Hi Kalimakus
Couldn't help posting on this thread as I'm having the same dilema.
I play marathon huge emp/Imm games and quite naturaly (naturely

) go for FOL because of prerequiste techs:- hunters and elder councils.
I tend to find that by turn 400 (first quarter) most of my neighbours are FOL and, if I've pushed sailing, most of my continent.
Thats the problem...It's MY continent!!!
I'm now left with the option of intercontinental "expansion " which is expensive and my fellow AI buddies are useless at. Or interneccine squabbling and culture wars whose long term effects are to weaken your (MY) continent and economy, only to get beaten up by a crusading Varn /Sabathiel or out teched by a raging lunatic wearing a clown's costume! With the dwarves on your (MY!) continent and RoK its easy.... But when everyone is FOL...you got a problem.
This is when I'm starting to think about CoE.
FoL is great, mainly because guardian of nature is so broken at the moment... +10 happiness (or more) to a religion whose real bonus is added food production. This means you can still Max pop your cities but don't need to worry about imported luxuries and war weariness. Whereas, in the more peaceful bulider /out-teching games, open border agreements are a requirement for trade route commerce. HN is the way to go and spiders are only good upto about the time that your friends start sending in hunters.
I don't know about you but I dont want my friends sharing MY barb training ground just because they happen to be on MY CONTINENT!!!
I'd suggest building up both equally and using FOL for war (the long-term continent crushing type) and CoE for peace.
That's a strategy the specfics will vary with each game.