A New Kind of Joke, the "I heard..." joke

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Gamemaster77

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Well me, my friend Kyle, and some other people were in school. We were bored in this one class, because we had relatively little to do. So, all of a sudden, I had an idea. I said to someone "I heard you spend your Friday nights editing Wikipedia articles, is that true?" We started cracking up because it was so random and out of the blue. We then started going back and forth and making more of them. We probably made more than a hundred, although many were forgotten and not as funny as others. Here are some more examples:

"I heard you went to Spain and got offered free Spanish lessons, however you declined because you didn't want to be able to hear their insults."

"I heard you made yourself a ForumSpring account so that you can ask yourself questions and feel good about yourself."

"I heard you shower with a bathing suit on."

Now, I challenge YOU civfanatics to come up with more. Remember the format is to first start with
"I heard...",add a joke, and maybe say "is that true depending on the situation".
 
"I heard you spent all day making really crappy jokes"

thats_the_joke.jpg
 
Say it five times fast... go!
 
I heard... someone coughing.
 
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