FUNNY! Politically Incorrect Unique Units!

Chris
No, you are not. You are just a victim of the so-called "CNN Wonder".

Islamic people are not as violent and stupid as you may think. :confused:

In fact, they just become hot in the media as a trouble-maker after the WWs and Cold War. My impresion of them is very different from yours (but as bad as yours): man can have several women at the same time without big trouble. (while I still don't know how to manage one woman!!!)
 
unit : journalist

requires resource large heaps of bull****

makes all content citizens unhappy in all cities due to searching out bad news stories.
 
European Union : The first two Civs wich build this wonder are forming a union, but remain separate. The corruption rate increases one level due to the burocracy. The civs must be european.

After the EU the following small wonders can be built:

Common Agricultural Policy: The food production increases by 1 each tile. Civs must pay 1 gold for each food producted. Americans became angry.

Development Funds: The gold production of the richer civs are halved, and makes one happy citizen content in every city. The workers rate and production of cities become faster in poorer civs, and corruption increases.

Schengen Teatry: Makes harder for illegal immigrant units to enter the territory of the Union from outside the union. However if they are inside they can cross internal borders without any difficulty.

Common Currency (Euro): The gold production increases by 1 in each city. Makes one content citizen unhappy, because of the loss of the good old national currency.

Enviromental Policy: Workers can't chop down forests. Cities can't build power plants of any kind, and all existing plants are destroyed. Civs can build units wich require oil without oil resource.

etc.. There are many additional small wonders, but they must be created.

If a civ has the wonder European Union, and does not builds one of the a small wonders mentioned above, it will loose all benefits gained from the EU wonders, because of the crisis of the Union. (The backwards remain, of course.)

Any civs want to join the Union later must buid a small wonder called Accesion Negotiations. During the time the civ building the wonder, it must give to the civs already in EU everything they want. If it does not, the all shields spent to the Accesion Negotiations are lost.

That's all for now.
 
Mad cow disease unit: Prequisite = European Union Wonder.
(0.0.1) moves randomly from city to city causing all production from cattle bonus tiles to cease, creating an unhappy citizen in affected city. Effects like pollution. Can be cleaned up by workers.

Animal Rights Activist Unit: (0.0.1): Prerequisite = Democratic or Republic Government. Indestructible. 10% chance of appearing in any city with both a university and hospital per turn. One unit per civilization. Negates 50% of the research effects of the university and research lab during the turn it is in that city. Targets metropolis. Can only be killed by switching to communism, monarchy, or despotism.

Strip Mall Wonder: Prerequisite = modern times & marketplace. 50% chance of automatically being built in any city under size 12. Only wonder that more than one is built. Causes three unhappy faces to appear due to: 1) local business being forced out of by chains; 2) traffic congestion on main streets. Reduces culture in city by 1. Costs 2 gold to maintain.
 
Originally posted by hagen
European Union : The first two Civs wich build this wonder are forming a union, but remain separate. The corruption rate increases one level due to the burocracy. The civs must be european.

After the EU the following small wonders can be built:

Common Agricultural Policy: The food production increases by 1 each tile. Civs must pay 1 gold for each food producted. Americans became angry.

Development Funds: The gold production of the richer civs are halved, and makes one happy citizen content in every city. The workers rate and production of cities become faster in poorer civs, and corruption increases.

Schengen Teatry: Makes harder for illegal immigrant units to enter the territory of the Union from outside the union. However if they are inside they can cross internal borders without any difficulty.

Common Currency (Euro): The gold production increases by 1 in each city. Makes one content citizen unhappy, because of the loss of the good old national currency.

Enviromental Policy: Workers can't chop down forests. Cities can't build power plants of any kind, and all existing plants are destroyed. Civs can build units wich require oil without oil resource.

etc.. There are many additional small wonders, but they must be created.

If a civ has the wonder European Union, and does not builds one of the a small wonders mentioned above, it will loose all benefits gained from the EU wonders, because of the crisis of the Union. (The backwards remain, of course.)

Any civs want to join the Union later must buid a small wonder called Accesion Negotiations. During the time the civ building the wonder, it must give to the civs already in EU everything they want. If it does not, the all shields spent to the Accesion Negotiations are lost.

That's all for now.

You should make it so every one of those makes the americans mad.
 
I can't believe this thread!!! It is wonderful!!!

How 'bout:

Disgruntled Jewish Lezbo (1/1/0): no, that would be wrong

Stupid Dirt Eating Kid (0/0/1): acts as a spy, lowers cultural influence

Squegie (spelling ?) Guy (0/0/1): slows down enemy movement by attempting to wash window of the Panzers

The Black Mexican (0/5/0): yep, I am going to die, but... spy that is only good for stealing things, yet there is a 4 in 5 chance that they become to lazy to do so and end up hanging out in that civ until you conquer the town you sent them to.

David Hasselhoff (0,2,6,9,200/2/5): the ultimate in American UU. The David Hasselhoff, while having little effect on certain countries is practiclly leathal against those civ's with little taste for music (i.e. Germany, Japan, England)... Countries like India, which has no taste, is unaffected. Countries like Russia, are doubly effected due to memories of Knight Ridder and Baywatch (no good looking Russians).

Andrew Lolyd Weber: British UU similar to David Hasselhoff, but everyone calls him Sir.

A Mime: French UU that increase relations with other civs... Heck, France is like a mime; better seen than heard.

********/Amazon: unit with 1(10 against men)/6/5 cannot join armies of mixed sex.

Car Bomber: Irish special unit, ussually dies in explosion because they where too drunk.

'nuff for now... I am going to hell for those.
 
Unit: Goth Kid (5/0/1)
Resource: Absinthe
Makes 2 citizens unhappy in any city it is located, 1 in 5 chance of becoming bored and offing itself. Too filled with a depressed malaise to defend itself, but pseudo-intellectual ramblings can consternate and bore other units to death.

Wonder: Experience Music Project
Makes Bach's cathedral obsolete. Decreases culture and taste of building civilization, but increases commerce in city built (best created using your Paul Allen great leader).

Wonder: Security and Exchange Commission (SEC)
Allows for overvaluation of stock market, and later collapse due to inability to regulate accounting practices. makes 1 citizen per city happy (corporate CEO's)
 
Originally posted by Gnarlyhotep
Wonder: Experience Music Project
Makes Bach's cathedral obsolete. Decreases culture and taste of building civilization, but increases commerce in city built (best created using your Paul Allen great leader).
:lol: :lol: :lol:

That is probably one of the most tasteless designed buildings I've seen. You forgot to mention that it adds one unhappy face for those citizens who can see the thing from their window or apartment.

Another one:

American UU: Berkeleyite (0.0.1) -- changes laws in community so that you can't get a decent cup of coffee unless it is organic & environmentally friendly coffee. Creates 4 unhappy faces due to higher coffee prices.

Berkeley Parking Patrol (0.0.1) -- overexhuberant at writing parking tickets. Negates tile bonus in democracy and republic. Creates tile penalty in monarchy and communism, due to people having to move their cars every two hours (no you can't feed the meter, they mark your tires) and spend an additional 20 minutes looking for a new parking place.
 
People's Park Wonder: Automatically built in city of Berkeley. Produces UU of Homeless at rate of 1 every two turns which require maintenance. Selling the wonder or attempting to move the homeless units throws entire city into civil disorder until wonder is rebuilt and homeless units are moved back to city.
 
it seems like people are really enjoying this thread, so let me add one more.

American
Warez Dood Trooper, 11/2/1, requirez Computerz and McDonald'z small wonder

- good offense due to l33t quake and counter-strike skillz and exceptional gripping power of right hand
- oober week defenze becauze of weak musclez
- whatever city da warez dood trooper iz stationed in stopz growing: high porno to sperm ratioz. upside iz that it doesn't need rubber az a rezource
- special ability: h4xoring, bringz in 1 gold per turn after infiltrating enemy noob citiz
- negatez library in city & decreasez l33teracy ratez
 
Originally posted by Myartar


No kidding. that pictoral makes me wish i worked at Enron! :eek: :eek: :goodjob:

err...u sure u want to work in Enron? wouldnt working at the publisher be a better appropriate choice IMO?:p
 
City improvment: School
Whenever a city's population grows, the new population becomes unhappy for 10 turns (until it reaches the age of 18).

New tech: T.V.
You cannot recruit any new units(no one wants to enroll).
Drafted units make twice as many citizens unhappy.

New unit: Drug Dealer 0/0/1
Any unit Drug Dealer attacks cannot take any action for 5 turns.
 
Corporate Executive - Units that you cannot control, but allow you to enter a golden age until two such units enter your capital. On the next turn, you will be attacked by barbarians and your Golden Age will not only end, but all of your commerce improvements will have a negative effect. Wall Street will cost you the lesser of 5% of your treasury or 50 gpt, banks & marketplaces will decrease commerce in a city by 50%, etc. Past Golden Age exploits of your two Corporate Executives now in the capital will make them ineffective in instituting reform. Consequences will last 4 to 8 turns depending on the ratio of your civs libraries and universities to its temples and cathedrals.
 
American UU-The Kennedy Family requires the small wonder mafia. Decreases population by making DUI and manslaughter legal. Decreases your reputation (Gno Din Diem), and increases coruption by 10%. Defenseless against assains, immune to police.
 
Here's some:

Fat Drunk: 0/0/0 Spy-- When sent to a city in another country it makes people pity him. Makes one unhappy citizen.

Bin Laden(don't think I spelt it correctly) 10/0/3 missle- When used it makes every country declare war on you. Can only be used once against the americans.
 
pharmacy,

Actually I've never watched CNN in my entire life. I'm Southern Baptist and from Texas. We're not very big fans of Muslims or CNN down here.

Regardless, I apologize for writing that little rant earlier. We come here to discuss our favorite game, not politics. I was just angry at something I had heard about Muslims in my Church and was taking out some of my agression.
 
American UU: Redneck- Attacks everything that looks, acts, sounds, or thinks differently then they do. Requires cathedral for religious zeal and requires no universities be built in order for unit to be built.
 
English - Egg, Chips and 2 Veg (requires steam power) **bombards** Upon use in an attack, automatically reduces average lifespan of victim pop in city by 10 years.

Russian vodka bottle unit (requires granary to build): generates revenue; bombards and temporarily removes 1-2 points from victims. After chemistry, can be upgraded to antifreeze bottle.

New Roman small wonder: vomitorium - can only be built in city with grapes/wine as a resource. Triples trade, but turns city into disease zone similar to jungle.

For Multi-Player Only: (requires postmodernism)
Aztec "SubCommandante Zero" Special Leader - can automatically take one city. Thereafter, does nothing but post random snippets of interviews on chat window, and gets featured in endless articles about how different the post-cold war world is. Appears in a colour different from original aztec color.

Iroqouis - Native Bureaucrat - can launch "treaty negotiation" attacks. Stalls unit for 10 turns or 50 years, whichever is the greater. Maintenance costs paid by civ that was most recently attacked by the unit.

Egypt - Cleo unit - topless, this anti-special leader unit can immediately draw in and attack GL's after they are created, and destroy or convert them with a "coitus" attack that is visible on the game screen. (okay, now we're moving from political incorrectness into just plain porn, so I will stop here...)

R.III
 
Originally posted by Richard III

Egypt - Cleo unit - topless, this anti-special leader unit can immediately draw in and attack GL's after they are created, and destroy or convert them with a "coitus" attack that is visible on the game screen. (okay, now we're moving from political incorrectness into just plain porn, so I will stop here...)

R.III

Instead of all this being visable, how about the GL just disappears into Thebes and the music turns to porno music, nothing more....
 
Originally posted by Myartar


Instead of all this being visable, how about the GL just disappears into Thebes and the music turns to porno music, nothing more....
yeah, very subtle. I like it!

Also lol@Egg, Chips and 2 veg unit :lol:
 
Back
Top Bottom