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SGOTM 9 - Smurkz
- Thread starter AlanH
- Start date
CommandoBob
AbstractArt
The spaceship was mostly on autopilot now and almost complete. Of the six advisors that had started only one was left to finish up. Somewhat by default, CommandoBob was Acting Captain of the SS Smurkz. Not a bad job, but a bit dull.
Until the intruder alarms went off.
Leaving his game of spider solitaire, CommandoBob rushed to the security section of the bridge and quickly began entering commands in an attempt to locate the intruder. He autolocked the doors to the area and armed interior defensive weaponry as he narrowed down on where the intruder was located. In just a few seconds his blood ran cold. The intruder, all three of them, were on the bridge.
Over the sounds of the sirens and alerts he heard some rustling behind him and slowly began to turn around, wondering if his sidearm was still in safe-mode and how long it would take to un-safe it and if he could un-safe it before he was dead.
BOOM!
‘Aggh!’ cried CommandoBob as he jumped onto the slanted console and then lost his balance as he tried to turn around and draw his weapon. Time seemed to slow down as he fell to the ground with a large thud. He lay still to await his doom and prayed it would be quick.
Instead of kicks and punches his doom consisted of three men who were convulsed with silent laughing. Silent only briefly, they began to chortle and bray once they could take a deep breath.
‘Oh, that was priceless. Exquisite. Can we do that again?’ gasped one, who held a busted brown paper bag in his hand.
‘I haven’t had such a good laugh since Scoutsout lost an army to a culture flip!’ said the other.
‘What, what I want to know, oh my’ wheezed the third in a voice strangely familiar, ‘is where is Niklas? I left him in charge of this. Who are you? And what year is it?’
‘I’m-m-m Co-o-mando Bob, sir. Niklas isn’t here right now.’
‘Why not?’ roared the third one, with a full red beard and long flowing red hair.
‘Ragnar Lodbrok, he thinks he is English, along with ControlFreak and zyxy. I don’t think he will be back.’
‘And being English is better than being my chief advisor?’
‘Well, sir, this didn’t work out as we had hoped. We got India to build the Apollo Program but then we could not get them to build space ship parts. We built this space ship just to make them jealous, but all Gandhi would do was pollute his land. We’ve been cleaning up his waste for the last 200 years or so. He has two space ship parts and that is only because we tricked him. We let him start building something like the Manhattan Project, let get most of the way there, then we would build that same thing with a leader and all Gandhi could do was convert that build into a space ship part or buy an expensive temple. But that only worked twice and then we were out of wonders.
‘Now all we do is keep India’s troops marching back and forth between some empty spots on our frontiers. We move and open a gap, or so it seems, and India moves troops to exploit that gap. We close the gap, which opens another gap, and the troops move to the other gap. India has not learned that only two gaps are open at one time and that the gaps are in the same place each time. Sometimes India leaves stragglers and we redline them just to have something to do.
‘So this hasn’t been all the fun and excitement we had hoped for. Once India got the Apollo Program it has been anticlimactic.’
‘When did India build Apollo?’ asked Ragnar.
‘In 1690 AD.’
‘And what year is it now?’
‘It just turned 2050 AD.’
‘Okay, Co-o-mando Bob, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to end this here and now. I’ve checked with the others and no one else was able to get India to build the Apollo Program before the Smurkz Team did.’
The second man spoke up and stepped forward.
‘I’m AlanH, and I’m here to officially declare Team Smurkz as the winners of the Gold Laurels for SGOTM 9.’
The first man now spoke.
‘I’m Gyathaar, and I’m here to present you with this Gold Laurel medallion to wear at all times to commemorate your victory and endurance in getting India, well, if not to the stars, at least to the launching pad.’
‘Uh, gee thanks, Gyathaar, but how can I wear a medallion online? Can you stick into a PDF or Word file so that I can print it off and show it to my wife?’
‘If you promise to change your user title to something a little more uplifting than SGOTM 09 Survivor.'
‘Why, seven months and two days are not long enough for a game of the month?’ quipped CommandoBob. Then he saw the hurt look on Gyathaar’s face.
‘Never mind, I’ll change it.’
Ragnar now spoke up again. ‘So Niklas is gone. Too bad. I had a song for him.’
‘Not the stomp-stomp-clap song?’ asked AlanH.
‘No, not from Queen. From another group, an English group, which is somewhat fitting since Niklas thinks he is English. A group of four boys from a place called Liverpool. They wrote a song about a brightly colored underwater vessel. My version goes like this:
In the game that we have played,
With Gandhi and his own sea,
Where he fought us all his life,
But never had the victory.
So we learned to chart the stars
Till we found a special place,
And we made it our life’s goal,
To send Gandhi into space.
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
And the teams were all aboard,
Many more of them just a lurk,
And the turns began to fly.
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
Now we’re at the turns of ease,
We can win whene’er we please (whene’er we please)
The game is done (game is done), we’ve run the race (run the race) ,
To send Gandhi into space, (into space)
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space.
Until the intruder alarms went off.
Leaving his game of spider solitaire, CommandoBob rushed to the security section of the bridge and quickly began entering commands in an attempt to locate the intruder. He autolocked the doors to the area and armed interior defensive weaponry as he narrowed down on where the intruder was located. In just a few seconds his blood ran cold. The intruder, all three of them, were on the bridge.
Over the sounds of the sirens and alerts he heard some rustling behind him and slowly began to turn around, wondering if his sidearm was still in safe-mode and how long it would take to un-safe it and if he could un-safe it before he was dead.
BOOM!
‘Aggh!’ cried CommandoBob as he jumped onto the slanted console and then lost his balance as he tried to turn around and draw his weapon. Time seemed to slow down as he fell to the ground with a large thud. He lay still to await his doom and prayed it would be quick.
Instead of kicks and punches his doom consisted of three men who were convulsed with silent laughing. Silent only briefly, they began to chortle and bray once they could take a deep breath.
‘Oh, that was priceless. Exquisite. Can we do that again?’ gasped one, who held a busted brown paper bag in his hand.
‘I haven’t had such a good laugh since Scoutsout lost an army to a culture flip!’ said the other.
‘What, what I want to know, oh my’ wheezed the third in a voice strangely familiar, ‘is where is Niklas? I left him in charge of this. Who are you? And what year is it?’
‘I’m-m-m Co-o-mando Bob, sir. Niklas isn’t here right now.’
‘Why not?’ roared the third one, with a full red beard and long flowing red hair.
‘Ragnar Lodbrok, he thinks he is English, along with ControlFreak and zyxy. I don’t think he will be back.’
‘And being English is better than being my chief advisor?’
‘Well, sir, this didn’t work out as we had hoped. We got India to build the Apollo Program but then we could not get them to build space ship parts. We built this space ship just to make them jealous, but all Gandhi would do was pollute his land. We’ve been cleaning up his waste for the last 200 years or so. He has two space ship parts and that is only because we tricked him. We let him start building something like the Manhattan Project, let get most of the way there, then we would build that same thing with a leader and all Gandhi could do was convert that build into a space ship part or buy an expensive temple. But that only worked twice and then we were out of wonders.
‘Now all we do is keep India’s troops marching back and forth between some empty spots on our frontiers. We move and open a gap, or so it seems, and India moves troops to exploit that gap. We close the gap, which opens another gap, and the troops move to the other gap. India has not learned that only two gaps are open at one time and that the gaps are in the same place each time. Sometimes India leaves stragglers and we redline them just to have something to do.
‘So this hasn’t been all the fun and excitement we had hoped for. Once India got the Apollo Program it has been anticlimactic.’
‘When did India build Apollo?’ asked Ragnar.
‘In 1690 AD.’
‘And what year is it now?’
‘It just turned 2050 AD.’
‘Okay, Co-o-mando Bob, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to end this here and now. I’ve checked with the others and no one else was able to get India to build the Apollo Program before the Smurkz Team did.’
The second man spoke up and stepped forward.
‘I’m AlanH, and I’m here to officially declare Team Smurkz as the winners of the Gold Laurels for SGOTM 9.’
The first man now spoke.
‘I’m Gyathaar, and I’m here to present you with this Gold Laurel medallion to wear at all times to commemorate your victory and endurance in getting India, well, if not to the stars, at least to the launching pad.’
‘Uh, gee thanks, Gyathaar, but how can I wear a medallion online? Can you stick into a PDF or Word file so that I can print it off and show it to my wife?’
‘If you promise to change your user title to something a little more uplifting than SGOTM 09 Survivor.'
‘Why, seven months and two days are not long enough for a game of the month?’ quipped CommandoBob. Then he saw the hurt look on Gyathaar’s face.
‘Never mind, I’ll change it.’
Ragnar now spoke up again. ‘So Niklas is gone. Too bad. I had a song for him.’
‘Not the stomp-stomp-clap song?’ asked AlanH.
‘No, not from Queen. From another group, an English group, which is somewhat fitting since Niklas thinks he is English. A group of four boys from a place called Liverpool. They wrote a song about a brightly colored underwater vessel. My version goes like this:
In the game that we have played,
With Gandhi and his own sea,
Where he fought us all his life,
But never had the victory.
So we learned to chart the stars
Till we found a special place,
And we made it our life’s goal,
To send Gandhi into space.
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
And the teams were all aboard,
Many more of them just a lurk,
And the turns began to fly.
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
Now we’re at the turns of ease,
We can win whene’er we please (whene’er we please)
The game is done (game is done), we’ve run the race (run the race) ,
To send Gandhi into space, (into space)
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space,
We all tried to send Gandhi into space,
Gandhi into space, Gandhi into space.
AVN
Deity
Congratulations 
It was a pleasure to read this story once we (the Peanuts) had finished our own game a few months ago.
It was a pleasure to read this story once we (the Peanuts) had finished our own game a few months ago.
zyxy
Warmongering Fool
Great story! For a moment I feared for your life there 
.
You should really post this in the spoiler thread!
.You should really post this in the spoiler thread!
ControlFreak
Not An Addict, Really
Excellent CB! Yes, please post in the spoiler thread.
"Sky of blue, and sea of green.
In our yellow submarine...."
Well, I know what I'll be humming the rest of the day.CommandoBob said:
"Sky of blue, and sea of green.
In our yellow submarine...."
I'm been humming too...Great job finishing up, great job with the spoiler. Thanks again all for this game.
@AVN: Thanks a lot, and good luck with 10.
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