I'm not sure on what affect used nukes have on relations either, and funnily enough I have a sort of related question I've been meaning to ask here as well. In one of my scenarios I'm noticing that if I give a AI player 2 nukes he will use one on me, however if I only give him 1 nuke he won't use it. So I'm guessing that the AI believes holding on to at least 1 nuke for "our words are back by nuclear weapons" diplomacy bullying is more critical than using one.