Once a year, every year since Civ III was released in 2001, I get a hankering to build a civilization and do some conquering. So with the memory of all the swearing and banging of fist on table that accompanied last years two or three months of frustration a dim memory, Civ III finds its way onto my hard drive once more.
Whats the problem? You might ask. Well folks Im trapped trying to accomplish what I think may be an impossible quest, English, deity, huge default map, default rules, 16 civs, Oh and I almost forgot raging barbarians just to make it a little more of a challenge.
Am I some sort of masochist? Hmm, dont know, youll have to ask that weird guy with the white coat who brings my tablets.
So why not play on an easier level? Well Im a Civ II vet who beat every victory condition possible and when I have played Civ III on monarch I get bored as it turns into a stroll to victory. Emperor? Well yes but thats a lot of effort for something thats still going to leave me wanting the ultimate victory, so its all or nothing.
This time around I have played a couple of games up to around the start of AD before quitting. First one, I got rid of the Persians pretty effectively, but then realised there were one or two things I could have probably done better so quit. Second one, I built up ready for war against one of three nations. Russia, weak but the bordering part I would end up with after the AI jumped on the bandwagon and steals all the good bits was desert and not worth having. Rome, very nice piece of real estate but fighting legions with swordsmen is an uphill task, and finally Egypt the middle way, so thats my choice.
Anyway to cut a long story short the AI then manufactures a situation which sees everyone except Rome and me at war and with nothing to do the Romans are massing on my borders so if I do go to war with Egypt it will no doubt be war on two fronts for me. I attack the Romans take a couple of cities and then it becomes obvious that its deadlock. Ive seen enough and quit.
Those two examples were fun to play, but what usually gets me in the end is the mind numbing game of Starting locations Ive literally spent hours with my left hand grotesquely locked in a sort of OK symbol which enables me to press Ctr/Shift/Q and my right index finger sore from tapping up and enter.
In order to attempt my trial by ordeal I need a good starting position and that means, a cow for settler factory, hills for the chance of iron and the swords I need for early war and a river, which although not really necessary, I like to have because I like my capital to lead the way with population without the constraint of aqueducts.
All this has to be there on start up as I have no time to move. If I dont settle immediately it will take one more turn to reach writing, someone will beat me to it and I lose the one and only chance I have of getting a tech before the AI and with it a powerful trading tool, because not only is it a tech which they dont posses but it also gives access to trading for communications with every other Civ on the continent.
Starting locations then. After immediately quitting every 9 square jungle/desert/ice start (Does anyone play on them?) and every other start that doesnt meet with my exacting criteria Im left with maybe one start in 20. I then check the location on the mini map. Half way up and my scout will be confronted by an ocean of desert or jungle once he move from the 21 square oasis which I see at start up. Half way across between West and East and your on an island, which spells death by isolation playing at this level.
So every 50 starts I actually do some playing and usually after a couple of minutes I do some swearing when Bismark or one of those other reprobates plants a city touching the borders of London.
Just out of a matter of interest, have any of you retired early and watched the defeat screen as it shows the cities being settled in order? Its mighty mysterious how the human capital seems to act as a magnet for the AI settlers. I can understand civs trying to stop other civs from expanding but it seems like overkill when 3 or 4 AI civs all do it to the weakest civ on the map at the time. This kind of aggressive settling can make some maps untenable.
Assuming I make it this far I then have to negotiate crackpot loose cannons that cant be pacified by any means, my massive mountain range being barren of iron, whilst the Romans have two, one in each of the only hills within their lands and being beaten to writing by one turn. All of which spells a return to the drollery of the starting screen.
I wonder if this year will see me gaining the all illusive victory or will Civ III be returning to its box in a month or two with a huge self satisfied grin all over its smug face. My money is on the later.
Whats the problem? You might ask. Well folks Im trapped trying to accomplish what I think may be an impossible quest, English, deity, huge default map, default rules, 16 civs, Oh and I almost forgot raging barbarians just to make it a little more of a challenge.
Am I some sort of masochist? Hmm, dont know, youll have to ask that weird guy with the white coat who brings my tablets.
So why not play on an easier level? Well Im a Civ II vet who beat every victory condition possible and when I have played Civ III on monarch I get bored as it turns into a stroll to victory. Emperor? Well yes but thats a lot of effort for something thats still going to leave me wanting the ultimate victory, so its all or nothing.
This time around I have played a couple of games up to around the start of AD before quitting. First one, I got rid of the Persians pretty effectively, but then realised there were one or two things I could have probably done better so quit. Second one, I built up ready for war against one of three nations. Russia, weak but the bordering part I would end up with after the AI jumped on the bandwagon and steals all the good bits was desert and not worth having. Rome, very nice piece of real estate but fighting legions with swordsmen is an uphill task, and finally Egypt the middle way, so thats my choice.
Anyway to cut a long story short the AI then manufactures a situation which sees everyone except Rome and me at war and with nothing to do the Romans are massing on my borders so if I do go to war with Egypt it will no doubt be war on two fronts for me. I attack the Romans take a couple of cities and then it becomes obvious that its deadlock. Ive seen enough and quit.
Those two examples were fun to play, but what usually gets me in the end is the mind numbing game of Starting locations Ive literally spent hours with my left hand grotesquely locked in a sort of OK symbol which enables me to press Ctr/Shift/Q and my right index finger sore from tapping up and enter.
In order to attempt my trial by ordeal I need a good starting position and that means, a cow for settler factory, hills for the chance of iron and the swords I need for early war and a river, which although not really necessary, I like to have because I like my capital to lead the way with population without the constraint of aqueducts.
All this has to be there on start up as I have no time to move. If I dont settle immediately it will take one more turn to reach writing, someone will beat me to it and I lose the one and only chance I have of getting a tech before the AI and with it a powerful trading tool, because not only is it a tech which they dont posses but it also gives access to trading for communications with every other Civ on the continent.
Starting locations then. After immediately quitting every 9 square jungle/desert/ice start (Does anyone play on them?) and every other start that doesnt meet with my exacting criteria Im left with maybe one start in 20. I then check the location on the mini map. Half way up and my scout will be confronted by an ocean of desert or jungle once he move from the 21 square oasis which I see at start up. Half way across between West and East and your on an island, which spells death by isolation playing at this level.
So every 50 starts I actually do some playing and usually after a couple of minutes I do some swearing when Bismark or one of those other reprobates plants a city touching the borders of London.
Just out of a matter of interest, have any of you retired early and watched the defeat screen as it shows the cities being settled in order? Its mighty mysterious how the human capital seems to act as a magnet for the AI settlers. I can understand civs trying to stop other civs from expanding but it seems like overkill when 3 or 4 AI civs all do it to the weakest civ on the map at the time. This kind of aggressive settling can make some maps untenable.
Assuming I make it this far I then have to negotiate crackpot loose cannons that cant be pacified by any means, my massive mountain range being barren of iron, whilst the Romans have two, one in each of the only hills within their lands and being beaten to writing by one turn. All of which spells a return to the drollery of the starting screen.
I wonder if this year will see me gaining the all illusive victory or will Civ III be returning to its box in a month or two with a huge self satisfied grin all over its smug face. My money is on the later.
