FFD leader assassinated!
In a stunning development recently, FFD leader Deiss was gunned down yesterday when driving his mint 91 LeBaron convertible to a press conference. Whether or not he was killed by a lone gunman or a SPP conspiracy is unknown at this time. However, this reporter is leaning towards the latter.
Q&A
Q. Who will take Deiss place as leader of the FFD?
A. Members of the FFD are screaming for blood.
Q. ...And??
A. Well, this means that *cough* a military commander taking control of the FFD is plausible.
Q. Anyone in particular?
A. Yes.
Q. ...
A. ...
Q. ...and who would that be?
A. Oh. Colonel-General Reiss is a decorated officer and Chief of Staff of the FFDA, and a fiery orator with strong pro-Denmark sentiments.
Q. Whats the process for choosing a new leader?
A. Well, at this point, its whoever survives the longest. Which is why everyone is worried that Reiss showing interest in the position may spark more bloodshed.
Q. How soon can we expect retribution for the assassination of FFD chairman Deiss?
A. Given that the military ability of the FFD is slightly above that of the AARP, I would not bet on a military response any time soon.
Q. Thank you.
A. It is General Reiss you should be thanking; he will save us all from the evils of....[Note to self: flip a coin to insert capitalism or communism here.]
Colonel-General Reiss will hold a press conference shortly.