What I like to do is see if they will gift me anything just before I declare war. Hey Isabella, can you spare 400 for poor old me? Only too happy to help a friend. Great, now I declare war on you!
i figured everybody does that to have upgrade money hahaha! i know i do. i've never thought about it as evil, either. i think of it as "all's fair in love and war." oh did i forget to mention we're about to be at war? oopsies. it kinda does sound evil typed out that way i suppose. but wow, i thought we all did it, not in a justify it to myself "everybody does it so it's ok to do it" way but it just didn't occur to me that people don't do it!
to me it's a game, and it's completely separate from my character/personal beliefs /shrug. i love the mild-mannered grandma-type in the civanon ads. i forget what she says that totally cracks me up in the video, but her words on the webpage are "I've been attending CivAnon meetings for approximately 18 months now. Partly because I began to get a perverse thrill out of wiping out entire civilizations with atomic intercontinental ballistic weaponry, and partly because they serve cake at the meetings. I like to kill, that's true. But I like cake even more."
on the other hand, i do feel guilty when i have to, say, kill hatty, after she's been nice all game. such a cute pout when i have to deny her a request, and when she says "That's not very nice" i have to agree with her, but i can't be nice to everybody all the time, it's not called "Learning to be Nice" it's called "Civilization IV" silly girl. and when it's your turn to die, i have to kill you. and when gandhi gives me dirty looks, ouch. his dirty looks are the worst!!!
i love talking to the AI after i build a wonder, to see if they're all of a sudden rich and have any money i should take off their hands in a tech trade deal or something. so fun, knowing you beat them to a wonder and can often profit from their attempt at it. heck, i check their wallets every time anybody finishes a wonder. "cha-CHING!" do some consider that kind of opportunism unethical?