Fake stupid newbie's questions

[Jason Fox]

Subject - Help! Can't build Invincible Spearman!

Post 1 - I keep reading about these units on this forum but all my spearman have died, so i know I'm not making the right one. Which civ gets the Invincible Spearman?

Post 2 - Oh wait, is it the Impi? I'll try that.

Post 3 - Okay, the Impi is faster but not invincible. I can't find it! Do I need a patch or something? Please help, I really want to use this unit!

Post 4 - I found it, never mind. I thought it was a Hoplite. They are good but two in a row lost when they attacked Germany's spearman, so I found out Germany has them! Time to play as them!

Post 5 - I can't find them!!! I'm playing as Germany but there's only regular spearman. I thouhgt maybe they weren't listed as invincible but when I made three of them and invaded France they lost to France's spearman at the first city! So it's France that makes them!

Post 6 - This game Russia has them??? Is there only one per game assigned to a random civ? Is there anyway to make sure you get them to start? Someone else please post on this thread with a little help, please?

 

[.:KNAS:.]

This is not a question, just a bold statement.....

I like to keep atleast two units in my cities

 

[monkeyman116]

(CivII)
Why cant i flirt with the Viking Emissary?
What does this little black guy do? I've been waiting hours and he still hasn't done any thing. He just keeps flashing.

 

[Paalikles]

Here's one from the Civ3-GD forum:
How can I delete saves

Edit: This is a real one though.
Funny imho

 

[BCLG100]

whats wrong with that some people dont know its not that stupid its justa newbie question

 

[gunning1]

What is spam?

How do I spam?

Is it good to spam?

Do many people spam?

Is it fun to spam?

Why isn't every Civilization on the game?

 

[trader/warrior]

Originally posted by SKILORD

Why is Thunderfall in charge?

i actually asked him about that once

 

[VanillaCube]

Were can I get the patch to upgrade CivII into CivIII?
what store do I go to to buy the patches?
do I then stick the patch directly on the CD?
I can't find the pause button! were is it?
whats this site for?
howcome I cant download CivIII in the CivIII download section?
were are my shoes?
who are you?
Have any of you ever heard of a game called Civ?
I have plenty of Food Icons in my box but I can't find out how to make my people eat.
How come the game dosen't save were I was when I turn off the computer?
Is that a glitch?
how do I save it?
I can't find anystore that sells Civ so were can I get it?
Can I play the Original Civ if I have the CivII or CivIII CD?
what does Rotflmao mean? Is it a Civ term?
when making a hamsandwitch do I put the ham bettween the two slices of bread?
but then were does the Chesse go?
My City is starving! can I feed them that HamSandwitch?
what do all these words on the screen mean?
how do I find out what the topic on this thread is?
what is the topic on this thread?
whats a newbie?

 

[Simon Darkshade]

"I tried to install the CD on my computer, but the tape player ate it up."

"How come the Romans built the Great Wall? They didn't do that! This Meier bloke knows nothing about history!!!!"

"How come I do nothing but produce militia?"

"Hey, I won at Chieftan level! I ROOOOLLLLL!!! U R all M!N3!!!!!"

"Thunderfall? That's a nice name. What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?"

"Hey, Mr. so-called "Mod"? Who gave u the rights to the earth!!!?"

"I'm having trouble connecting with some of my DLs."

"Today I ate a crayon."

"Good afternoon, infidels. I would like to take a few minutes of your time doing some recruting for the Symbionese Liberation Army."

"My mommy says computer games make Baby Jesus cry."

"Hey, check out this great link to All Star Studs.com...."

 

[Pillager]

"Is the Middle East ever discussed here?"

"Is that Simon Darkshade chap really a fascist?"

 

[Rodgers]

Poll: How many people have you slept with?

How do you post a poll properly?

How do you insert a quote?

Why was my thread on how many people you have slept with deleted?

 

[gunning1]

My mom said that Civ. 3 is from the devil, is this true?

She also said that video games will rot your brain out, is this true with computer games too.

 

[:)civ2]

Why can't i edit other peopls threads?
Why can't i break the rules without getting kicked out?
Why does China allways attack me after i eat food?
Why do they say i need to increase my medication?Can i increase my medication?What would happen Tell me Abraham lincon(Guy talkin to the com.)
Why are there so many people here?

 

[Perfection]

Why can't I win at diety?
What does the button that looks like a (Insert Random Word here) do?
Why can't I puch the emissary?
What do settlers do?
How do I save?
Why Is the american leader always lincoln, what about Nixon and washington.
I can lead my spearman to water, but I can't make it swim.
Okay, I just started and this is my first game, Why can't I build tanks.
What does CIV stand for?

 

[:)civ2]

why can't i eat the food icons?
why are the people mad all the time?
whats an aministrator?
Is china a real country?
weres persia i cant find it on a map?
why does germany have panzers and america have tanks?
why wont my worker move?
My cd has an crack in it will it work?

 

[gunning1]

My mom always said life is like Civ. 3. Well, I keep dying. Is this bad? What does this mean?

 

[Fez_Monk]

How do I change my username?- Me

Why do the mods hate me?- Not me

Why was I banned?- Me

"u r all gay *****"- HARDMAN (although, when you think about it, it makes sense...)

"I can't wait to see the day when bombs will fall on America and New York City. Can you imagine that? " - MIG21

 

[omichyron]

"How do you make these guys cross water?"
"Why doesn't the goto command let my guys go across the ocean?"
"Wow, I have iron working. My militias must be really good now, right?"
"How do you open the city window?"

These were all said by me, probably about 7 years ago, when I first played the original civ. Admittedly, I didn't ask them on the forum. I asked my friend, who was just as clueless as I was. As a result, I played the game for about a year without being able to open the city screen unless something was built there that gave the option to change production, or the city went into civil disorder, or something. It made the game seem really weird. At least I figured out how to build units other than militias and how to cross water, though....

 

[:)civ2]

Whats an avatar?
How do i get an avatar?
Why can't we say cuse words?
All me about a month ago

 

[Perfection]

Originally posted by civ2

My cd has an crack in it will it work?

My CD came with a hole in the middle of it. Should I return it for a non-defective one?