[C3C] Celts - Emperor - Random Tech

[Ruin]

This story/game log is inspired by Quintillus . However, although it's similiar, in no way should be construed as a "flex" or "challenge", as he is a true legend and triple-threat (playing, storytelling, and programming). Just thought his idea was interesting, and if one person is interested in reading it, then it will have been worthwhile, as I have derived hours of enjoyment from reading the stories by him, SirPleb, Tr1cky, Lanzelot, Spoonwood, Takeo, Arathorn, and many others.

Game: Conquests (using GOG C3C version)

Civ: Celts

Considered several others, Ag + Sci, Ag + Mil, or Ag + Ind, because 1) I don't change governments enough to get the most out of Rel, and 2) Figured on a large map and with the challenge I might not be able to pull off a Gallic Swordsman rush. But eh, Brennus is my favorite leader. Just such a cocky chad. And even though I'm of Visigothic descent, there's a faint resemblance. Huh, maybe I'll make an Alaric leader.

Map Size: Large

Difficulty: Emperor

I am pretty confident of my ability to win on Emperor, but maybe the variant will make it much harder. If it becomes a romp, I'll still finish, but next time move up to Demigod.

Opponents: 11 Random, Normal aggression

Landmass: 60% Continence

My most fun game ever was COTM 1, (which I played in idk 2020) and that was continents. Like discovering other civs, but all the sailing about on archipelago maps is just too tiring.

Geographics: Set this to random which was a mistake, bc I think I got 3 billion, and there's too many mountains. Oh well. I'll use CivAssist and report back.

Victory Conditions: Defaults

Barbs and Scientific Great Leaders: None

Mods and Exploits

1. I'll be using random.org (the android app generally) to select a tech for development. I thought about not trading like Quintillus, but it is one of the parts of the game that I enjoy.

2. I use C3X, by Flintlock, which is essential IMO to having fun. AFAIK I'm using the default setting which make the AI use armies and artillery correctly, with the only change being that airdropped units can move, which was something I personally asked him for to make paratroopers more useful.

3. City flipping is turned off. Just so unrealistic, and counterintuitive, particularly losing a massive amount of troops. I thought about doing a thing like Tr1cky where I could reload if I had troops >= population points and the city flipped, but eh.

4. Speaking of reloading and other exploits, I will play by GOTM standards. However, I currently have to play on my daughter's laptop, and the keys are mapped differently than I'm used to. For example the D and R keys, and E and F keys are swapped. (She's normal, I made a personalized keymap that is similar to Colemak). So if I do something blatantly idiotic like disband a worker instead of making a road, or sending a unit to explore in the face of danger rather than fortifying, I will reload until I get my new computer and then I'll "play it as it lies" when it comes to misclicks.

5. I plan to mod ironclads+ to make it virtually impossible for a destroyer to lose to a wooden ship for example. I've already started, but never used the editor before so idk if it's too late. If I wait until the industrial age, I should have the whole map anyway so there won't be any spoilers.

6. There were a couple of other changes I have always wanted to make, such as making the AI not hang on to useless techs like Free Artistry when their entire existence is threatened, making them more lenient about unintentional trade route breakages, making Gallic Swordsmen able to be built instead of MedInf so Feudalism doesn't make Celts weaker, and making all ships have longer ranges. No disease. Again since the game already started, this point is more or less just a reminder of crap to try for next time.

Starting Position:

In accordance with the Random nature of the game, I accepted the first start generated. Whoops, already screwed up with the screenshots. I was on the hill to the west and moved 1E.

Terms and Conditions:

Please like and/or comment. Critiques of my play are totally fine. I hope you enjoy reading it!

 

[Ruin]

3950 BC: Rolled a 4 out of 6. Wheel study the we'll! Kinda disappointing, since we don't need no stinkin' horses, as Celts are notoriously fast runners.

---

3650 BC: Found some luxury! Can never remember if those are Dyes or Silks.

---

2900 BC: Got 2 warriors out scouting. We found Alesia. Actually probably founded it a little while ago, as I doubt it started at size 2. Chopping for granary.

---

2630 BC: We meet Japan and their leader Tojo. We know how to make Pots, but he is utterly unimpressed by this. I think he would have given Wheel, but we had only 3 turns left.

---

2550 BC: "Glorious" and "Advanced" my butt, guy wears a Hershey's Kiss on his head. Oddly, I do not see "The Magnificent Celts" anywhere on this list, causing me to question the veracity of this "Venereal Bed".

---

2510 BC: Heck yes, only took us 1490 years to learn how to make stone donuts. Roll a 3 for Alphabet.

Spoiler Alert:

2470 BC: Not sure what this is a picture of, maybe me accidentally moving my spearman (I didn't reload this time). Very cozy with no barbs. Got some marsh to the south, kinda wish I was industrious, but we're more efficient than the AI anyhow. Got 2 horses.

2470 BC: Sup, Maya Angelou. My attitude never goes above Annoyed with Smoke, as I hate looking at his tattooed visage. What's that? No, I was born like that and besides we have not invented mirrors yet so shh. Get the Warrior Code for Wheel. He'll probably stick them in those earlobes.

 

[tjs282]

I'll be watching. Al-ways watching...

(BTW, the answer to your question re. modding is -- unfortunately -- yes. The .biq rules are stored in the .sav file, so if you want to mod unit-stats, you have to do that in the .biq before you start a game using that .biq. Once a game has been started, you can't make changes to the units on the fly)

 

[Ruin]

Now I understand why I have seen people having friends edit the maps for them. But I also saw you explain to someone in another thread about editing files and then generating new games from there. The truth is, I need to do more reading and then give it a try for myself. Thanks @tjs282!

 

[Ruin]

2110 BC: Meet the Chinese and their fuzzy, communist hat-wearing leader. Also meet Rognak Lothbroth, who makes Smoke's facial tattoos look tasteful. Actually I'm sure I met both of these dirtbags on previous turns, but now it's time to hustle them.

* Give China the Wheel and 4 gold for Masonry

* Give Vikings Masonry for Alphabet and 10 gold.

* Give Tokyo Rose Masonry for 113 gold and 1 GPT.

I think I gave China Ceremonial Burial and the Alphabet for Iron Working. Don't have a screenshot - but look, we have Iron! Also a 3rd city.

Here's Entremont, which has the following demographics : 64,000 swarthy men, 32,000 belly dancers, 32,000 tax-collecting wizards, and 32,000 glum white women.

I summon the head of the Celtic League of Women Voters into my throne cave.

Me: How can you be unhappy living in a place like this? We have a granary for crying out loud.

Stacey: It's just too crowded.

Me: Don't give me that nonsense, the men are perfectly happy!

Stacey: Well, we women do not approve of belly dancing and we are not interested in magic shows.

Me: How about I station some strapping, shirtless Gallic Swordsmen in the city?

Stacey says that would make her constituency content, and I dismiss her. Hopefully stone-age warriors will do the trick for now.

Need a new tech, which, as you may have guessed from last episode's spoiler, is going to be Mathematics. I guess that's all right. Like catapults, though with all the mountains and marshes, driving around in one of those is going to be a pain in the neck.

 

[Ruin]

1870 BC - Trade Iron Wroking to Japan for 30 gold and 1 GPT.

1790 BC

Me: Psst Rodmar, you want some Pots? All you gotta do is learn me to Write.

Radbrook: Sorry, I'm busy.

Me: I'll throw in thirty bucks.

Rothbard: No thank you.

Me: I'll show you how to Work Iron. You can craft weapons and stuff. That's way cooler than Writing, which is for nerds.

Rhubarb: I am probably Insulted by this deal.

Me: Bruh, who are you even going to Write to? You're the only one who knows how.

Rhumba: I enjoy journalling.

About even on cities with the AI. Math is taking forever to learn, though, possibly because Celtic schools only offer gym class and metal shop.

1700 BC

Meet Isabella. We have 5 cities, she has 4, but she knows Mysticism and we have nothing to trade her. I am fascinated by her Amazonian physique, the way her eyebrows merge with her hairline, and the plunging neckline of her burlap dress.

Isabella: My eyes are up here.

Me: Why are they solid green??

That remark caused her to be Cautious with me, but I've no doubt our relations will improve as my rivals are all hideously ugly.

Kick myself for not mentioning my curragh to Isabella, as I know she likes Seafaring.

1675 BC

The women of Entremont are pleased with my pious decision to build a temple and fire the belly dancers and wizards. I decide not to tell them I did it to impress Isabella who's into spirtuality and Mysticism and junk like that.

1650 BC

Borrow some money from the Chinese. This is from a strategy I read about by Moonsinger. Now I have 115 gold, but still nobody will sell me Writing or Mysticism, but it's fine.

1550 BC

It is 1550 BC and I took this screenshot because I have 6 cities in almost perfect symmetry. Only Lugburz spoils the effect (because I wanted to get some extra coast).

Me: How about this then, huh? I'll give you Pots and my mom will pay you to tutor me in English.

Rargle Lathrop: I am going to call the cops if you don't stop bothering me.

 

[Ruin]

 

[Ruin]

1550 BC - Admiring my portrait when Trade Advisor shows up.

Trade Advisor: Our workers have completed a road to bring Silks into Entremont...

Me: I'm pretty sure those are Dyes. You see how the red and blue mixes together to make kind of a blue puddle at the bottom? I think it's called indigo.

Trade Advisor: This will make the citizens there happy.

Me: Why? They already have clothes. Ohhh, you mean like underpants and stockings and stuff.

Trade Advisor: Good Work!

1525 BC

I take out a student loan from Smoke...

... but Ragmar still won't tutor me.

 

[Ruin]

1525 BC

Not sure whether I bought Mysticism from Smoke J or Izzy, but I bought it, so now...

Seriously, dude? Fine. Be Annoyed

1500 BC

Our little curragh putters along. Here's a landbridge.

Desperate for cash, I sell Mysticism to Tokyo Khan for 11 bucks.

Desperate for Granary, I slaughter thousands of people.

Domestic Advisor: My Lord, please don't do this.

Me: No listen, this will actually increase the population. Trust me.

1450 BC

Hip hip hurrah
A Celtic curragh
Is Eastward bound for glory!

They set their sails
Between the whales...
Will they live to tell their story?

1425 BC

 

[Ruin]

1450 BC

We're doing pretty good. Last in score of course, but shockingly Entremont is the most culturaled city in the known world. Other civs have been building wonders but I'll spare you mention of those unless they matter.

1425 BC

Ragbag the Viking extorts me for 22 gold and I pay him. He had better spend it quickly. I plan to murder him before he invents Invention: I hate Berserkers and having to garrison my coastal cities.

1400 BC

The curragh continues to thrive! Who said the Celts were not a Seafaring people?

1375 BC

Land ho! One more turn and our heroic curragh will be in safe shallow waters, ready to make diplomatic history. Captain Barfind, whose name means "Finder of Pubs" in Old Celtic, doubles the grog rations, and orders the crew, "full speed ahead to that thar whale tail," the sighting of which he judges to be an auspicious sign, given the journey's beginning. He goes below deck to change into a fresh horsehide uniform in order to make a good impression.

1360 BC (interturn)

We learn Mathematics.

I trade it to China for Polytheism and 17 gold.

Then finally, I am able to get Writing from that jealous nerd Ragnar. Not only that, but he gives me Horseback Riding and 60 gold (actually 38 gold and the 22 he owed me, it's fine, I did not forget).

Smoke gives me 71 gold for Mathematics. I suspect he's going to use this knowledge to sell drugs but I won't say anything.

Finally, I sell Polytheism to Isabella.

Me: Yo, check this out. I know you like Mystic Spirits and stuff. How about a whole bunch of gods?

Isabella: Ooh, that's a good idea.

Me: Give me 23 bucks.

Isabella: Hmm, how much for just one God?

Me: I do not know anything about that.

1350 BC

The curragh sinks, possibly due to the fact that after nearly 100 years at sea, Captain Barfind had gone a bit daft, and forgot that there was no crew besides him, and more critically, no "below decks". He washes up on a piece of driftwood near Lugdumum, repentant but ready to try again. Upset at this near miss, but understanding the tyranny of randomness, I order the construction of a new curragh.

 

[Ruin]

1350 BC

Need a new tech, and roll Construction.

Pitch the dice at the head of the Technological Gaming Commission. "It will take us infinity time to learn this!" I howl.

"Incorrect," says my science advisor. "If we dedicate a even single scientist to the task, it will take only 50 turns."

I start to calm down.

"Okay, what about if we spent 80% of our GNP on it?"

"42 turns."

1300 BC

Make some embassies

1225 BC

seven cities, only two tiles off from being symmetrical

12 warriors, 6 workers, 1 archer, 1 spearman, 1 chariot, 1 horseman

my daughter's desktop wallpaper

1125 BC

Trondheim completes The Pyramids

More embassies

1050 BC

Maya demands some tech, then declares war on us, thereby forfeiting their GPT payments. The Mayan Army begins marching towards us!!

The Mayan Army:

 

[Ruin]

1000 BC

Quick Save Challenge, which I've never done in a GOTM and have never really been much good at, but I'm kinda proud how things are looking. 8 cities and a settler on the way. Suede taught me the virtues of quick early expansion, but one thing I did better this time around that I learned from CFC (can't remember where) is not letting my capital oscillate between 3 and 1 pop, rather letting it grow to 4-6. This has made a world of difference.

Generals Effree and Effait report: 1 settler, 8 workers, 12 warriors, 1 archer, 1 spearman, 1 chariot, 2 horsemen, 2 catapults, 1 gallic swordsman (in pear tree). Still in last place in score, power has spiked up. Scandinavia clear power leader but declining. Spain, China, Maya and me roughly tied. Japan lagging. In culture, Maya and Japan leading, Vikings, Spain and me in 2nd, China lagging.

975 BC

I do not like the city names Agedincum or Eboracum, because they have a bad word in them, so I let my 7 year old son name this one. (his name is not Danny)

925 BC

Mayan army continues to approach

Trade Tokuwaga Horseback Riding for 23 gold and a worker. Idiot - his crummy civ needs all the help it can get!

900 BC

One of my exploring warriors darts away from a javelin thrower. Had a chance two turns ago to tear up that road but I didn't want to risk death and worse, the shame of being enslaved.

850 BC

Move my forces towards the area of the wilderness in which the Mayan incursion is expected. 4 divisions of warriors, 3 gallic swordsmen, a company of spearmen, two of horsemen, and a battalion of archers. Some of the horsemen climb a mountain to get a better view and see one lone Mayan warrior approaching.

After we get done laughing, I sign peace with Smokey J and make him pay me 40 bucks.

 

[need my speed]

Since when is 'cum' a 'bad word' (what is a bad word anyway - it's a Latin suffix, for all you know 'pirate' is the most grievous insult possible in Vietnamese).

Also, following, because I always approve of stories like these (an utter shame this practice died after Civilization IV).

 

[Ruin]

'pirate' is the most grievous insult possible in Vietnamese

My humblest apologies, or as you would say,Tôi xin lỗi, cướp biển. The problem is that is what I modded Pr*vateers to (because in English that word contains a reference to the genitalia).

 

[Ruin]

730 BC

Sell Polytheism to Japan for 34 gold. This finally gives us enough money to establish an embassy in the Mayan capital of "Itchy Chickens." Frankly it was not worth it.

Send out a second, sturdier, better manned curragh.

It sinks immediately, and I resolve to wait for galleys.

610 BC

Science advisor: Sir, our prophets have learned Construction.

Me: It only took a thousand years.

Advisor: Actually 700.

Me: What does it even do?

Advisor: It lets us build Aqueducts. How... could you not know that?

Me: Brennus only builds cities on fresh water. Now get out of here! Good thing you're so slow - I'll only have to look at you five more times before the world ends.

Trade Smoke Construction, 104 gold and 1 GPT for Map Making and Monarchy. Maybe the embassy was worth it as he's now cautious with me and eager to get back to doing business with us by which I mean lending us money and then attacking us when we try to pay him back. I must say this is a refreshing change from the typical Mayan practice of declaring war to erase their own debts.

Radbroad is apparently too good for manual labor and won't teach me the Philosophy he learned at college. Shoulda gone to trade school, no wonder he's broke.

Get Philosophy from the Spanish instead and sell it to China for 37 Gold.

600 BC

Early one afternoon, I'm reposing on the floor in a pleasant stupor, when in the domestic advisor prods me in the head with her toe.

"The Celtic people are revolting!" she informs me.

"Well we do have some rather bad habits," I admit, looking around the debris of my cave. "But Sabrina and... Bridget? No that's Gwyneth, they look similar from this angle. Anyway, these two lasses would surely object to being characterized as revolting! Or they would if they were awake."

"A revolution!" says Domestic Advisor. Celtia is in the throes of anarchy!"

"Well, not for very long, since I'm Religious. By the way, is that the name of this country? It's funny, I've been ruler for three and a half millennia, and I never knew that. In fact, I was pronouncing Celtic like the basketball team for a long while." I pause. "How about Celtica? Or Celtsylvania?"

"The people have made a list of demands, and they say they will riot until you meet them."

She hands me a scrap of parchment:

1. We are tired of you ruling over us as a despotic tyrant. We demand that you rule over us as an absolute monarch.
2. We want more troops garrisoned in our homes.
3. We no longer want to be whipped to death. If you desire population reduction, then you must humanely starve us, send us into exile (settler disband), or, if you're in a real hurry, turn our city into a heap of rubble while we're trapped in our homes.
4. We want you to temporarily hire two clowns to entertain us during the revolution.

Me: This is outrageous! Clowns? Can't we have belly dancers?

Advisor: I'll check with the Celtic League of Women Voters...

The next day...

Me: I know you were looking forward to entertaining the country during these difficult times but since you're here, and I've already paid...

 

[need my speed]

To be clear, I am not Vietnamese, and I highly doubt 'pirate' is an insult, I just find it weird to censor 'cum' (and, even weirder, 'private') and I find this censorship in general to be very unhealthy. But, to each their own, let's just enjoy the story.

 

[Ruin]

@need my speed : The one without the gannet-!!! They've ALL got the gannet!! It's a Standard British Bird, the gannet, it's in all the books!!!

Me; Well, I don't like them... they wet their nests.

 

[Ruin]

590 BC

My Exploration Advisor entered my throne cave to find me in a foul mood. The belly dancers had gone, and worse, they'd refused to accept being whipped as compensation for their services and demanded gold instead. Alas the anarchic "touch-and-go" phase was over.

Advisor: Sire, I have some bad news. The two brand new galleys you had commissioned to explore the ocean - they've both sank.

Me: And their crews?

Advisor: I'm afraid they've all perished.

Me (excitedly): So we don't have to pay their salaries?

Advisor: Well, no, but perhaps a gesture to their mourning families...

Me: I'll give you a "gesture". Do you know how much it costs to upgrade a Neanderthal Warrior into a Gallic Swordsman? The mustache upkeep alone...

In an attempt to boost my spirits, the advisor launched into what had always been my favorite part of the year: the reports from my four exploring warriors, revealing the new peoples they'd met and the resources we would someday plunder from them. However, as of late, even this had grown tiresome. Everything seemed to be mountains, and we had plenty of those at home.

"Issue an order to these explorers," I commanded, and the advisor dutifully produced his quill pen.

"By order of your royal majesty... Or should it be 'By royal decree'? You decide, and throw in some boilerplate thanking them for their millennia of service to the nation. Then tell them to commit suicide."

"You can't be s-serious, sire!"

"You're right," I muse, ignoring his disrespectful stutter. "Tell them to proceed to the nearest Celtic town first so they can least be among their countrymen one last time - and then kill themselves. No, you know what - it's not worth it. The original order stands."

He looks aghast, and even more so when I suddenly ask about *his* salary.

"This is a volunteer position," he bleats. "I'm not even an official advisor."

"That's what I like to hear. Now get to work building me a new galley. And do a better job at it this time because you're going to be riding in it."

"M-me? But I don't know anything about sailing!"

"I'm sure you'll pick it up after sixty years or so. Now run along, and be sure to square your jib line and forecastle your poop deck or whatever nautical thing you people are always saying."

....

The alchemists come in next, looking a bit skittish after having heard all that yelling.

"Sire, it's been determined that next we're we're going to learn... mumble," says their leader.

"This Mumble better either make me money or help me kill people," I warn.

"It's, ahh... Literature," pipes up one brave soul.

"Did you say, Literature? As in Libraries? Specifically... as in The Great Library?"

"Yes, your majesty."

I give a triumphant war cry and leap up to perform the Celtic Victory Dance:

1. Grab your left ankle with your left hand.

2. Put your right hand behind your head

3. Touch your elbow to your knee repetitively

4. Remember you're the king.

 

[Ruin]

Try to persuade the scientists to join in the revelry, but they are a somber lot.

Me: How you doing, "Alchem-Miss"?

Her: Please mind the beakers and retorts. You've already shattered several with your... dancing.

Expel the lot of them from the cave. They're just upset that once I build the Great Library, I won't have to learn anything for hundreds of years. Honestly, the prophetesses were a lot more fun.

---

Once they've gone, I fall back into melancholy. Monarchy didn't support as many troops as I thought it would. And many of them were needed for garrison duty, out of date, or both. My one productive city, Entremont, would be stuck building the Great Library rather than swordsmen. Had a number of warriors I could upgrade but each one cost two years of our GNP. And we couldn't sell Literature to raise money, in case someone else built the Library. We needed more cities, but only marshland was left. We needed a Golden Age. We needed...

---

"...a war!" I tell my assembled general staff.

"Save all that foolish dancing until after we've actually accomplished something," I snap. "Besides, it's undignified for men of your station. War is serious business. Now who should we fight?"

A general outlined the candidates: "Japan and China are too far away. Scandinavia has too many mountains impeding the siege engines we haven't built yet. Spain..."

"Hold your tongue! Spain is our greatest ally and most faithful trading partner."

The nerve! I would never commit an act of aggression against the fair Isabella, whom I'm trying to get Gracious with.

"Very well, sire. Thus Maya is the logical target, but to reach their border, our troops will have to pass through a narrow strip of Spanish land that juts into our territory. Perhaps a Right of Passage..."

What did you say? Let me see that map."

I study it intently.

"Why is half of it dark?" I grumble, before remembering the recent tragic suicides of my explorers.

"It really does jut doesn't it? Why would she put Valencia *there?* It's like she did it just to spite me. All right, a tiny war with the Spanish, but we'll do it honorably: No ROP funny business. A formal declaration of hostilities. No broken trade agreements. Isabella will barely object. Hell, maybe when it's all said and done she'll thank me for tidying up this cartographic nightmare.

550 BC

Of course we should. Another minor alteration to my play in this game is that usually I would use my first Great Leader to build an Army, and my second to rush the Forbidden Palace in an outlying but potentially decent city, such as my nearest rival's capital. This time I'm just building it in a second ring city to have it sooner.

(The other improvements/changes are:
1. Letting my capital oscillate between 6-4 rather than 3-1 when building settlers
2. Trading GPT for gold
3. Keeping my rep intact as long as reasonably possible)

 

[Ruin]

550 BC

My empire no longer fits on one map. At the far right we wave Bon Voyage to Exploration Adviser, onboard the Pirate Cum Galley (named in honor of @need my speed

My generals and I devise the above war plan: 1. Cross the Chicken Pig River 2. Commence our assault on the hill town of Valencia. I pledge to provide them with ten companies of Gallic Swordsmen and ten catapults. How will I pay for all this? I decide to consult my economic advisor.

He presents me with a Five Point Economic Plan, which I read aloud while he waits patiently:

1. Build troops.
2. Need more cities to support them.
3. Conquer cities.
4. Need more troops for wars.
5. Go to Point 1.
After five minutes or so, I start to get hoarse, but I think I've got the gist of it.

Me: This is genius! Where did you learn to be an economist?

Advisor: Actually, I'm self-taught. I used to be a clown in Alesia, but when Anarchy ended, I needed a new gig. Fortunately the two fields are closely related.

---

Unfortunately, there's not enough economist jobs for every unemployed clown in the kingdom, so I put them to work, ostensibly building "The Great Wall."

440 BC

Finally we discover Literature. Don't roll yet, because I want to see what we can get for it. Not that I would trade it of course, but it's a monopoly tech, so it should be extrordinarily valuable.

430 BC

Spain and Maya will both give us Code of Laws and Currency in exchange for Literature and 24 GPT and 46 gold. I don't even need to check with the Economic Advisor to tell them to forget it. I'm not going to pay them all my money to teach me about money!

Trade Monarchy to the Chinese for Code of Laws and 7 gold. Now Spain will give us Currency for Literature, 52 gold and 3 GPT. No thanks, I'll learn it from the Library, which we'll have done in only... 24 turns. Roll Republic. Half the workers in the kingdom begin mining Entremont's farmlands and then getting inside the city walls when they're done. The other half start building a very suspicious road that leads from Ratae Coratorium directly to Valencia.

RIP Exploration Advisor.

390 BC

Cultural Advisor: You want to rename Granny's Chicken's Pigs?

Me: Yes, to Granny Chicken's Pigs.

Cultural Advisor: ...

Me: Prince Brennus Jr was very upset about the misspelling.

310 BC

Continue building the Great Library, training troops, and not learning The Republic.

Let my daughter, the princess, name a town because she was jealous of her brother.

Spy on Valencia. Two spearmen and two catapults. Should be a piece of cake.