Babylonian Idol! [RFC-UHV-OMG?]

ACT 12 ( Or ACT 11-B )​
...
<:old:> :mad:
<Ishtar> Spirit of the great Apil-Sin!! Is that you?
<Hammurabi> Grampa!! :eek:

<:old:> Yes Hammurabi... it is I, Grampa, and I am most displeased...
<Hammurabi> But Grampa...
<:old:> NO BUTS!! Now can you tell me what the hell is going on here Hammurabi!? Just when I was starting to believe you were actually a half capable ruler, it appears you can't even keep your most immediate subordinates under control?
<Guy at the back> :eek2:
<Hammurabi> But Grampa! I had everything under control! It was just a spontaneous accident!
<:old:> Certainly did not look like it when I arrived and this guy was destroying the palace! Seriously, what sort of lunatic madmen do you take for advisors these days, Hammurabi?!

*Grampa sends a murderous stare to the guy at the back*

<Guy at the back> Forgive me for my sins!! :bowdown: I am sorry, sorry... I am so unworthy! Please do not punish m-
<:old:> SHUTUP!!!! SHUT YOUR BLEEDING PIE HOLE!! I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU WORM!!!
<Guy at the back> *adopts fetal position* Eeeeeeeekkk!!!! Eeeeeeeeek!!!

*Meanwhile in the Pantheon*
<Gods> :lol:
<Odin> Go Enlil Go!!! :D
*Back on earth*

<:old:> Now, Hammurabi, before I get sick with disgust, let me tell you what you are expected to do at this point... You actually managed to discover writing before anyone else...I am ALMOST impressed, but this will not be worth a horse dung if you fail the following steps. You need to start working on your popularity now, also known as culture... It is crucial that you start working on it now or you will FAIL!
<Hammurabi> Fail!? :eek:
<:old:> Yes, and if you fail, you'd better believe me when I tell you that you will be even sorrier than this guy here!
<Guy at the back> *fetal position* Eeeeek! Eeeeeek! Eeeeek!
<Hammurabi> I am listening Grampa!
<:old:> To win the culture race, you will need to use the technique known as WonderSpam, or those wacky Indians will beat you at it, they are already building temples all over the place.
<Hammurabi> WonderSpam?!? :confused:
<:old:> Yeah, the idea is simply to build all sorts of huge and grandiose monuments. Then everyone around will go "Ohhh!!!" and "Ahhh!!!" when they look at Babylon and the gods will be happy.
<Hammurabi> Oh! I know how to do that! You just leave it to me :D
<:old:> Good. Do not disappoint me.
<Ishtar> I have complete faith in Hammurabi! He is a wonderful leader.
<:old:> heh... Is that all you Puny advisors are good for?
<Hammurabi> Fear not, I won't disappoint you Grampa, I promise!
<:old:> Alright... Since you are behaving nice now, I will give you another advice. You need to research a way to properly use the rock deposits at the east of the city. It will make building much easier. We call this masonry and there are two paths to reach it. The path of mysticism is the right one for you. It will also set you on the way of WonderSpamming.
<Hammurabi> Got it!
<:old:> Good, once the mystic ways of the gods have taught you the secret of masonry, start meditating on all you have done and I will come back to you. Meditation should also help instill some self control and other desirable qualities in this less than stellar fellowship that you have here...

*Grampa looks at the guy at the back*

<:old:> I can't say I am particularly impressed with the lot of them, they have not done much for the advancement of this nation so far...
<Ishme> But that is not true!! Some of us are working very hard! Look, I even wrote a story today!
<:old:> Uh...? :dubious:

*Ishme hands over the stone tablet.*
Spoiler :
VmPBX.jpg

<:old:> *reads* *chuckle* *reads some more* Hehehe! Hey this is pretty good! Well, I gotta say I was wrong, some of you are actually productive! Keep it up my boy, you will go far!
<Ishme> :D

*The guy at the back suddenly snaps out of it and jumps back to his feet*

-Continuing on next post-
 
<Guy at the back> WHAT DID YOU SAY? :mad:
<:old:> Uh...? :hmm:
<Guy at the back> SERIOUSLY WHATS GOING ON HERE!? ARE YOU REALLY PRAISING THIS DIMWIT FOR WRITING THIS WACKY STORY?
<:old:> Well it's a pretty good story actually, I think you sh-
<Guy at the back> AAAaaaRgHHH!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!! I MUST BE DREAMING! ITS A FREAKING NIGHTMARE!!

<Hammurabi> :facepalm:
<Ishtar> For our sake please calm down!!! You are in the presence of a divine messenger!

<Guy at the back> DIVINE!? ALL I SEE HERE IS A PRESUMPTUOUS LEVITATING OLD FART WHO THINKS HE'S BETTER THAN THE LOT OF US!! IS THAT YOUR DEFINITION OF DIVINE??
<:old:> Mortal! You'd better stop this circus before an accident happens!
<Guy at the back> WHaT!?!! ARE YOU THREATENING ME YOU WACKY OLD BAG OF GAS?!!!
<:old:> IN THE NAME OF THE PANTHEON CONTAIN YOURSELF OR BE PUNISHED!!
<Guy at the back> THAT'S IT I HAD ENOUGH!! IM GONNA RIP YOUR FRIGGIN BEARD OFF!!! WAAAaaaRgHHH!!!

*Guy at the back lunges forward*

<:old:> :eek: !!!

*Guy at the back swings wooden chair at Grampa*
*Grampa dodges*
*Chair explodes on marble column*
*Meanwhile in the Pantheon

<Gods>
Rofl_4c.gif

<Hunab Ku>
Rofl_3c.gif


*Back on earth*

<Hammurabi> Stop it you fool!! :eek:
<Guy at the back> *Rips shirt off* *Pulsating veins over bulging muscles* AAAaaaRgHHH!!

*Grampa casts ICE SHARDS*
*Guy at the back tumble-rolls on the floor*
*Wall is pelted with ice*

<Ishtar> *Hides behind furniture*
<Ishme> :run:
<Hammurabi> GUARDS!! HELP!!

*Meanwhile in YU HUANG'S palace*

<Yu Huang> :popcorn:

*Back on earth*

<Guy at the back> BURN DEMON!!! *Grabs torch from the wall and swings at Grampa*

*Grampa flies aside but beard catches afire*

<:old:> WAAAaaaaarghhhh!!! :eek: *douses the flames in panic*

*Grampa casts WATER BUBBLE, Guy at the back is drenched and torch is extinguished*
*Guy at the back drops cold torch and grabs splintered table leg, lunges forward and swings*

<:old:> :eek: *crouches*

*Suddenly, a bunch of guards crashes through the doors*

<Hammurabi> Guards! Stop him!!!
<Ishme> :run:

*Guards pile atop Ishme*

<Hammurabi> NOOO!!! NOT HIM!!!! :wallbash:

*Guy at the back swings with club*
*Grampa blocks with wooden cane*
*Guards are confused :shifty: *
*Grampa escapes through the window*

<Guy at the back> AAAaaaRgHHH!!! *Throws weapon in frustration*

*Meanwhile in the Pantheon

<Gods>
Rofl_4c.gif

<Jupiter> Please Please Please!!! Make it stop!!! This is killing me!! :rofl: :lmao:

*Meanwhile in YU HUANG'S palace*

<Yu Huang> :clap:

*Back on earth, Amata wakes up*

<Amata> Hnnnnngg... What happened? Did I miss anything?
...
...to be continued...

END OF ACT 12​
 
Rofl_3c.gif


It took me a bit to realize this wasn't on here normally.
 
Well Thanks guys :D

And about Ishme's story, you need to understand that it is very very old. One of the very first written work of mankind. Sadly the text has been lost through the ages and its existence only persists as a legend... But who knows, maybe someday an archeologist will recover the stone tablet and translate it :p
 
:clap: You definitely deserved that S&T Award.
Click to expand...
I wholeheartedly agree with this statement. :goodjob:
 
Rofl_3c.gif

^^^^Use this one^^^^^
 
My reaction at act 12:

:lmao:
 
Ok guys, please don't be shocked but ill be putting this story on the hiatus for a short while.

Its just that im not comfortable with having to update 3 stories simultaneously.
I feel the delay between updates gets a little too long. However, RandomLand is nearing ending and i don't think it will take that many updates before it is finished.

Then i will be working on Babylonian Idol and North Korea and try to refrain from starting a new one. ( problem is im having lots of cool ideas for stories )

Fans of the story, Ill still give you a little something to nibble at in the meantime though:
In the next Act, the Guy at the back is sent to the dungeon and wont be coming out until he learns how to write and makes a letter of sorriness to Grampa.
Which means he may be in there for a while :lol:

And thats not all! I just made a small overhaul to the story.
All the first acts now have the Bolded Character names that have become a trademark of my stories, and also there is a table of content with link in the first post. So if any of you feels like rereading the acts, you are in for a smooth and hassle free experience :)

Now time to go work on the Kim-Jong-il update! See you there :D
 
*Gets a heart-attack*

No, I'm kidding. Go finish your other stories first ;)
 
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