Y'all need to learn how to play a REAL civilization -- India!
Mahatma ma ylook all skinny and poor, but that Rel+Com combo is killer for building a real civilization to stand the test of time! Off the bat you can build temples and at half the shields non-rels can build ... why bother building some pesky attack force when you can just culture flip the AI cities? Just keep a strong defensive force, build your trade network and city improvs, and keep them cheap religious improvs coming!
And when the game cheap-lames you out of resources, your UU can save the day ... may not pack spectacular punch, but the elephant doesn't require any strategic resources.
The French are a decent second for building a decent empire with Com+Ind.