobody else's kids can speak to me either. Which they really can't do...

Three. Its sounds to me like you may possible be guilty of the things they are saying about you via your own testimony here. You have admitted to several things that a parent would be completely within their right to take action on.

Yes, I do not pretend to be perfect, and what they are saying may be true, but I don't even know what they are saying just that it is very effective at turning people agaisnt me. My goal at this point was to find out what that was, and compare it to my own records. If differant then I would consider legal action, if not then your right they win.

Four. If you really wanted to pursue this perhaps call an attorney in your local area...but in my opinion, you dont have a chance in proving your case considering your previous behavior.

Yeah, I've talked to several other people as well, and this seems to be the concensus. So I've basicaly given up on that plan. Basicaly I'm just getting desperate here, and leaping at any idea that pops into my mind.

Though as a Christian parent who probably has a great deal in common with these poeple Mobboss. What do you suggest as an alternate course of action? I have no desire to be friends with this mother, or her children. I simply want them to stop trashing my reputation, and trying to convince other people to turn on me.

 

[MobBoss]

Though as a Christian parent who probably has a great deal in common with these poeple Mobboss. What do you suggest as an alternate course of action? I have no desire to be friends with this mother, or her children. I simply want them to stop trashing my reputation, and trying to convince other people to turn on me.

I would say live your own life and just leave them alone. Dont give them anymore fuel to add to the fire - in other words clean up your act and keep it clean. Once you realize that such opinions are based upon perception of you, if you can change peoples perception by changing your own behavior, then they will slowly change their opinion of you. It wont happen quick, but it will eventually happen. And finally, simply realize that you cant control what other people feel, think, say or do. Just let it go and continue with your life. Chances are in about 4 years your life will have changed so much that all of this will seem pretty silly to you.

 

[nc-1701]

Hmm... Thanks Mobboss interestingly enough your advice is almost identical to my Moms

I've kept my "act" totally clean for a month and a half or so... I guess I just keep ignoring it, and waiting for something to change.
Though yeah, good point in four years I plan on being very far away from here...

 

[mrt144]

lmao, did they state that you were a fascist? cause that is awful AND true.

 

[Mango]

Settle a spy in the enemies capital and intercept their messages.

 

[nc-1701]

Settle a spy in the enemies capital and intercept their messages.

I've been working on that, but most of the kids are to scared to help me

And I have no idea how go about infecting there comps with key-loggers... Plus doing that would probably be illegal...