I hate Norway!

[Takhisis]

I used to hate Norway, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

You had never taken an arrow to the knee before, but then the Fire Nation attacked.

 

[Lohrenswald]

I used to hate Norway, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

 

[classical_hero]

Not much hate towards Norway as Australia, meaning that Australia is much more interesting than Norway. We rule.

 

[Takhisis]

I think you mean 'not as much hate towards Norway as towards Australia'. Which is understandable, as they speak better English than you lot.

 

[Lohrenswald]

I think you mean 'not as much hate towards Norway as towards Australia'. Which is understandable, as they speak better English than you lot.

lolno


Link to video.

 

[Leifmk]

Norway has at least. Generally the majority of the price you actually pay is tax. For example a 1 liter bottle of 40% alcohol has a tax of 247 NOK, and a quick look at the internet site of the norwegian alcohol monopoly tells me that you get a bottle of Absolute Vodka for 420 NOK. So in that example 58% of the price is tax. 420 NOK is about 68 USD.

Mind you the tax is entirely a function of the amount of alcohol; a bottle of the cheapest 40% vodka on the market is taxed the same amount as a same-sized bottle of fancy exclusive 40% single malt which has a much higher base price; so it's not as noticeable for the good expensive stuff which is the only stuff worth drinking anyway.

 

[Leifmk]

Yeah, and before they found that oil it was a dreadful desolate place: People living in clay huts, children starving, international relief efforts had to be organised on Norway's account. If it weren't for the oil they'd all have to eat their shoes. Heck, they wouldn't have shoes.

Yeah, we keep separate statistics for the GDP without the oil sector and if it wasn't for the oil we'd be struggling right alongside such destitute third-world hellholes as, say, Canada or the Netherlands. You know, people having to eat elderly relatives, piles of skulls on every streetcorner, etc.

 

[Domen]

I'm from Sweden, Norway has always been our country to ridicule "think Irish jokes"

Years back they found those huge deposites of oil within their territory, and the country booooooooooooooooooooomed from nothing to be strong. They're still sucking up that oil.

Norway got strong from sucking up oil and you got strong from sucking up Germany, Poland and others. You still have our things in museums.

Swedes used to be known as the most uncivilized robbers of Europe in the past.

So if you hate Norway because they got rich in an "unjust way", then you should also hate your own country too.

As for "Irish jokes" - there are also such "jokes" about Sweden from old days.

For example:

"I had doubts if those were even humans, they were so feral, dirty, unkempt, entirely raggedy and barefoot. Most of them were just silly peasant juveniles. And those were the Swedes in question, who are being taken away from their fields and plows and forcefully conscripted to the army by the state."

This is description of Swedish national infantry (ethnic Swedish conscripts in the army of Gustavus II Adolphus) from year 1635.

So - as you can see - not only Norway and Ireland used to be very poor in the past.

But the same guy who wrote the excerpt on ethnic Swedish infantry quoted above, wrote about Scottish mercenaries in Swedish service:

"When I went further, I saw the poorest of them all - the Scotsmen."

Finland was also "not exactly rich" - even though the overall impression was better than in case of Swedes and Scotsmen:

Description of Finnish Hakkapeliitta cavalry by the same guy:

"In another part of the camp I saw the Finns; they serve as cavalry and they have good and strong horses. I was looking around to find out where could be their officers, because those who were on horseback looked like grooms, so poorly and miserably attired men they were. But entire Germany painfully experienced how great was bravery of those Finns. (...) In case of victory, they plunder everything and anything is already a profit for them."

Author of these descriptions was French.

 

[Domen]

Think about it: Gustav Adolph was a competent ruler and a brilliant strategist who almost conquered Europe, but left Norway alone.

Initially his competence was mostly about superior numbers (mostly poor quality Swedish conscripts + some good quality foreign mercenaries, as well as good quality Finnish cavalry) and avoiding battles. He avoided battles to the point that even when having 15000 men vs 2000 in the Lithuanian army, he still did not want to fight in the open field, advancing through forests and swamps and hiding behind earthworks elsewhere (see the source quoted below).

Only later, when he already acquired a large number of experienced veteran mercenaries (the bulk of his mercenaries being Germans - who also got the most favourable description in 1635 by the French guy whose descriptions of Swedes, Scots and Finns I quoted above), he had guts to do anything.

Here is description of GIIA's ways of waging war in Livonia in 1620s - written by Lithuanian Hetman Krzysztof Radziwiłł who fought vs Gustavus there:

My translation to English:

"(...) Deceased Carolus [Charles IX], whenever hearing about the presence of our forces, was immediately blindly leaving Riga and other fortresses with his forces, in order to confront us in the open field! But the sonny boy [Gustavus Adolphus] has realized what used to be harmful for his father; he is no longer willing to cast a dice hoping for a fluke, instead he is hanging on to fortifications. We have knocked some sense into him. (...)"

"(...) All he trusts are his Laufgraben, earthworks, bulwarks and cannons. (...) As long as we have shortage of infantry and war supplies, my army is forced to live from hand to mouth. (...) Fighting against his father was different, because his father [Charles IX] was bearding the lion in his den and facing us face-to-face in the open field, while this one is not drifting away from his fortifications farther than a span. (...)"

"(...) The old conceited impetousness of Swedish commanders is over, as well as their frequent defeats caused by that impetousness. That Swedish behaviour was until recently causing us to think that wars against this enemy can be swiftly won just with use of simple drive to confront them in pitched battles. (...) This is why we were not concerned about command skills of Carolus, because as soon as he got himself informed about the presence of our army somewhere, he was immediately abandoning sieges which were already in progress, as well as all other occasions, and blindly advancing with everything towards our forces to confront them in the field. On the other hand, his heir [Gustavus], unless he can be caught and harassed somewhere in an ambush or by sheer speed of unexpected advance, is securely sticking his forces with the sea, with castles, forests, marshes, entrenchments, cum summa rei he cannot be lured out of these places. Just like in the past Carolus was impetuous and seeking for all opportunities to confront us in the open, then now Gustavus is preferring to stay within his entrenchments and industries. (...)"

"(...) Nothing is encouraging Gustavus to wage war against us more than his understanding of the fact that we are relying on pitched battles in the open field and that we have problems with improving our old ways. (...)"

"(...) Either through forests or marshes Gustavus is approaching us, floating some of his men and cannons via water, leading the other part through land, so that I'm not able to attack him on his way, nor to interrupt his advance. But he is not even convinced of the natural defensive value provided to his men by these unapproachable places, which is why wherever his men are encamping, he orders them to dig trenches around their camp. (...)"

"(...) Since only he disembarked his forces at the coast, he has never encamped in a place and has never stayed with his army in an area, which would be favourable for us to attack. Now he is standing at the Musza river, surrounded from two sides by lakes and from the remaining two sides by forests and marshes several miles long, which are hard to cross even at Winter. (...) The enemy has with them 16 of large and smaller cannons, which indicates that they trust only in the strength of their entrenchments and their cannons. (...) His father was never waging wars like he does. (...)"

"(...) This enemy is no longer fighting against us like they used to fight before. They are not even thinking about a pitched battle in the open field. Quite the contrary, trying to avoid it, they are deliberately choosing the routes of their advance through dense forests, marshes, nearly impassable rivers and swamps. Gustavus is also sticking to the Dutch way of waging wars, he is reposing all his hope in strong entrenchments and firepower, to confronting which the current army of Your Majesty is not suitable, and this due to shortage of these things, which belong to such type of warfare, that is numerical amount of people, cannons, gunpowder, ammunition, spades, mattocks, etc. So if we need to fight against him for a longer time, then let me ask Your Majesty for reinforcements, especially for sending me more of combat-ready infantry (...)"

"(...) Your Majesty should realize, that Gustavus Adolphus doesn't even want to think about a battle in a flat field. This is why all of our hope is in mobilizing sufficient numbers of infantrymen and diggers. These two things I need, as well as strong artillery, and with God's help, this enemy will quickly be confounded. With help of infantry and artillery, I can force this enemy to abandon his entrenchments, in which he trusts so much. As long as I can't force them to abandon their entrenchments, they are not only rejecting a pitched battle, but would even like to dig themselves a dozen or so fathoms below the ground level if they only could. And considering that methods of warfare applied by Gustavus in Livonia are so much different than methods of warfare which used to be applied by his father, we must also abandon our methods of the past and stop hoping for the return of old days, but instead we should defeat the enemy with similar methods to ones in which he is now trusting and which seem to be hard for us. Gustavus trusts only in his entrenchments and in his firepower, we can push him back from his trenches just with our own firepower. (...)"

"(...) I have just over 2,000 combat-ready troops, while enemy forces apart from garrison troops of all castles number 15,000 (...)"

"(...) There are only two ways of defeating this enemy. One of them is a battle in an open field, to which it is impossible to lure Gustavus and my scouts aren't indicating that this may soon become possible. The other way is to assault his blokhauzes, to do which we aren't ready. Thus I'd like to ask Your Majesty to reinforce me with more men, including especially strong artillery, wagon-drivers, gunpowder, money and other war materials. Please order to send to me these things, for we are not able to achieve anything, before we manage to push the enemy back from their bulwarks located on this side of the Dvina River and very well fortified. We cannot scare the enemy out of their bulwarks with our flags, we need strength to do this. (...)"

"(...) In order to beat the enemies, who are digging in the ground like a mole, during the next Spring, and to break into their sharp teeth, we need especially a lot of infantry, but also hussars [heavy cavalry] to strengthen the army and cossacks [light cavalry] to cut off enemy supply lines. These three types of troops are necessary for us to achieve victory. (...)"

"(...) Your Majesty, I just hope that you send me some servants, and especially infantry and artillery, for which I am frequently asking. I hope you will condescend to order to help me with these reinforcements. Because as long as I don't have these things in abundance, I won't be able to fight against him within his fortifications. Even when I have managed to regain castles, I had not enough troops to establish garrisons there and not even diggers to fortify them, so I left them behind empty and they fell into enemy hands again. (...)"

Source:

"Dyskurs księcia Imci Krzysztofa Radziwiłła o podniesieniu wojny inflantskiej z Gustawem księciem sudermańskim, na sejmie warszawskim królowi Imci i wszystkim stanom koronnym do uważenia na piśmie podany w roku 1624" written by Lithuanian Hetman Krzysztof Radziwiłł - published in 1624.

 

[ParkCungHee]

I doubt you have bad intentions, but when politicians say that "natural resources should belong to the people", they usually mean they want to create jobs for their cronies.

To be fair, in a country like Norway, that would probably create a mostly equitable distribution.