The Anti-Wonders of the World

[carmen510]

This thread is priceless.

The Rock: Can only be built in San Fran... Errr... Bay City, USA. Allows KGB agents to plant four nukes around the city, until Furon alien picks it up with his saucer.

NESing: Requires Internet. -, , , , + for Alternate Histories

Alternate Histories: Due to das, -100% knowledge of all history in the world. +das's manipulation of history.

Soviet Embassies: -500 Communism! for foreign relations.

Britney Spears: City with this 'great person' loses all sensible population. All units within 2 tiles of the city die from horrible singing. All worked tiles within 3 tiles of the city are destroyed.

Monopoly: +5 in every city. 'Where'd you get all that money from? I knew I shouldn't have let you be banker!'

Risk: +3 in every city. 'What, a ONE??? It hit the table!'

D&D: -, , , , + , (Fast food, chips, etc.), every city converts to D&D polytheism, all Great People turn into Super nerds, all citizens become nerds.

Bush Administration: + war weariness, +all cities' population 'Scandals, pointless war, lies, spying, etc.', - all government decency/trust, - Republican party from ever winning the next election.

 

[TheBladeRoden]

Oregon Trail: 50% chance of losing your cavalry units when crossing a river.

 

[Pres. Slayback]

Al Sharpton - +100% War , -50 , Relations With Non-Christian Nations Set To Furious, Military Production Disabled

 

[carmen510]

Harry Potter: + in every city with Christianity, -2 foreign relation with Christian religion (You spread witchcraft and wizardry!), + 100% non-Christians in every city for people waiting for Book 7 and the movies.

Teapot Dome Scandal: 100% corruption in all cities, +100% in every city

 

[Martinus]

Legalisation of Gay Marriage: +1 Happiness per population point, +1 Unhappiness per Religion

I don't think this qualifies as an anti-wonder - I mean these effects are clearly beneficial in most cities, save the small ones with many religions.

 

[flyingchicken]

Bah.

• Legislation of Gay Marriage: stops pop growth

 

[Martinus]

Bah.

• Legislation of Gay Marriage: stops pop growth

I can only feel pity for all these poor heterosexual men, who would have suddenly started to play the catcher if only gay marriage was legalised.

 

[Onagan]

[*]Legislation of Gay Marriage:

It isn't a anti-wonder. It only generates happiness for Gays. I don't see the problem of happy gays.
But maybe it's because i was raised in one of the most modern country on this subject.

 

[flyingchicken]

That's why it's only effect should be to stop population growth. Also, it should be renamed to Legislation of Exclusively Gay Marriage Outlawing Straight Marriage and Other Forms of Heterosexual Relationships, to preperly reflect this.

More:

• The Mausoleum of the First Qin Emperor: farms produce -1 and +1 because of soil mercury content, +1 "My back still hurts!"
• Lincoln Memorial: +5 with Slavery and Free Speech
• The Ziggurat of Ur: -2 "You cheated! The aliens helped you!"
• The Pyramids: -2 "You cheated! The aliens helped you!"

 

[carmen510]

Mayan Pyramids/Chichen Itza: Same as Pyramids

CivIV Hacker: -10000000000 "You dirty cheater!", +infinite everything else

American Revolution: Only for British Civilization/American. All cities on other continents than the capital become American. Half of all discontented American cities go to Britain.

French Revolution: Only for France. Requires American Revolution and Bastille to be built. Your leader is executed, all citizens mad due to overtaxation, government changes to dictatorship and new leader is Napoleon.

1848-Year of Revolutions: Only European countries can build. All European countries' cities have all citizens angry. "How come America has all the freedoms? Its only 60 years old and ours are like 1000 years old!"

American Civil War: Requires American Revolution. Only American. All discontented cities form Confederate States of America. Confederate States of America automatically has better units and declare war on you.

Vietnam War: Vietnam splits. America declares war on North Vietnam. Most units sent to South Vietnam. 9/10 of every American cities' citizens are angry. "I don't give a damn about Uncle Sam!"

Iraq War: America declares war on Iraq. Same effects as Vietnam, only 2/3 of citizens are angry.

 

[Nikis-Knight]

OT

Spoiler :

saying the US foreign policy is to attack all muslim/communist countries is like saying Bill Clinton took advantage of every woman in the white house. A gross exaggeration.

I don't understand the humor on this one UN human rights.
Canadian Louise Arbour is the commissioner and i think she is doing a great job.

It's not "ha ha" funny, its "you can't be serious" funny. you've heard of Darfur? Where militias sheltered by the government of Sudan are comitting "ethnic cleansing"? Sudan was on the UN human rights commission, or panel, or whatever it's called.


2nd Amendment--prevents changing away from Representation or universal sufferage civics
NARAL---10% pop growth; -10% GPP; -2 happiness with Christianity (or any other functional moral code)

 

[carmen510]

1st Amendment: -10 in foreign relations with Russia (Stalin only), Germany (Hitler only), Italy (Mussolini only), and all civs under Police State or Theocracy (With restrictions on religion).

2nd Amendment: -10 in foreign relations with those with gun control. 2/3 of citizens are "Guns are killing our citizens!"

Prohibition: All citizens mad. "Hic... You better let us drink the booze!", + for all other nations for smuggling alcohol to the country with Prohibition.

US Elections 2008: All citizens in civil disorder. "So many candidates, but I need one who has all the qualities of all Democratic/Republican candidates!"

Science: All citizens with religion are . -2 with all religious civs, and civs with religion. "God created everything, not BIOLOGY!"

Religion: All scientists quit. -2 with all Scientific Civs. "Biology was how nature came!"

Biologist Priest: Both effects of Religion and Science. -4 with all religious civs, scientific civs, and allreligious cities. "Are you with us or not, you oxymoron?"

Classical Music: All people born in modern age cities are . "This music sucks ass!"

Rock 'N Roll, Punk, Rock, etc.: All people born before Modern Age are "This music is too loud, vulgar, scandalous, etc."

Concerto with 50 Cent: Effects of the two above. "You insane? That music is crap!" -20 in foreign relations. "ARGHHHH! My EARS!"

Leaning Tower of Pisa: Unless you invest 20 gold each 5 turns after its built, it will fall and crush all citizens/buildings within radius.

Venice: City will flood due to global warming. -100 to all civs with environmentalism to all civs with polluting industries. "You caused an uber cultural city to sink!"

Polar Ice Caps: Once Global Warming starts, these melt and cause oceans to rise. About 1/4 - 1/2 of all land is lost, as well as anything on it.

 

[unexplained]

John Howard Wonder: Civ's policies automatically become whatever the policies of the leading civ are.

Zinedine Zidane Wonder: Any declaration of war results in instant dismissal from game.

Chelsea Football Club Wonder: instant increase of 1,000,000 gp, and all existing Great People join your civ, you become the best civ in your part of the world, but still can't win the big prize.

Graeme Poll Wonder: The game starts making up the rules as it goes along.

 

[Danielos]

"Civilization" Game wonder:

-20% shield and food production
New promotion "Obesity"
Diplomatic effect: -3 "You ridicule us in that game of yours!"

 

[flyingchicken]

^
I already said it halves ! Ha ha.

• United Nations Statistics Division: +25% , -2 "You do not lie about us -- you give statistics!"
• European Union: all European Civs ally and declare war one everyone else
• Hoover Dam: obsoletes fresh water bonuses

 

[Catharsis]

Graeme Poll Wonder: The game starts making up the rules as it goes along.

Brilliant! I bet it would declare war on you three times as well.

Saddam Hussein: The game CD runs away and hides under your desk.

 

[sequence]

Millennium Dome: -100% , -25% in the building city whilst building. +5 "what the hell are we supposed to do with that?"

 

[Onagan]

Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf You don't have any idea of military in your borders. Other civilizations get +1 Happiness with Broadcast Tower

 

[flyingchicken]

Those are single people! Oh well, it's a relatively free thread.

• Microsoft Works: -25% , -25% , +1 "No."
• Copyright Laws: +100% maintenance, barb Galleons and Frigates spawn, other Civs are granted all your techs
• Entertainment Software Rating Board: +5 "WE WANT BLOOD AND SEX!", then anarchy

 

[carmen510]