The CiV Facepalm Thread

[basta]

No kiddies, it's not the CiV Facebook thread, search again!

Ok, we've all got our "favorite" moments of CiV madness--let's collect them here and when the mods finally close the thread, we can send a big, sweet-smelling bouquet to the CiV devs for the New Year!

I'll start with my own top three (copied from other posts, but nonetheless all true):

1) I once brought Gandhi back from the dead, gave him 3 unwanted cities, and in thanks he DoW'ed me 20 turns later. Gandhi, mind you. Nobel Peace Prize winner. OK, it was immortal and I was far ahead and it was time for the endgame dogpile, but really! Talk about broken diplo! Anyway, the second time he stayed dead.

2) I once liberated a CS in a war against Alex, and the next turn it started bombarding my units. I opened the city screen and it read "Friends", bright blue bar, and "What do you want here, you bloodthirsty tyrant?"

3)One early immortal game I was dissed by England on turn 12 when their scout appeared and Lizzie told me my economy was pathetic. I wasn't in the mood and DoW'ed her same turn, killed the scout and a few turns later a warrior, didn't even find London, kept on scouting and 20 turns later Lizzie sued for peace and I got 30 turns silver, the city of Hastings and 420 gold.

 

[Jon the Bastard]

Okay, here's mine:

1.) Montezuma was warmongering, as he usually does, and eventually he had wiped out his neighbor. Well, it wasn't long thereafter that the entire world declared war on him. I get a notice on the right side of the screen saying that the Aztec lost their capital. I scroll down to the bottom of the screen where Montezuma had his empire situated and saw that the civilization that took his capital was actually a city-state, the city state of Seoul. Seoul went on to take one of his other cities too, thus growing their empire to three cities. I have yet to see a city-state with three cities again.

2.) I was playing a game as France and my neighbor, the Chinese, asked for a Declaration of Friendship - I accepted. The next turn Oda Nobunaga came up and said that he too was friends with the Chinese and hoped that something would "come from this makeshift alliance." The next turn he denounced China and declared war on me.

 

[wurstburst]

I was fighting Siam. Wiped out 95% of his cities. Decimated his armies. Nuked him probably 10 times. Had just taken his capital.

He had 49,000 gold in the bank. He gave me the old "I know when I'm staring defeat in the face". I asked him for 1 gold to get peace. ONE. He said I was being completely unfair and that I needed to be reasonable.

 

[Kyroshill]

wurstburst HATES Siam

 

[ryantherenegade]

My best one has to be the game I played as the Iraquois - huge map, tiny islands, marathon (wanted a challenge), to find 390 turns of exploring into the game that the world was in fact one large continent.
Just to be sure, I checked the settings, but I had indeed clicked "tiny islands" - how it came to create a Pangea I'm still not sure.

 

[wurstburst]

wurstburst HATES Siam

Is it getting old? I'll find a new object for my hatred. Promise.

 

[basta]

I was fighting Siam. Wiped out 95% of his cities. Decimated his armies. Nuked him probably 10 times. Had just taken his capital.

He had 49,000 gold in the bank. He gave me the old "I know when I'm staring defeat in the face". I asked him for 1 gold to get peace. ONE. He said I was being completely unfair and that I needed to be reasonable.

I hope, following proper AI etiquette, that you then offered Ramalamadingdong all cities but your capital in exchange.

 

[Kyroshill]

Is it getting old? I'll find a new object for my hatred. Promise.

No worries.... pre-patch I had it bad for Hiawatha

http://forums.civfanatics.com/showthread.php?t=400047

 

[Redoubts]

Watching Elizabeth go out of her way to avoid settling coastal cities.