Something I wrote just now, feel free to comment as always. 
The Ear Dialogues
Written by TM
_____
I swear David, if we ears werent attached to Tylers head, he would lose us.
You may not have noticed, John, but we arent attached to his head, David replied.
I know that, it was a figure of speech. I was trying to be funny, John said.
Well, youre right in that it looks like hes lost us. Hey Tyler, were not under your pillow! David yelled.
Well, if he wouldnt have put us under a stack of unopened credit card applications, maybe he wouldnt have to look so hard, John said. Surely were more important than unopened envelopes?
He doesnt even wear us anymore, wonder why he needs us? David asked.
Maybe hes speaking again? John replied.
I hope not. I hate being tossed and thrown like a baseball. Does he not realize how expensive we are, how wondrously were made, and how cool we are? And yet, he lets us be touched by mere mortals, people who probably havent washed their hands in ages, people who . . .
Yo, David, shut up, came a call from the bookshelf. Im trying to get some shuteye here and you keep babbling on about some such thing or other.
Sorry Bones, David said. Didnt mean to disturb you.
Of all the things David and John had seen in their time as the young mans ears, Bones, a skull who somehow grew eyes of glass, made their silicon shake the most. They could handle blood, leeches, and oh how they loved the cute nurses at the hospital, but a talking skull, they couldnt handle.
Not only that, but for being a supposed exact replica of Tyler, the ear wearers skull, Bones had a completely different personality. Tyler never said a bad word about anyone, never swore, always seemed quiet, and Bones never missed an opportunity to do the exact opposite.
Thats right you didnt mean to disturb me, you silicon fool. You think you have it so tough, uh? Ill tell you what tough is, Tyler, the weirdo that he is, no, he doesnt throw me into audiences or wear me, or even give me the slightest of attention, accept when hes got a camera in his hand. A camera! Thats all Im good for, taking pictures! He treats me like Halloween fixture.
You got to admit it though Bones, John said, you are kind of a Halloween fixture.
How dare you! Bones, in his rage, sent one of his glass eyes flying at the two ears.
My point exactly, John said.
Well, fine, maybe I am a little creepy and scary. However, if you think you guys have it bad, Tyler thinks he has the right to use me as a prop for pictures. He sets me on the floor, turns the lights out, and shines a flashlight into the back of my eyes so that I glow. Do you have any idea how much that hurts?
Youre made of plastic and glass, how does it hurt? David asked.
It hurts the pride. I was made for a medicinal purpose; to aid in a very state of the art surgery that had never been done before.
Howd that turn out for you? John asked.
It was the greatest experience of my life, Bones replied.
Bones, to be fair, up until that surgery, you had no life. You were just a heap of plastic someplace, David said.
So, Ive lived almost a year since then, and nothing has been so great as that day when I changed the world for the better and became a first in medical technology.
Braggart, John said. And admit it, you like the attention of the pictures.
Well, maybe a little, Bones said.
I thought you did, youve always liked Tyler for some reason. What that reason is, I have no clue. I cant believe hes is still looking for us. John said.
If hed ever clean his room like his parents always tell him to, maybe wed be more noticeable, David said. You know, were not Bones here. We dont have such an obnoxious attitude and mean look that he could be spotted from miles away.
Youre lucky they didnt make a body and legs with me, or Id walk over there and accidentally throw you both in the shredder, Bones said. I hope this time when Tyler throws you in the audience, that he decides he doesnt want you back.
Tyler finally remember where he had set David and John, tossed aside the credit card applications and picked up his ears. However, to the shock of Bones, he also picked him up as well and placed him into his school bag.
Have fun in the dark, Bones! John yelled.
Whoa, hes putting that lotion on us that helps our edges stick to his skin, David said. Hes going to wear us.
Well, that promise never to wear us again lasted a whole month and a half, John said.
I guess were just that cool John, David said.
No, Im that cool, youre just his left ear.
Well, he needs both of us. Hed look kinda funny only wearing one, David said.
And you dont think he looks funny when he doesnt wear us at all? John asked.
Youve got a point, David replied.
Ears, for all the silicon in their brains, are usually bright and intelligent things. They were right to assume that Tyler, who spoke often, was going to be using them in a speaking engagement. They were right to assume that Tyler, who loved throwing them into crowds, would do so again that evening. Ears; however, are not always right.
Buffalo Wild Wings Grill and Bar is a good establishment with good, although some what overpriced, food. It is also often filled with college students, and college students, are never ones to back down from a good bet. Especially when that bet seems as improbable as the sun rising in the west and setting the east. Of course, if east meant west and west meant east, the sun rising in the west and setting in the east would be entirely probable, but thats getting a little off the track of our story.
Smells like chicken, John said as they walked into the restaurant.
This is confusing, David said. I thought wed be going to some speaking thing.
Well unless Tyler got a gig to speak to a bunch of rowdy students at a bar, I doubt it.
Tyler sat down at a stool in the bar and ordered a glass of water. He hoped his choice of drink would be an advantage over the people sitting on the stools next to him.
Hey man, Tyler said to the guy next to him. Hows it going?
Fine, thanks man.
Say, John replied, I need a little extra money for some books I want to purchase
That might be a phrase thats never been uttered in a bar, John laughed.
are you one to take bets? Tyler asked.
Depends, the man at the bar said. What type of bet.
I bet you, twenty dollars that I can stick this ear (pointing to John, the right ear) into make it touch the bottom of your glass.
You think you can touch your right ear to the bottom of my glass? the man inquired. Okay.
Tyler made sure other people in the bar had been made aware of the bet.
I dont like this, David, John said. Im not a big fan of being stuck into alcohol.
What a fool that guy is though, said David. Didnt anyone ever tell him that taking bets from a quiet guy who sits down at a bar and orders water is a bad idea?
Tyler put his hand on his John, his right ear, pulled him off of the magnetic posts that attached John to his head, and dropped him into the mans glass of beer. In the process, John found out the answer to the age-old question of: do ears float?
Dear Lord does it stink down here! John yelled. Get me out of here already!
And here I thought you were complaining that you were thirsty John, David giggled.
Dude, thats so not fair, you tricked me, the man at the bar said.
Sorry man, but everyone around here saw you make the bet, Tyler replied.
All the heads of the people standing around nodded in agreement and the man handed Tyler a twenty-dollar bill.
Thanks, Tyler said to the man.
Tyler got up from the stool, grabbed his bag, and started walking towards the door.
Hey! Wait, Im still down here! John yelled.
Hey man, you forgot your ear, the man at the bar said.
You can keep it dude, Tyler said. I dont need it anymore.
No! John yelled.
Bye John, David said, Ill miss you.
Dont leave me here, alone! No!
Johns screams were useless. Tyler walked out of the bar, and the ear that called himself John, never saw Tyler again.
After leaving the bar, Tyler put a stocking cap on. This allowed him to fool yet another not so bright person at another bar across town. As with John, David found himself left at the bottom of another persons beer glass. He shouted and yelled and cried for Tyler to not leave him behind, but Tyler, as with John, left without turning back.
Back at his room at home, Tyler unzipped his bag and took out Bones and placed him back on the shelf.
Bones said, Well, its about time you got rid of them.
You knew?
Knew what? Bones asked.
That I could hear what they said, Tyler replied.
Yeah, I knew. Your body language gave it away.
How come you never told them? Tyler asked.
Because I liked them about as much as you did, Bones replied. I must admit though, I didnt think youd ever do it, but after you stopped wearing them, you gave me hope.
You know why I did it, dont you? Tyler asked.
Not really, I would have done it just because of their personality, but you havent tossed me aside, and Im more of an ass than they are.
I got rid of them because they thought they were special. They thought I needed them. Without them, John and David thought I to be inferior, not as good looking. They were crafted to be art forms, and art forms they were. They were near perfect. Life; however, isnt about being perfect, and life, certainly isnt about looking like an art form.
Why didnt you do it sooner? Bones asked.
Well, they were right for awhile, I needed them. I couldnt live without them. They were becoming part of my soul, part of my being. Two pieces of silicon had become a huge part of my persona and my identity. I couldnt walk without them, couldnt talk without them, and couldnt go to the bathroom without them. I needed them, and thats why I got rid of them.
The old letting go of the thing that you hold on to the most strategy, Bones replied.
No, it was the letting go and getting rid of the thing I thought I needed most, Tyler said. I dont need, and never did need those ears.
They were good for getting money out of people though, Bones laughed.
Yes, that they were, Tyler said. Let that be their lasting legacy; that they were able to help me buy a couple of more books.
The Ear Dialogues
Written by TM
_____
I swear David, if we ears werent attached to Tylers head, he would lose us.
You may not have noticed, John, but we arent attached to his head, David replied.
I know that, it was a figure of speech. I was trying to be funny, John said.
Well, youre right in that it looks like hes lost us. Hey Tyler, were not under your pillow! David yelled.
Well, if he wouldnt have put us under a stack of unopened credit card applications, maybe he wouldnt have to look so hard, John said. Surely were more important than unopened envelopes?
He doesnt even wear us anymore, wonder why he needs us? David asked.
Maybe hes speaking again? John replied.
I hope not. I hate being tossed and thrown like a baseball. Does he not realize how expensive we are, how wondrously were made, and how cool we are? And yet, he lets us be touched by mere mortals, people who probably havent washed their hands in ages, people who . . .
Yo, David, shut up, came a call from the bookshelf. Im trying to get some shuteye here and you keep babbling on about some such thing or other.
Sorry Bones, David said. Didnt mean to disturb you.
Of all the things David and John had seen in their time as the young mans ears, Bones, a skull who somehow grew eyes of glass, made their silicon shake the most. They could handle blood, leeches, and oh how they loved the cute nurses at the hospital, but a talking skull, they couldnt handle.
Not only that, but for being a supposed exact replica of Tyler, the ear wearers skull, Bones had a completely different personality. Tyler never said a bad word about anyone, never swore, always seemed quiet, and Bones never missed an opportunity to do the exact opposite.
Thats right you didnt mean to disturb me, you silicon fool. You think you have it so tough, uh? Ill tell you what tough is, Tyler, the weirdo that he is, no, he doesnt throw me into audiences or wear me, or even give me the slightest of attention, accept when hes got a camera in his hand. A camera! Thats all Im good for, taking pictures! He treats me like Halloween fixture.
You got to admit it though Bones, John said, you are kind of a Halloween fixture.
How dare you! Bones, in his rage, sent one of his glass eyes flying at the two ears.
My point exactly, John said.
Well, fine, maybe I am a little creepy and scary. However, if you think you guys have it bad, Tyler thinks he has the right to use me as a prop for pictures. He sets me on the floor, turns the lights out, and shines a flashlight into the back of my eyes so that I glow. Do you have any idea how much that hurts?
Youre made of plastic and glass, how does it hurt? David asked.
It hurts the pride. I was made for a medicinal purpose; to aid in a very state of the art surgery that had never been done before.
Howd that turn out for you? John asked.
It was the greatest experience of my life, Bones replied.
Bones, to be fair, up until that surgery, you had no life. You were just a heap of plastic someplace, David said.
So, Ive lived almost a year since then, and nothing has been so great as that day when I changed the world for the better and became a first in medical technology.
Braggart, John said. And admit it, you like the attention of the pictures.
Well, maybe a little, Bones said.
I thought you did, youve always liked Tyler for some reason. What that reason is, I have no clue. I cant believe hes is still looking for us. John said.
If hed ever clean his room like his parents always tell him to, maybe wed be more noticeable, David said. You know, were not Bones here. We dont have such an obnoxious attitude and mean look that he could be spotted from miles away.
Youre lucky they didnt make a body and legs with me, or Id walk over there and accidentally throw you both in the shredder, Bones said. I hope this time when Tyler throws you in the audience, that he decides he doesnt want you back.
Tyler finally remember where he had set David and John, tossed aside the credit card applications and picked up his ears. However, to the shock of Bones, he also picked him up as well and placed him into his school bag.
Have fun in the dark, Bones! John yelled.
Whoa, hes putting that lotion on us that helps our edges stick to his skin, David said. Hes going to wear us.
Well, that promise never to wear us again lasted a whole month and a half, John said.
I guess were just that cool John, David said.
No, Im that cool, youre just his left ear.
Well, he needs both of us. Hed look kinda funny only wearing one, David said.
And you dont think he looks funny when he doesnt wear us at all? John asked.
Youve got a point, David replied.
Ears, for all the silicon in their brains, are usually bright and intelligent things. They were right to assume that Tyler, who spoke often, was going to be using them in a speaking engagement. They were right to assume that Tyler, who loved throwing them into crowds, would do so again that evening. Ears; however, are not always right.
Buffalo Wild Wings Grill and Bar is a good establishment with good, although some what overpriced, food. It is also often filled with college students, and college students, are never ones to back down from a good bet. Especially when that bet seems as improbable as the sun rising in the west and setting the east. Of course, if east meant west and west meant east, the sun rising in the west and setting in the east would be entirely probable, but thats getting a little off the track of our story.
Smells like chicken, John said as they walked into the restaurant.
This is confusing, David said. I thought wed be going to some speaking thing.
Well unless Tyler got a gig to speak to a bunch of rowdy students at a bar, I doubt it.
Tyler sat down at a stool in the bar and ordered a glass of water. He hoped his choice of drink would be an advantage over the people sitting on the stools next to him.
Hey man, Tyler said to the guy next to him. Hows it going?
Fine, thanks man.
Say, John replied, I need a little extra money for some books I want to purchase
That might be a phrase thats never been uttered in a bar, John laughed.
are you one to take bets? Tyler asked.
Depends, the man at the bar said. What type of bet.
I bet you, twenty dollars that I can stick this ear (pointing to John, the right ear) into make it touch the bottom of your glass.
You think you can touch your right ear to the bottom of my glass? the man inquired. Okay.
Tyler made sure other people in the bar had been made aware of the bet.
I dont like this, David, John said. Im not a big fan of being stuck into alcohol.
What a fool that guy is though, said David. Didnt anyone ever tell him that taking bets from a quiet guy who sits down at a bar and orders water is a bad idea?
Tyler put his hand on his John, his right ear, pulled him off of the magnetic posts that attached John to his head, and dropped him into the mans glass of beer. In the process, John found out the answer to the age-old question of: do ears float?
Dear Lord does it stink down here! John yelled. Get me out of here already!
And here I thought you were complaining that you were thirsty John, David giggled.
Dude, thats so not fair, you tricked me, the man at the bar said.
Sorry man, but everyone around here saw you make the bet, Tyler replied.
All the heads of the people standing around nodded in agreement and the man handed Tyler a twenty-dollar bill.
Thanks, Tyler said to the man.
Tyler got up from the stool, grabbed his bag, and started walking towards the door.
Hey! Wait, Im still down here! John yelled.
Hey man, you forgot your ear, the man at the bar said.
You can keep it dude, Tyler said. I dont need it anymore.
No! John yelled.
Bye John, David said, Ill miss you.
Dont leave me here, alone! No!
Johns screams were useless. Tyler walked out of the bar, and the ear that called himself John, never saw Tyler again.
After leaving the bar, Tyler put a stocking cap on. This allowed him to fool yet another not so bright person at another bar across town. As with John, David found himself left at the bottom of another persons beer glass. He shouted and yelled and cried for Tyler to not leave him behind, but Tyler, as with John, left without turning back.
Back at his room at home, Tyler unzipped his bag and took out Bones and placed him back on the shelf.
Bones said, Well, its about time you got rid of them.
You knew?
Knew what? Bones asked.
That I could hear what they said, Tyler replied.
Yeah, I knew. Your body language gave it away.
How come you never told them? Tyler asked.
Because I liked them about as much as you did, Bones replied. I must admit though, I didnt think youd ever do it, but after you stopped wearing them, you gave me hope.
You know why I did it, dont you? Tyler asked.
Not really, I would have done it just because of their personality, but you havent tossed me aside, and Im more of an ass than they are.
I got rid of them because they thought they were special. They thought I needed them. Without them, John and David thought I to be inferior, not as good looking. They were crafted to be art forms, and art forms they were. They were near perfect. Life; however, isnt about being perfect, and life, certainly isnt about looking like an art form.
Why didnt you do it sooner? Bones asked.
Well, they were right for awhile, I needed them. I couldnt live without them. They were becoming part of my soul, part of my being. Two pieces of silicon had become a huge part of my persona and my identity. I couldnt walk without them, couldnt talk without them, and couldnt go to the bathroom without them. I needed them, and thats why I got rid of them.
The old letting go of the thing that you hold on to the most strategy, Bones replied.
No, it was the letting go and getting rid of the thing I thought I needed most, Tyler said. I dont need, and never did need those ears.
They were good for getting money out of people though, Bones laughed.
Yes, that they were, Tyler said. Let that be their lasting legacy; that they were able to help me buy a couple of more books.
