Troops on border - what are the rules?

I feel like this became an issue in this expansion again, at least I don't remember it being an issue.

Now even if I have open borders I am getting this announcement, and they removed the one where I can ignore it. So now if I am just trying to move my troops around their territory I get the great option of either breaking a promise to them or declaring war.

Its ridiculous and they need to fix this. Moving troops is nearly impossible. I even got called out on it when my units were in neutral territory that was 3 or 4 tiles AWAY from their borders. Driving me insane.
 
The broken troops promise had a big impact in two of my recent games as well and it is very annoying. In my recent game I was in a joint war and alliance with Cyrus. Cyrus had at least a dozen units INSIDE my territory which is fine with me because we are allied and fighting a war together, however Cyrus sends me a promise request to move troops from his border. I made the promise and ended up getting the broken promise penalty. So he can flood me with units and I can't ask him to move them but if I have a unit or two within 2-3 tiles of his border while allied and in a joint war and I get a penalty?!?
 
look, its pretty easy as far as I can see.
If you try to play peacefully or use the majority of rules as you think you should you just get frustrated.
Just go and kill everything. It works the fastest for all but cultural victories.
Someone says "too close" you should be pleased... you get 30 diplomacy points for promising not to do it again. Free money, who cares if you do not keep your promise?
oh no!... I am just soo scared.....they called an emergency against me... another 200 diplomacy points.
Seriously ... play as a warmonger and everyone else spends their points voting for emergencies and you gain loads from defending and making promises.... "Oh sorry I promise I will not spy on you again"... 30 diplomacy points please. Liberate CS's as I go... 100 diplomacy points each.
At the end of the day everyone has huge grievances against me but no diplomacy points left and no army to take me out... do I care?
The warmonger system or the grievance system... both fail.
 
Sounds like you're "the biggest bully on the block." But what if you are NOT the biggest? What if there are one or more warmongers with bigger armies and greater inclination to use them against you? (Or do you make a point of selecting only pacifist civs to compete against?)
 
Call me crazy, but I think a well-designed 4X game should allow viable strategies other than "kill em all."
 
Also you can still press esc. Does that go around the problem?
 
One of my big pet peeves is when this comes up with someone you're in joined war with. I move my troops around in targets territory, and the other AI civ will hate me for having troops on their borders and not moving them while laying siege on a town of our common enemy. Come one, give me a break and fix this bs.
 
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