I don't generally see a win before turn 200 even playing on Emperor. On Immortal and Deity, I have a hard time getting there before 250, and I'm frequently within a few turns of losing. If you're used to cutting off a city or two then suing for peace while you rebuild, then the loyalty mechanism can be punishing. It forces us weaker players to think a little harder about our wars and how to cut an enemy nation in such a way as to not constantly lose our gains. Best not to evaluate a mechanic in terms of how it's managed by the top .01% of players.
I see your point.
I apologize if my post offended you or anyone else.
This version of Civ seems so easy compared to others IMO that is.
I have read many of your posts. IMO I am surprised that you struggle.
Settings and Certain Rules can cause a gap in comparison.
My games are usually Deity/Stand/Pang which seems the most difficult for Loyalty problems.
I like the mechanic.
I just don't think it is punishing enough.
My math is probably off but I would think it is 3% of players compared to .01%.
The times I notice when I struggle boils down to two main problems.
Some other minor problems as well.
1. I am not concentrating on settlers.
This means I have stopped focusing on them because I have fallen into some sort of builder mode.
2. I have stopped building Army.
This is usually because I am lazy, feel I have enough and have fallen into some sort of builder mode.
3. I am not focusing on Era Score.
Golden Ages seem to fix any Loyalty Issues.
4. The Average Player always falls into the Wonder Building Trap.
They want all the Wonders. I have seen that issue with most versions of Civ.
5. I am trying to find the perfect location for each city.
I notice that keeping cities in a tight cluster works better.
6. I wasn't building the Colosseum.
Seems easy enough on Deity.
I am not very good but I get this up around turn 85 to 95 in most games.
I think better players get it up faster.
7. I am not playing Nice.
I find it easier to Forward the AI if I play nice and become Friends while I expand.
Using my Friends to gang up on the Enemy.
This could be a rule you don't employ but getting the AI to join your war seems to help.
8. Players are insisting on Holy Sites and Religion.
I find that this is very situational in my games.
I find that it isn't as safe as focusing on Military, Culture or Science.
Fun, but can cause all sorts of early problems if you aren't in an ideal situation.
9. I am watching too many Youtube/Twitch players do things wrong but don't realize it.
As
@Victoria has already stated all of this information is in her guide.