Not-So-Useful leaders, city states, special abilities, traits (and so on)

Not-So-Useful Unit:

TITANIC
Sinks automatically if it comes withing sight of an Ice tile.
 
Not-So-Useful Religious Belief:

Y2K
All followers of this religion increase gold production by 10% in each city for the year 1999, but then drops to -50% in the year 2000.
 
How it should have been:

Leaning Tower of Pisa (Not-So-Useful Wonder)
Cost: 500 :c5production:
Cost per turn: 10 :c5production: (to keep it from fallling down)
Great Engineer points: -3 ("Stupid engineers, building a tower nobody can use!")
- 25 % generation of Great People in all Cities
After reaching the modern era:
+3 :c5gold: from tourism
Great Engineer points: +1 ("Hey, it didn't fall down!")
 
Not-so-useful Terrain:
Mirage
Oasis tiles which disappear as soon as your unit moves next to it

Not-so-useful Building:
Starbucks
+1 gold and +1 happiness in city, but -2 culture and -2 production
Cannot be built by the Roman Empire

Not-so-useful Unit:
UN Weapons Inspector
Causes all Nuclear Missiles and sources of Uranium in enemy territory to become invisible

Not-so-useful Natural Wonder:
El Dorado (how it really should be)
Gives +1000 gold to the first discoverer and +100 gold per turn when worked
Doesn't actually exist
 
Clint Eastwood (Not-So-Useful Great Prophet)
+10 :c5happy: in 1/3 of your cities
-10 :c5angry: in 1/3 of your cities
:confused: in 1/3 of your cities

(But of course: A Useful Great Artist)
 
Not-so-useful Leader:

George Bush

Unique Ability:
- when taking right decision: - 50% penalty
- when taking wrong decision: + 100% strenght

Unique Building: ranch: 25:c5production: puts your citizens every 5 turns 1 turn on vacation: 0:c5food:0:c5gold:0:c5culture:0:c5production:
Unique improvement: caves: give barbarians a place to hide (100% protection for barbs) so you don't have to hunt them down.
Unique Unit: Vice-president: tells him what to do (AI takes control over)
 
Not so useful Great Admirals: Erik the Red, Leif Ericson

Can travel across oceans no matter the age or tech. Can settle a city on another continent, just like a conquistador, but only on tundra. That city will have a 90% combat penalty against barbarians.
 
Not-so-Useful Leader: President Obama

Unique Ability: Hope and Change - every 4 turns the player is prompted with a message promising extra food, culture, science, faith, gold, and production, but it never happens.

Unique Unit: Vacation Entourage - this unit is an airplane available at Flight. Can station any cities in the world. Every time this unit moves to different city it cause -1:c5gold: and -1:c5happy: in your empire.

Unique Great Politician: Eric Holder - can send this special person to foreign city and give them bonus to that city's defense and extra experience to military units created from that city.
 
Not-So-Useful National Wonder: Congress

Social policy cost increased by 50%. -2:c5unhappy: for every citizen in the empire, and +10 :c5unhappy: for every Declaration of War.
 
Not-so-Useful Leader: President Obama

Unique Ability: Hope and Change - every 4 turns the player is prompted with a message promising extra food, culture, science, faith, gold, and production, but it never happens.

Unique Unit: Vacation Entourage - this unit is an airplane available at Flight. Can station any cities in the world. Every time this unit moves to different city it cause -1:c5gold: and -1:c5happy: in your empire.

Unique Great Politician: Eric Holder - can send this special person to foreign city and give them bonus to that city's defense and extra experience to military units created from that city.

Not-so-useful Leader: Mitt Romney

Unique Ability: Corporations are people, my friend - all buildings that produce gold ship half of that gold to the city-states of the George Town (capital of the Cayman Islands), Belmopan (capital of Belize), and Geneva. These city states are permanently allied, and produce the unique luxuries Shell Corporation and Offshore Bank Account, each giving -10 :c5happy:.

Unique National Wonder: Bain Capital (replaces National Treasury) - -10 :c5happy: in the city where it is built. +0.00000001 :c5gold: in the city where it is built.

Unique Great Person: Lobbyist (replaces Great Merchant) - when stationed in a city, that city gets -10 :c5happy: and the amount of :c5gold: shipped to the previously mentioned city-states doubles. Can build the unique tile improvement Deepwater Horizons, which provides oil but instantly self-destructs four turns after construction, leaving fallout (closest thing to oil spill) on and around its site.
 
Not-so-useful Leader: Mitt Romney

Unique Ability: Corporations are people, my friend - all buildings that produce gold ship half of that gold to the city-states of the George Town (capital of the Cayman Islands), Belmopan (capital of Belize), and Geneva. These city states are permanently allied, and produce the unique luxuries Shell Corporation and Offshore Bank Account, each giving -10 :c5happy:.

Unique National Wonder: Bain Capital (replaces National Treasury) - -10 :c5happy: in the city where it is built. +0.00000001 :c5gold: in the city where it is built.

Unique Great Person: Lobbyist (replaces Great Merchant) - when stationed in a city, that city gets -10 :c5happy: and the amount of :c5gold: shipped to the previously mentioned city-states doubles. Can build the unique tile improvement Deepwater Horizons, which provides oil but instantly self-destructs four turns after construction, leaving fallout (closest thing to oil spill) on and around its site.

lol :lol:
 
Uhh....I don't get it. Would someone explain what I am missing here?

The Mars Lander was a joint venture between Britain and the United States on sending a lander to Mars. Both countries participated in the calculations ( research) for the operation to go successfully.

England did some calculations and sent them over to the US. The US took these calculations, input some data and then programmed the lander.

The problem was no one ever asked about the units. The calculations were provided in SI units (meters) while the Americans programmed the Lander in....feet. :rolleyes:

Yeah it crashed.
 
Not-so-useful Leader: Mitt Romney

Unique Ability: Corporations are people, my friend - all buildings that produce gold ship half of that gold to the city-states of the George Town (capital of the Cayman Islands), Belmopan (capital of Belize), and Geneva. These city states are permanently allied, and produce the unique luxuries Shell Corporation and Offshore Bank Account, each giving -10 :c5happy:.

Unique National Wonder: Bain Capital (replaces National Treasury) - -10 :c5happy: in the city where it is built. +0.00000001 :c5gold: in the city where it is built.

Unique Great Person: Lobbyist (replaces Great Merchant) - when stationed in a city, that city gets -10 :c5happy: and the amount of :c5gold: shipped to the previously mentioned city-states doubles. Can build the unique tile improvement Deepwater Horizons, which provides oil but instantly self-destructs four turns after construction, leaving fallout (closest thing to oil spill) on and around its site.

Lobbyists aren't unique to Mitt Romney, just saying. How about we agree to disagree that all US presidents have done things that are controversial to either side?
 
Not-so-useful PART of a UA:
Scourge of God
borrows city names from other Civs.;)
________________________________
Stupid truth always resisting simplicity.
-John Green
 
The political ones are gold regardless of who you support. Here's a couple offensive ones:

Leader: Mitt Romney

Unique Ability: Republican Values, :c5faith: doubles in all cities, :c5science: is halved. Christianity is the only allowed religion. :c5gold: and :c5angry: increase 50%.

New Social Policy: Mormon Families, policies encourage large families. One :c5citizen: per city every 5 turns regardless of :c5food: supply (starvation is possible). However 10% reduction in :c5gold: to fund magic underwear purchases.

Leader: Barak Obama

Unique Ability: Illegal Immigration, everytime a city in a neighboring civilization increases in :c5citizen:, there is a 50% chance the :c5citizen: will join your nearest city instead and a 50% chance it will become permanently unemployable but will still consume :c5food:.

New Social Policy: European Socialism, 15% of all :c5citizen: are permanently unemployed but continue to consume :c5food:.
 
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