June 1st, 1936:
Victoria (Tim),
It has come to my attention that you declared war on Mao. I have him in a cell in Beijing begging for his life. He has said that he would rather fall to the mighty Russians than those soft Redcoats England calls an army.
Leave my continent now!!
With love,
Catherine (Mitchum)
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January 3rd, 1937
Catherine,
It's too late! The Chinese archers in Nanjing fell to the royal English navy in an amphibious assult during the black of night. My men are complaining about your Russian winters. Heads will roll for questioning my decision to attack. I just hope the Russians are more welcoming than the Chinese.
Why don't we make a deal? How about you take Guangzhou and I'll take Shanghai. Once I have lowered the defenses of Shanghi, I'll swing my Frigates down to Guangzhou to help lower the defense in that city for you. Splitting the cities this way way avoid any cultural mingling of our two civilizations...
Sincerely,
Victoria
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June 29th, 1937
Victoria,
As far as I'm concerned, this entire continent belongs to mother Russia. We would never accept help from your British row boats. Unless, of course, you want to knock down Shanghai's cultural borders from the sea and I'll take the city from the land...
Catherine
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December 19th, 1937
Catherine,
I will knock down the cultural boarders for sure, I'm just hoping to take it from the ground before you. Check out the map. A split to the east of Shanghai and Nanjing is a natural boarder. I'm sure your troops are eager for rest.
Please reconsider,
Victoria
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May 30th, 1938
Victoria,
How dare you, you little wench!! Russian troops never need rest... especially in the tundra in the dead of winter. This is a job for real men with vodka as their companion. I suggest you take your Redcoats back to their cushy lives of eating crumpets and tea.
Catherine
P.S. Send my love to the Prince! Your son is such a naughty boy, you know...
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Later that year on November 16th, Vickie responded:
Catherine,
Stay away from the Prince!
You are welcome to the redcoats.
Victoria
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June 10th, 1939
Vicky,
Don't think for a minute that I haven't had my share of redcoats already. You've been in our land for several years now and I couldn't help myself. A woman has needs, you know. I always thought the Brits to more civilized... like your son. Something changes when you give a man a gun.
I'll send a caravel with a few real men... let's call them Russian soldiers. A few days with them will wipe that smug look off your face.
Don't pretend that you knew nothing of the Prince and me. He is a bit homely (must be the genes), but... how can I put this delicately... his endowment rivals some of the Californian men I've met... and I'm not talking money!
I'm glad that we got this out in the open. Dealing with other powerful women is such a relief after having spent so much time with men. Let's just say that I've got influence over men that someone as portly as yourself could never understand. I wonder if the silly American's will ever elect a woman president.
Toodaloo,
Cathy