1000 Clues youve been playing Civilization 3 too much

[Clown2TheLeft]

1180: When the kids complain that they're hungry, you tell them to build a harbor.

1181: You've ever said "All your base are belong to us" to the computer.

1182: You wish you could manage your household half as well you do your empire.

1183: So does everyone else in the household.


Later!

--The Clown to the Left

 

[Mattaba]

1184 on school you have a practical assignement about how to set up the logistics of refugee camp when a wave of refugees is coming.
The camp is near a river.
You are sleepy and think no problemo: lots of workers (refugees) to improve the terrain and you are near a river so you can irrigate and the surrounding terrain near a river is always good to grow food, so you think the camp can easily support itsself.

This happened to me, it's really sick to begin to think in civ terms in real life.

 

[hbdragon88]

1185 - You have installed Civ3 on your office computer to be able to play on Huge because you can't at home

1186 - You throw a fit when you only end up as "Alexander the Great" instead of "Alexander the Magnificent"

1187 - You have broken your mouse three times because you lost a game

1188 - You have done at least half the clues on this thread

 

[Sim_One]

Originally posted by William528
1143- when you say, the fire arrows of ZhouYu didn't defeat CaoCao at ChiBi, his ships sank because he didn't have The Great Lighthouse.

Romance of the Three Kingdoms fan eh? You certainly know your stuff.

 

[Raijer]

1189: Late at night, when no one else is awake, you think about that crack that JollyRoger made about pre-MP Civ, and you load up a game with France as the only rival. Then you try to get Joan of Arc all alone. You light a little incense, pour some wine. When things get mellow, you show her your collection of ancient japanese "sculptures," carved out of pure ivory. She digs 'em, but wonders if you have a few extra gold. No problem, baby.
The night ends with you getting some silk, some spice, and a hot ROP - if you know what I mean!!

 

[CurtSibling]

1187: When you leap up, screaming German obscenities as the verdamt Russians blast your Panzers and take over Hamburg!

(This is while wearing a blue Prussian uniform, like Otto's, hired from a costume shop)

 

[Raijer]

1191: Out of nowhere, you suddenly get a craving for a nice vegetarian curry.

1192: When your friends come over, you ask them "to sit a spell."

1193: You start taking milk baths to unwind.

 

[Raijer]

1194: You annoy the hell out of salespeople by saying "We're getting close to a deal here!" over and over.

1195: Whenever you get drunk, you want to "Go Zulu" on some punks.

1196: You find Civ Limricks endlessly amusing.

1197: You seriously ponder ways to include Civ 3 in your history dissertation.

 

[hbdragon88]

This next one should be 1198 b/c someone skipped three.

1198 - The only music you listen to is the modern day ages civ3 music

1199 - The rock band, "The Catherines" is a huge hit, and you're the singer

 

[Raijer]

1200 - You start picking up chicks in bars based solely on their resemblance to Joan of Arc.

1201 - When your sweet grandma asks you to pass the salt, you jump up and scream, "Enough of your insolence! Prepare for war!"

1202 - You secretly fear people will laugh at your puny civilization.

1203 - You start playing Civs, not based on their traits, but rather, on which leader head you think can "score chicks."

 

[hbdragon88]

1204 - You believe that Civ3 music is the only music worth listening to

1205 - You've been in court so much on the issue of Civ3 that every judge in your city knows you

1206 - You still think this thread is not dead; thus, you still post in it (if you haven't stopped)

 

[Raijer]

1207 - The waiter at How-Ching's hands you a menu, and you reply,"Hmm. The Chinese merchants are known the world over as crafty barginers, but I'll listen to your offer."

1208 - Whenever you listen to Kenny G., you glow with the feeling of being in "a brand new era."

1209 - Your wife gets annoyed at you and snaps, "You are very touchy these days honey. It's almost as if you didn't trust me," causing you to have a complete nervous breakdown.

 

[Raijer]

1210 - When rude drivers cut you off, you stick your hand out the window and give them what you like to call your "culture flip."

 

[Mattaba]

Originally posted by Raijer

1192: When your friends come over, you ask them "to sit a spell."

1211 - You have NO real world friends.

 

[Raijer]

Originally posted by Mattaba
1211 - You have NO real world friends.

1212 - You've got a gorgeous blonde named Mindy in your apartment. Candlelight flickers all around you as Mindy pours you another glass of wine. She gives you a wet kiss, and tells you she's going to change into something more comfortable. She returns wearing a skimpy negligee. As Mindy playfully pulls at the thin silk straps at her shoulder, letting the lingerie slip to the floor, you think to yourself, "Man, I wonder if I should just wait awhile before I build that Forbidden Palace."

 

[ETO_Peregrine]

Late as usual, but here goes:

1213 - You think the Schlieffen Plan was insane, but only because you know the German army would have taken at least one year to pass through Belgium with no RoP.

1214 - You think that Dresden was bombed in order to destroy the local library.

1215 - (Not really for Civ III) You instantly know the significance of this number.

1216 - You don't understand the significance of the number of the clue above because monarchies can't be toppled by civil disorder.

1217 - You wonder why the Sahara desert hasn't been completely populated after the advent of the railroad.

1218 - You wonder why it wasn't settled before then. Oil might have been found there, you know.

1219 - You remark on how lucky the allies were in WWII that their combined armies didn't vanish into thin air after capturing Berlin.

1220 - You explain neolithic tribes in remote places around the world as the warrior units deployed in the fourth millenium B.C. and fortified in the same spot ever since.

 

[hbdragon88]

1221 - The only history you know is from the little blurbs that you read about the Great Wonders

1222 - You have read and memorized every civlopedia entry and can rattle off anything instantly

1223 - You know the A/D/M ratings of every unit better than your girlfriend's phone #

1224 - You say that anyone that can punch twice before you can must be a tank, panzar, army, or modern armor

1225 - You wonder why and how the army can unload units, because you know that's only possible in 1.17

1226 - You figure that the marines are useless, so you ask yourself why they still have a marine corp

1227 - You tell you psychologists that for the last forty days that you've been waking up with recurring nightmares of Joan D' Arc and the domestic advisor

1228 - You imagine Joan instead of your girlfriend when you're making out

1229 - You are conducting regular sessions of 30-40 years each of Civ3

1230 - You enlist in the military to only have a nervous breakdown when you start to see girls with shaved haircuts

1231 - You've been involuntary committed twice for breaking down and mumbling, "No no no no no no..."

1232 - Your girlfriend tells you that she's thinking of a new style, one with an "ARMEE" shirt and a shaved head, and you fall to the ground, mumbling incessently

 

[CurtSibling]

1232 - You wonder what this sad fixation everyone has with Joan D'arc?

1233 - Since it is obvious that Cleopatra is much more atractive...

 

[CurtSibling]

1234 - You constantly declare war with Russia during diplomacy,
because Cathy looks as if she fell out of the ugly tree, hitting every branch on the way down...

1235 - You begin to wonder if Shaka really IS modelled on UK boxer, Frank Bruno...

 

[Raijer]

1236 - More than one person has caught you mumbling under your breath, "You will pay, Bismark... oh yes... you will PAY!"