I only play Ramesses about 95% of the time, so I can't speak about other leaders. Here is what I do…
1. I try to get two cities with Barracks and make at least 12 War Chariots. Give 2 or 3 of them flanking promotions.
2. Research only as far as Pottery and Writing. Then set the research to zero and leave it there until the war is over. Keep building WC's to replace those lost, as needed.
3. Take out opponents horses and metal mines first, then his two largest cities. Pillage the capital while waiting to get enough troops there. Expect you will need about double the number of defenders.
4. Finish him off completely,if you can do it effectively. Otherwise, cripple him, and finish him later after you get better military techs. Horse Archers, Cats.
5. After the war, build libraries and cottages to help your economy recover.
6. I stopped rushing Protective leaders. Good luck--expect extra casaulties!