You know it's happened. Don't deny it. Look at yourself in the mirror and admit you have, on more than one occasion, been Dan Quayle. Well, here's your chance to redeem that shameful memory. Here's you chance to pull Dan Quayle's name and reputation out of the effluent pit of historical rankings and place him on high with Caeser Agustus.
No one said this would be easy. There are challenges to overcome, the first being your incompetence. It makes people angry, it makes them sick to their stomach. On top of that, you're a bit addled. Not right in the head. People of erudition don't like to spend time with you; truth be told they avoid you like the plague. Unfortunately, the challenge doesn't stop there. Ever heard of Michael Milken? Innocent in your books. Stock market bubbles, real estate bubbles, oil bubbles? All failures of Joe Investor, not the financial system:
You take, shall we say, a Roman view of public office. Get in, line your pockets, get out. As such, you're not too effective at it. You don't really hire people that are so effective either. They are too busy soaking up the benefits of their political appointment to do a good job (see, Brown, Michael D.):
There are many ways to overcome the challenge of being Dan Quayle; whichever way you decide to go, please remember "if you don't succeed, you run the risk of failure"
New Civ: Dan Quayle 2016-10-05
New Civ: Dan Quayle