Dating Help: Should i blog ??

Ramius75

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May 5, 2003
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Sing City
Ok, am desperate for help here.

Im interested in a girl lately and notsure of her feeling to me. She started a blog recently and asked me to make one too, so that she can link her blog to mine and vice versa. very soon, im writing almost everyday.

now i need some professional helps. preferbly, casanovas, females, married men.
To comment on my blog. am i revealing too much ? or should i continue bloggin, just becoz she wants me too.

Thanks !!

http://ramiuslim.blogspot.com/
 
What is the address of your blog?

You need that if you want people to take a looka at it :)
 
Blogging will not help you get a girl, unless the sole purpose of your blog is to contain love poems, songs, writings, etc, directed at her. But even then, a blog will not do much. If you are unsure of her feelings towards you, a better thing to do would be to talk to her about it. This is a difficult thing to do, but just do it, and you will be better off regardless of her answer.
 
I'm not married and not a woman... I wouldn't really call myself a casanova either, but here goes.

If you want to get into her heart, not just into her pants (and I really hope it's the former) you should start by making good friends with her. Go out of your way to be there for her when something goes wrong (it will happen sooner or later). Of course, don't ever actually say that you only want to be friends with her! It's a subconscious boolean switch that you don't want to flick ;) (what I mean is, if you give her the idea you're not interested in anything more than friendship, she won't come onto you and, well, you obviously want her to).

Edit 1: Just to clarify, I don't have anything against you wanting to get into her pants as such, only that that should not be your primary motive :)
 
Pasi Nurminen said:
Blogging will not help you get a girl, unless the sole purpose of your blog is to contain love poems, songs, writings, etc, directed at her. But even then, a blog will not do much. If you are unsure of her feelings towards you, a better thing to do would be to talk to her about it. This is a difficult thing to do, but just do it, and you will be better off regardless of her answer.

well, she actually the one that got me to bloggin with her.(else i will never start one) , however, i found that bloggin is actually quite fun and so i keep writing and writing more often.

but now that im aware that she is reading, should i write so much and reveal too much of myself to her?
 
Ren said:
I'm not married and not a woman... I wouldn't really call myself a casanova either, but here goes.

If you want to get into her heart, not just into her pants (and I really hope it's the former) you should start by making good friends with her. Go out of your way to be there for her when something goes wrong (it will happen sooner or later). Of course, don't ever actually say that you only want to be friends with her! It's a subconscious boolean switch that you don't want to flick ;) (what I mean is, if you give her the idea you're not interested in anything more than friendship, she won't come onto you and, well, you obviously want her to).

Edit 1: Just to clarify, I don't have anything against you wanting to get into her pants as such, only that that should not be your primary motive :)

Am already doing that, but she still prove to be very elusive. i think she knows more about me than i know about her.

Looking for a long term relationship here, so the pants can wait. ;)
 
Ramius75 said:
but now that im aware that she is reading, should i write so much and reveal too much of myself to her?

Write nothing that you would not feel comfortable discussing with her or telling her face to face. Also, write nothing that you would not feel comfortable your immediate community (school, family, work, etc) knowing, as it is a publicly viewable site, and even if you tell only one person about it, word spreads about that sort of thing like wildfire.
 
Pasi Nurminen said:
Write nothing that you would not feel comfortable discussing with her or telling her face to face. Also, write nothing that you would not feel comfortable your immediate community (school, family, work, etc) knowing, as it is a publicly viewable site, and even if you tell only one person about it, word spreads about that sort of thing like wildfire.

ya, im aware that im writing for her also. so i try to avoid alot of things that i should be writing. which may make me look very pretentious... :blush:
 
pretentious, gay, take your pick. honestly, most blogs are a load of wank. i really don't see the point. better to keep a journal, maybe share some stuff you want to with her. generate some mystery rather than posting a heap of crap on a blog site. blogging just because she wants you to is no reason to do it.
 
bobgote said:
pretentious, gay, take your pick. honestly, most blogs are a load of wank. i really don't see the point. better to keep a journal, maybe share some stuff you want to with her. generate some mystery rather than posting a heap of crap on a blog site. blogging just because she wants you to is no reason to do it.

well, i tend to be very honest when i blog, nothing is fake inside, but i do agreed on the mystery part, and thats why i need some opinion here.

Im also trying to please her as i think she asked me to do that so that she can know me better too.

its at the dilemma whatever to reveal too much and make me vunerable or not to her game if she is playing it.
 
It depends though, but I rather emails or write a handwritten letter to her than posting somethings personal over a blog for everyone to see.

But it's a good motivation to write though, since I haven't update my blog for over a month now, because I know no one would be interested to read it.
 
i'd totally go with the letter idea. and even then, that's only if you're serious with this, and you know she's into it too.
 
Gr3yL3gion said:
It depends though, but I rather emails or write a handwritten letter to her than posting somethings personal over a blog for everyone to see.

But it's a good motivation to write though, since I haven't update my blog for over a month now, because I know no one would be interested to read it.


the blog is more indirect and need not have any purpose of writing things except those events in everyday life. Its not like im going to "report" to her 24/7. but more like sharing thoughts.
 
yeah, but that's relatively pointless isn't it. might as well just talk to her :\
 
bobgote said:
yeah, but that's relatively pointless isn't it. might as well just talk to her :\

Talk to her almost everyday. but then since she asked me to start writing, i think , why not ? lol.

but then there are always things that we dont talk about, let the things i feel inside me. So im asking if i shared too much info or not enough ?

Just need some opinions, thats all.
 
@Ramius75

But wouldn't it be easier to date her instead? Bring her to some cosy restaurant in Singapore rather than constantly leaving some encrypted messages over a blog.

I'm sure you know where you stand now in her world, it wouldn't hurt to be more direct if you are interested in her.

Maybe that's just me though, as I not the most patient person in the world.
 
Gr3yL3gion said:
@Ramius75

But wouldn't it be easier to date her instead? Bring her to some cosy restaurant in Singapore rather than constantly leaving some encrypted messages over a blog.

I'm sure you know where you stand now in her world, it wouldn't hurt to be more direct if you are interested in her.

Maybe that's just me though, as I not the most patient person in the world.

well, to be honest, thats the problem, i have trouble asking her for a one to one date, most often than not she will get her friends along. hate to admit it, but i sensing something wrong here. hence the insecure feeling.

i know not where i stand.
 
Ramius75 said:
Talk to her almost everyday. but then since she asked me to start writing, i think , why not ? lol.

but then there are always things that we dont talk about, let the things i feel inside me. So im asking if i shared too much info or not enough ?

Just need some opinions, thats all.

Well, only write them when you interested, and the info can be private in some blogs settings to prevent strangers from reading it.
 
Ramius75 said:
well, to be honest, thats the problem, i have trouble asking her for a one to one date, most often than not she will get her friends along. hate to admit it, but i sensing something wrong here. hence the insecure feeling.

i know not where i stand.

Just ask her then, once you know where you stand you'll know whether or not to stay or move on.

Group dating is normal, just invite some of your male friends along to distract all your obstacles.
 
Gr3yL3gion said:
Well, only write them when you interested, and the info can be private in some blogs settings to prevent strangers from reading it.

i dont mind sharing with strangers since there isnt any impact. wouldnt want to make it that hard to read too.
 
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