How important are uncels? To Nephews?

[bloodofages]

Sorry about my spelling. Very bad english and such. I have a new baby nephew! How important are uncles(Am i spelling that right?) Once again sorry for my poor spelling. What can a uncle do and not do? Can a uncle say something if the kid is not listeing? How much do you think a unlce should be in his nephews or niece's lifes? I really don't want to overstep my bounds as a uncle so i need some advice on being a uncle. My nephew does not have a father He killed himself 5 months ago. Also can you tell me if you think unlces are important or not. Please don't say it depends on the person cause i am also looking for your opions and some adivce from hopefully both a parent and any uncles out there. Thanks for your time.

 

[OrpheusPrime]

Depends on how much you're around your nephew. If you're around a lot, you'll have a lot of influence over the kid. Otherwise, probably not.

 

[GenMarshall]

Depends on how much you're around your nephew. If you're around a lot, you'll have a lot of influence over the kid. Otherwise, probably not.

As OP said, it realy depends on how much the child is around to his uncle.

 

[bloodofages]

So are you saying it really does not matter if they are in their nephews lifes? That they are really not important. So uncles are just the guy you see on holidays?

 

[Shadylookin]

I hope I'm not important to my nephew, If I am that kids doomed.

 

[bloodofages]

So being a uncle is nothing but a way of saying my mother's brother.

 

[OrpheusPrime]

If you're only seeing him on holidays.. you're the guy that he sees on holidays.

If you're the guy who comes around every day or week and plays with him, talks to him. You're a big influence and mentor.

Pretty simple.

 

[bombshoo]

I have uncles I am very close with, and ones who I have seen once or twice in my whole life, so I think you should want to be very close with him, and help out his mother (your sister or sister-in-law) whenever you can. Being a single mother is probably very hard. Volunteer to watch him, if she is out. If he knows you from a young age he should be very close to you naturally.

When he gets older (those teenage years), remember, no matter how close you are too him, you are NOT his father. This doesn't mean ignore his problems then, or anything, but he will probably want you to not be around as much, and you should respect this.

 

[OrpheusPrime]

I have 8 uncles, never was close to any of em (mostly because 5 lived in other countries). The other 3 were nice to me, but i ended up hating them because they were totally racist. (yay south georgia)

 

[bloodofages]

I am not going to try be his father. I had a uncle once who acted like it before, caused more trouble then good and haven't seen him in years.

 

[Gr3yL3gion]

I hope to be an uncle some day, but not a father.

 

[Imaginos]

Am sorry to hear about your nephew's father.
if you are going to be around the kid alot, then you could probably end up being a fatherly figure to him. someone he can look up to and turn to for advice and all that when he's older.
I feel being an uncle is very important, e.g, cos sometimes kids, prefer to talk about certain things with only their uncles and aunts and not with their parents. i was like that.
A few of my uncles were strong influences in my life. without them, i wouldn't be where i am now.

i have a nephew and a niece too, and if i don't see/play/talk to them for a few day's, i start to miss them. and it's very nice to see them grow up and develop. It also makes me feel younger and happier.

 

[WS78]

Am sorry to hear about your nephew's father.
if you are going to be around the kid alot, then you could probably end up being a fatherly figure to him. someone he can look up to and turn to for advice and all that when he's older.
I feel being an uncle is very important, e.g, cos sometimes kids, prefer to talk about certain things with only their uncles and aunts and not with their parents. i was like that.
A few of my uncles were strong influences in my life. without them, i wouldn't be where i am now.

i have a nephew and a niece too, and if i don't see/play/talk to them for a few day's, i start to miss them. and it's very nice to see them grow up and develop. It also makes me feel younger and happier.

Agree, just stay wary that you should give him some space once in a while. Maybe you should confer to his mother first, that would straighten out your part.

 

[stormbind]

I am a nephew. One of my uncles has the potential to be very influential (he is the most powerful man I know) plus he showed up at frequent intervals during my childhood and is quite a cool chap. My other uncles are largely unknown to me.

I am not an uncle.

 

[Cilpot]

My uncles are not that important to me. I have 9 of them and I have not had much to do with them in my life. The reasons are that theyre much older than me (30-50 years) and live scattered around the country.

However, I have four nephews. I am very active in all their lives and I believe and hope that I am an important person to them. At least I hope that they think I'm fun to be with

 

[Moss]

Just depends...some of my uncles I'm close to...and others I'm not.

My nephews are 3 and 2 weeks respectively...and I'm pretty close with them...and I'm around them quite often...but I guess it will all depend on whether I'm able to see them at the same rate as they get older as to how influential I am on their lives.

 

[Syterion]

Well if his father is dead and you have the potential to be close to him, why not? For me, growing up without a father(or father figure) wasn't what I would say really hard(my mother is amazing), but it wears on you when you want to learn how to shave, or at other awkward times in your life. My uncle is a great guy, but he lives in South Carolina and I see him maybe once a year if lucky. Losing a parent is a very traumatizing event, even if the baby never knew him, trust me(I never really knew my father, but he died when I was 9 or so)that he will still have pain from it, once in a while. Especially if his father killed himself.

Be there for the child if you can. For both the single mother and the child.

 

[Rambuchan]

I am an uncle and I see my nephew nearly every day. I greatly respect the role I have to play. I consider the role to be that of teacher, friend, mentor, guide and all of this is highlighted by the fact that uncles and aunts are effectively second parents.

 

[chancellor_dan]

My niece feels nothing but contempt and ridicule for me (she's 5).
I'm sure she would do the opposite of what ever i said.

 

[ligertiger]

A rehash of advice, just be cool with them. I have a couple of cousin nephews and play with them a lot. Yea, you'll probably be only visiting them on holidays or vice versa. But if you're a brother or sister uncle, then you might be a big influence because there might be a lot of visits. Just keep it cool, act like yourself and get their trust.