Could anyone here give me some advice on how to conquer the world?

[FearlessLeader2]

Comrade Davo, in step 46 you eliminate all resistors. I fail to understand how eliminating all functioning electronic equipment will achieve the goal of world domination. Can you explain this step in more detail?

 

[ComradeDavo]

Originally posted by FearlessLeader2
Comrade Davo, in step 46 you eliminate all resistors. I fail to understand how eliminating all functioning electronic equipment will achieve the goal of world domination. Can you explain this step in more detail?

errrr....I suggest you ignore that step and move immediately to step 48

 

[MrPresident]

Never tell the British secret agent your plan for world domination.

 

[Hades]

ComradeDavo, here are some of my questions/concerns:

Step 1: If I have a plan, I wouldn't have to ask you people. What are the "plans"?

Steps 3-7: where is Micronesia and why is it important to take it?

Step 9: There are good fertility drugs in the market what is the purpose of researching new ones?

Steps 11-12: If scientists have master the secret of the stock market and able to make a bundle why would they want to work for me?

Step 13: Isn't that a declaration of war?

Step s15-16: Austrialia is democracy if I kill a prime minister and other government officials the people would simply elect new ones.

Step 24: detail plan of such operation is required.

Steps 29-33: I don't think the money and the power of australia army alone can defeat the US.

Steps 35+: why monkeys and not fruit flies?

 

[Richard III]

Just read that Canadian World Domination site.

LOL!

 

[ComradeDavo]

Originally posted by Hades
ComradeDavo, here are some of my questions/concerns:

Step 1: If I have a plan, I wouldn't have to ask you people. What are the "plans"?

Steps 3-7: where is Micronesia and why is it important to take it?

Step 9: There are good fertility drugs in the market what is the purpose of researching new ones?

Steps 11-12: If scientists have master the secret of the stock market and able to make a bundle why would they want to work for me?

Step 13: Isn't that a declaration of war?

Step s15-16: Austrialia is democracy if I kill a prime minister and other government officials the people would simply elect new ones.

Step 24: detail plan of such operation is required.

Steps 29-33: I don't think the money and the power of australia army alone can defeat the US.

Steps 35+: why monkeys and not fruit flies?

1) ..um...errrrr....

3 - 7) Micronesia is the key to control of this planet!

9) errr....

11 - 12)coz they are your loyal minions!

13)possibly

15 - 16) but ze country would be destabilized!

24)hhmm....

29 - 33)ya never know

35+)Becuase Monkey's rule!

gah..it's only verion 1.2 anyways....



liek I said, just go to step 48!

 

[CornMaster]

As did I.

The resentiful Canadian.

 

[Narz]

Most people are spineless without strong leadership so all one has to do is get some very strong leaders on your side whom you can trust and assasinate all those who oppose you.

To conquer the world one needs a ton of confidence and not alot of weaknesses. The problem with guys like Napolean and Hitler was that they had inferiority complexes and many bad habits, plus a bit too much pride. The only way to get follows is to have them truly believe that you can win, and if you don't believe that you can yourself no one but the weak will follow.

I like the idea of mind-control and of monkeys helping out. I believe a monkey-army is an excellent idea and can be used to spread fear among those who opposed me (if a monkey burst into your home with a machine gun, wouldn't you be terrified? )

The world is just too big though, too many people, and why would it be worth conquering, free will is too strong and eventually you'd be assasinated by another who sought your role. Even if you could someone survive you'd have to live life looking over your shoulder every moment, expecting death around every corner and poison in every bowl of soup and thats no way to live.

My plan is to become rich, buy my own semi-tropical island and move in my close friends and associates, then bring about 1000 or so intelligent and skilled people (some butchers and bakers and candlestickmakers, etc. etc.). When tax season comes along we peacefully suceed from the United States of America, declaring our independence and self-sufficiency. On this beautiful island I live out the rest of my life with my beautiful harem and good friends, leaving only occasionally to travel the countries of the world, having adventures and living richly. Live and let live, thats my motto (except towards my enemies of course) .

- Narz

 

[EdwardTking]

Easy: Just 6 Steps


1) Undergo plastic surgery to look like Bill Gates.

2) Take elocution lessons to talk like Bill Gates.

3) Take acting lessons to move and walk like Bill Gates.

4) Play Civ for next 10 years or however long it
takes Bill Gates to complete world conquest.

5) Kill Bill Gates (when no one else is looking).

6) Replace Bill Gates.

Take care to watchout for other Bill Gates
clones who may have the same idea.

PS: Who did Woody Allen remind you of in Casino Royale?

 

[Lord Lolig]

Right now, I, myself, am raising a large army to take over the planet. You can join me if you like - the way I am going to conquer the world is investing heavily into "Time Machine Research". Once my ingenous scientists come up with a remote control to rewind the tape of history and send my giant technologized army and I to about 100-200 years into the past, i will start a full out invasion of the entire planet

 

[vonork]

Make the people aware of how many atrocities every government has done(or have fail to act against because of some reason), minor and major... then watch as the world falls into anarchy... step in and take over... done. (Oh, yeah - let no one know about your atrocities)

 

[Perfection]

I can't tell you my plan because it would ruin the suprise on the world below, but I will say that it involves the use of a TI-89 graphing calculator

 

[Simon Darkshade]

Originally posted by ComradeDavo
15 - 16) but ze country would be destabilized!

And who would take control of the country if it were destabilized? Certainly not a spotty teenager from the other side of the world.
No, it would be a ripe opportunity for the Fascist take-over plans to be put into immediate action.

 

[ComradeDavo]

Originally posted by Simon Darkshade


And who would take control of the country if it were destabilized? Certainly not a spotty teenager from the other side of the world.
No, it would be a ripe opportunity for the Fascist take-over plans to be put into immediate action.

I have a rival I see.....

 

[Gerard]

oops.

 

[Gerard]

Originally posted by ComradeDavo
Here are my world domination plans: (taken from my website, the link's in my profile)

step 1) make plans whilst playing imperial march music

step 2) check plans

step 3) gain support in Micronesia
.......................................................
step 48) get drunk

Comrade, I start with your plan, but I haven't enough money to go to Micronesia, so I had to abort.
Anyway, I move directly to step 48.

 

[HotDog Fish]

No wonder why I always fail to take over the Earth! I always start with 48 and go on from there!

 

[Zarn]

1) join NATO (if you don't live in a NATO nation, move)
2) climb the ranks
3) act like Jesse Jackson, but in a militaric way and complain about third world nations
4) firmly establish yourself as Supreme Allied Commander of NATO
5) get the militants of NATO and the its nations to love you by giving them alot of beer and cigars, so they will do what you want.
6) sieze control of the NATo nations, using their own militaries
7) take over the allies of NATO
8) make militaries from those nations and give them beer and cigars
9) take out all the nations with populations under 50,000,000
10) repeat step 8
11) take out nationns with populations from 50 million to 200 million
12) repeat step 8
13) take over India
14) repeat step 8
15) take China
16) repeat step 8
17) Now you are ready to take over Antartica, but beware, because those penguins are tough.
18) give your position up to me

 

[God]

1) Ask Pinky and the Brain to help you conquer the world.

 

[onejayhawk]

First you engage a large alien race to supply the obstacle. Then you employ superior political acumen to gain the trust of the best generals while gaining the confidence of the masses of people. When the war breaks out, wait until it seems hopeless, then rally the people for a big push to drive out the aliens. When it is over have the people nominate you eader of the world in the face of the coninuing manace.

Just watch Star Wars. The Emperor in making shows the proper methods.

J