Yeah, seriously. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but bear with me:
Maybe my problem is that I was hoping for Civ 5 to be engaging, complex, deep, and replayable
for me - but perhaps it wasn't even intended to have that appeal, but rather to appeal to players that are new to strategy games or the Civ series. Nothing shocking here, we knew that was a big part of the target audience. Obviously it also appeals to a lot of Civ veterans too, maybe those for whom depth and complexity in previous games was redundant, unnecessary, too unwieldy, etc.
Maybe the value in Civ5 is drawing in those players who wouldn't otherwise be interested in Civ. (I thought Civ Rev was supposed to be the gateway drug, but I guess they need to be eased in with a little more complexity.) I do think that's a good role for a game to play, because of course I do want the franchise to draw more players, and am happy to see people discovering Civ for the first time.
But maybe I should think of Civ 5 like the Harry Potter novels - not something I'm personally interested in experiencing, but something that will get people interested in something they might not be otherwise. I don't hate Civ 5, and I don't hate the Harry Potter books. I don't own those books, though - because I knew they weren't written for me and wouldn't really appeal to me. (It's not like the Harry Potter series was advertised as being written by J.R.R. Tolkien; then I would have bought them and felt similarly disappointed.) I'm glad Harry Potter has such a massive appeal - I think it's awesome that they got so many kids interested in reading books.
I should probably let go of the idea that Civ5 was supposed to be appealing to players like me in the first place, and get over the disappointment I felt when it wasn't fun or engaging for me. Accept it as being intended for another audience altogether, value it for getting some new players interested in the franchise, and move on altogether. Maybe Civ 6 will be designed for players who enjoy those redundant, unwieldy, complex systems - in five years or so, the Civ 5 vets may want something with more depth to it and then we'll all be happy. Only time will tell. Til then, I think it's time to let go of the hope that Civ 5 will somehow become the game I thought I purchased, because the chances of that happening seem pretty slim.