What's your favourite Simpson quote?

[Rodgers]

Cheif Wiggam after letting a prisoner go by accident

"er, look boys if anyone asks what happened to him, just tell them we beat him to death ok?"

 

[NY Hoya]

"Stupid, sexy Flanders"

Said by Homer, while skiing when he can't get the picture of Flanders' bum out of his mind.

 

[anarchywrksbest]

I think this is right:
"Heaven is great, dead people are so lucky. I wish I was dead..."

"Simpson, Homer Simpson, he's the greatest guy in history! Form the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree...(crashes car into tree)"

 

[Chris85]

Moe says this after he decides to kick Homer out of his bar.

Moe: "Barney could you show him to the exit."
Barney: "There's an exit?"

 

[CrazyScientist]

On of my favs.

Homer (to postal employee): "Helllloooo. My name is Mr. Burns. I think you have a letter for me.:

Postal Employee: Ok Mr. Burns. What's your first name?

Homer: I...don't knoooow.


Or better still

Homer (on the phone): "Hello Dean. You're a stupidhead!"

Dean Peterson (seeing Homer in phone booth outside window): "Homer is that you?"

Homer: "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!"

 

[gr8ful wes]

Oh lisa, just because i dont care doesnt mean i dont understand

 

[napoleon526]

From the "Behind the Laughter" episode:

"But reckless spending and interracial homoeroticism were just two entries in the Encyclopedia Self-destructica."

"The dream was over. Coming up next, was the dream really over? Yes, yes it was. Or was it?"

" (Homer) That's ridiculus. Even if I wanted to there's no way I could get all five necessary pills into her cereal without her noticing."

 

[kmad]

Groundskeeper Willie: BONJOURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Bart: So, Homer.. did you.. rock the casbah??
Homer: BART!!! ..yes

Homer: mmm... unexplained bacon

Homer: mmm... urinal fresh

Homer: mmm... mediciny

Abe Simpson: I never thought I could shoot down a German plane. But last year I proved myself wrong.

Homer: mmm... sixty-four slices of american cheese

Ralph: I bent my wookie

 

[napoleon526]

Grandpa Simpson quotes:

Your dad used to be smart as a monkey! Then the Simpson gene kicked in. Now he's dumb as a chimp.

Let's see...I'm an elk, a mason, a communist, I'm the president of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason...ah, here it is, the Stonecutters!

 

[andyo]

"my cat's breath smells like cat food"
ralph

 

[napoleon526]

Burns: Oh, and one other thing...You must find the Jade Monkey before the next full moon!

Smithers: Actually sir, we found the Jade Monkey. It was in your glove compartment.

Burns: And the road maps and ice scraper?

Smithers: They were in there too, sir.

Burns: Excellent...

 

[mydisease]

I paraphrase somewhat:

Skinner (when Bart's reading his thoughts) : I know you can hear what I'm thinking Bart... You slip up and your ass is mine. That's right, I think words I would never say.

Homer : I know you can hear what I'm thinking boy... meow,meow,meow,meow,meow,meow,meow,meow,

 

[benjdm]

Homer, after falling from the treehouse too many times:

"Stupid gravity !"

I use that one all the time when I drop something.

 

[Scrimshaw]

Ralph: "Me fail english. That's unpossible!"

Abe when homer was young: "I used to be with it, then they changed what it was, now what I'm with isn't it and what is it is weird and scary to me."

 

[CultureFreak18]

Homer- "Ahh! Cobras!"
***
Duffman- "Duffman can't breathe! Oh no!"
***
Moe- "Does anybody know a Homer? Homer Sexual?"
***
Flanders- "Oh no! I think we hit something!"
Homer- "Yeah! I hope it was Flanders! Ha Ha Ha! What? I'm only kidding! Hey, you're all right!"
***
Flanders- "Quick Maude! Get me the alcohol-free alcohol!"
***
Homer (Watching T.V.)- "Look at those idiots. I already paid my taxes last year!
Lisa- "Dad, you have to pay them again this year too!"
Homer- "No you don't Li-, OH CRAP!"
Marge- "Homer, I put the tax forms on your to do pile!"
Homer- "I have a to do pile?"
***

 

[omichyron]

"It will stop a 20 megaton blast. No more. No less."

Unfortunately, I can't recall the name of the character who said this

 

[Furry Spatula]

That was the one armed man who sells all the military paraphenalia. But anywho, my favorite quote goes something like this ...

"Lisa, I dont need to think, thats why we have the government" said by Homer of course.

A funny side note. Some protestors used this as their argument against a reforendum in BC. "We dont need a reforendum, The government is supposed to make descisions for us." Ok now if i recall correctly we make the descisions and our representative brings the ideas for the parliament or something to that effect. But i dont want to thread jack so i'll stop rambling now

 

[Furry Spatula]

"Homer is not a communist. My Homer may be a liar, a pig, an iditot, a communist, but he is NOT a pornographer." --- Abe


"Hah, who would wanna live in that country, you are gay" --- Homer

"I would rather let a 1000 guilty guys go free ... than chase after them." --- Chief Wiggum

Anyone remember Homer's Max Powers song?

 

[Juize]

When everybody's trying to return their tax papers---

- Hahahaha! Look at those idiots! I already paid my taxes LAST YEAR!.. (Homer, watching TV)
- Err... Homer... (Lisa)
- What, my little girl? (Homer)
- You have to pay taxes every year... (Lisa)
- No, Lisa, you see... (watches how everyone stares at him) OH, CRAP!

 

[Chris85]

Originally posted by CultureFreak18
Flanders- "Oh no! I think we hit something!"
Homer- "Yeah! I hope it was Flanders! Ha Ha Ha! What? I'm only kidding! Hey, you're all right!"

I love that one.

*Homer: "I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaaamin'."

*Ralph: "Me fail English, thats unpossible?"

*Homer: "Wait a minute, there’s something bothering me about this place. I know! This lesbian bar doesn’t have a fire exit! Enjoy your death trap ladies!"
Woman: "What was her problem?"