Joe Schmoe Game

SpikeSpiegelJKD

Chieftain
Joined
Feb 23, 2003
Messages
78
Location
Washington State, U.S.
I just felt like documenting a normal game of mine. This is one of my few Deity level games... I usually play on King. So don't be overwhelmed at my suckage. It's all totally factual, I just added a story line to it, if you can call it that.

Random Game

Civ Babylonians
Difficulty Deity
Size Normal
Barbarians Raging Hordes
Rules Standard

4000 BC: A man named Hammurabi in a tribe called the Babylonians rallied his people to form a powerful civilization. He founded a city, Babylon, and it thrived on the wheat-covered plains and grasslands. He sent half of the tribe to form another city nearby.

3800 : Hammurabi recieved news that the city of Ur had been founded on a good location just east of Babylon.

3750 : Hammurabi sent out a warrior group from Babylon to explore and map the nearby mysterious countryside.

3650 : Scientists in Babylon discovered a mixture of metals called bronze that could be used in construction and new weapons.

3150 : Babylonian soldiers began riding horses and using them for transportation and combat.

2500 : Nineveh was founded just north of Babylon.

2250 : Southwest of Babylon, a phalanx group encountered a tribe that used a shooting weapon called the bow.

2000 : Ashur was founded to the northwest of Nineveh.

1950 : Native tribes southwest of Babylon show a visiting Phalanx group the ways of ceremonial burial. This is a major step in the Babylonian's quest to becoming more civilized.

1400 : The city of Ellipi was founded southwest of Babylon. By this time the Babylonians had concluded from their exploration and mapping that they were on an island that will be covered with the addition of one more city. The south and middle were grasslands and plains, while the north half of the island was covered in great pine forests.

850 : Emperor Hammurabi gave the people an alphabet and writing that would be the standard of all communication for thousands of years to come. The city of Akkad was founded on the northwest side of a lake near Babylon.

600 : A boat with distinctive markings (purple) attacked Ur, and killed a group of warriors guarding that city.

525 : Hammurabi began instituting a formal code of laws, governing the people further.

325 : Ellipi farmers started irrigating the lands efficiently, allowing the Babylonian civilization to begin rapidly growing.

175 : The citizens of Nineveh erected a giant statue called the Colossus in Hammurabi's likeness.

160 AD: Hammurabi realized that costs from city improvements such as temples, granaries, and libraries would eventually bankrupt the treasury. A revolution was called to find a more economically efficient government than the despotism that had ruled for the past 4000 years. Not only that, but corruption was taking half the further cities' production and commerce.

220 : After 60 years of anarchy, a new government was finally formulated and put into use. Hammurabi was proclaimed Consul of the new Babylonian Republic.

240 : Extreme problems arose as the newly 'independent' cities, no longer being suppressed by the military's martial law, expressed their unhapiness with their conditions. Hammurabi tried giving the people more luxuries until the citizens of Ashur completed the Hanging Gardens, which would please many citizens.

260 : Mass unrest continued so the government quickly built temples, hired entertainers and further increased luxuries.

280 : After 60 years of anarchy, after the new government was allegedly set in place, the Babylonian Republic gained control and won the hearts of its fickle citizens.

400 : Hundreds of years in the making, the Hanging Gardens were finally completed in Ashur. This allowed the Republic to focus more on economy and military and less on pleasing the people. Following this event, all of the cities of Babylonia began celebrating their great accomplishments. At about this time the decision was made to get boats as soon as possible and look for new lands, new economic opportunities, but most of all, new people to exploit.

460 : The first census was held and the population of Babylon was found to be approximately 600,000 citizens.

500 : A party of foreign phalanxes on a boat landed near Ellipi. Hammurabi hoped to contact them, make peace, and further better both of their civilizations. However, while looking through early hyroglyphs and writings, it is found that the markings these people bear are the same as an ancient boat that attacked Ur centuries before.

520 : The Golden Age of Philosophy began in Babylon. The unknown phalanxes headed north toward Babylon, assumingly to meet with the heads of the Republic.

540 : The strange phalanxes arrived in Babylon, and Consul Hammurabi himself meets with them. The foreigners did not speak Babylonian, but they both did their best to communicate. The phalanxes called themselves the Sioux, and their leader was Chief Sitting Bull. Seeing how their government was clearly very primitive and archaic (They're ruled by a Chief), Hammurabi decided to help them set up a Republic-type government. Afterwards, they smoked a pipe brought by the Sioux, and sign a peace treaty between the two nations. Something bad was probably in that pipe, as you will see later.

560 : Completely contradicting the individual Sioux's behavior twenty years later, Chief Sitting Bull demands that the Babylonians tribute him 50 gold. Having only 55 gold in the nation's coffers, Hammurabi decided to give it up in the name of peace.

700 : Census showed that the population of the Babylonian Republic was in excess of 800,000 citizens.

760 : A science convention of sorts was held in Babylon. Babylonian and Sioux scientists shared their secrets with each other. The Sioux had many things the Babylonians had never even considered, such as construction of durable ships like caravels. But to be fair, the same went for the Sioux, who were so primitive they still had not developed a system of writing!

840 : The Sioux had began landing rather large amounts of offensive military units right on the Babylonian mainland. This worried Hammurabi, so he gifted them 50 gold (with only 52 in treasury) to convince them to leave. After politely asking, the Sioux withdrew most of the units.

880 : A man named Jebus Crist, who performed many miracles and had great lessons for the people of Babylon to learn, was killed by Babylonian soldiers in Ashur. Afterward he was resurrected for a week, and performed many more miracles. It was then that Hammurabi decided to adopt Cristianity as the official, monotheistic religion of the Babylonian Republic. Plans for a chapel to be built in Babylon in his honor were made, and Michelangelo, an artist, was contracted for the job. Soon after the Babylonians taught the Sioux of it when the Sioux demanded the Babylonians teach them about the new religion.

900 : A few phalanxes on patrol discover that the Sioux had built a city in one of the bare spots of the Babylonian's land! After all the gifts and technology given to them, and they invaded Babylon so subversively. The people were angry that foreigners had built an enclave on their rightful continent. Consul Hammurabi asked the Senate for permission to begin a military buildup to remove the intruders. After days of debate, the Senate approved the plan.

920 : Babylon was hardly ready for a war at this time. None of the cities had barracks for proper troop care and training. Two wonders of the world were being constructed in the most productive cities. Also, their technology was dated. The BEST active unit was a bowman group, and that was only a single group. Beyond that, phalanxes were the best. The Sioux had war elephants and bowmen already in the city and patrolling the countryside. However, this intruding city was taking resources from the native cities, and this was not to be tolerated. It would be up to the four less productive cities, Ur, Ellipi, Akkad, and Ashur, to eliminate the threat. Hasty preparations were made for the conscription of men to form crusader units, and lead a crusade against the intruders.

960 : Census showed that the fertile Babylonian Republic's population now exceeded the 1,000,000 citizen mark!

1120 : The time to attack was decided. The Sioux had sent warriors and crusaders next to Babylon (in violation of the peace treaty), and this was a perfect opportunity for the Babylonians to strike. However the Senate would not allow an attack at this time! So Hammurabi cleverly decided to annoy the Sioux to the point where they would attack him.

1320 : After centuries of annoyance, and Senate interference, Hammurabi had enough. He had the military execute all of the Senate, and the nation soon after plunged into anarchy over the incident. However, Hammurabi had the military attack the city (called "Big Mound" by the Sioux), minutes after the Senate 'dissolved', and the Babylonians took the city without a single man lost.

1340 : Hammurabi got the entire civilization under his control using his now large military, and set up a new government where the Senate couldn't tell him what he could or could not do. The people no longer had a choice in matters of any kind. Hammurabi proclaimed himself king of the new Babylonian Monarchy.

1360 : The first Babylonian ship, a caravel called the Ellipian, was constructed and ready to set sail. Also this year, Michelangelo's Chapel was completed. The citizens of Babylon were proud that day.

1520 : The Ellipian returned from a long voyage to a nearby large island. Not enough crew was on hand to journey inland and explore. However, the crew had found signs of another civilization along the coast, namely, roads and irrigated land. They dubbed the land 'Pisentha'. Hammurabi made the decision to create a powerful navy/army to conquer whatever lay there. The Ellipian was then sent to explore the island's coastline further.

1560 : The Ellipian encounters a crusader on the southeast coast of Pisentha. They called themselves the Germans. Although Babylonians and Germans did meet, it would be a long time until their governments actually discussed anything.

1590 : The Ellipian finally returns to Babylon and tells Hammurabi of their tale. Hammurabi is fascinated by their tale of these strange, pale new people... but more excited, since they are the people he will most likely be attacking in his Pisentha offensive.

1610 : Another monolith to Jebus, JS Bach's Cathedral, was completed in Nineveh. After this project, the entire Babylonian civilization was dedicated to supplying the crusade.

1640 : A German caravel attacks Big Mound and is fended off by a veteran pikeman. Even more reason for the Babylonians to attack! After attention is drawn to it, Hammurabi realizes what a stupid name the city has. He renames it Hammurabisburg.

1730 : Four caravels full of crusaders and two phalanxes set sail to conquer Pisentha.

1752 : The age of exploration truly begins for the Babylonians. The army sends one crusader to scout for a city on Pisentha's coast. They find a well developed city, but it is inhabited entirely by barbarians. The crusaders destroy the barbarians within and took one of their leaders ransom for 150 gold. The city was called 'Madrid', by it's former inhabitants, but to fit the occasion, Hammurabi had it renamed Pisentha.

1754 : After the capture of Pisentha, half of the ships go off to explore the nearby sea. The other half continues shuttling troops from Babylon to Pisentha. Crusaders in Pisentha send out scouts to find the next city to conquer.

1754 : The search did not take long. Directly east of Pisentha was a German city called Heidelburg. Hammurabi rejects their offers and pleas for a peace treaty, and orders his crusaders to attack.

1756 : Caravels find the German city of Munich on the coast northwest of Heidelburg. Germans sneak attack a crusade scout east of Heidelburg. The game is on. Continent discovered west of Babylon, and colonization plans are put into immediate effect.

1760 : Heidelburg is attacked and destroyed in the fighting. Next city on the conquest road map is Munich.

1762 : Munich is attacked and captured intact. Frankfurt is discovered northwest on the coast.

1764 : Babylonian war machine is stopped temporarily when the Germans offer 300 gold and Invention for cease fire and treaty.

1768 : "Continent" west of Babylon is found to be an island about half the size of Babylon. It is named Uruk by the locals, and a city by that name is established to colonize the rest of it.

1772 : The Germans dig their own grave. They steal Feudalism from the Babylonians, giving the Babylonians valid pretext for a war. The offensive is continued against Frankfurt, and it has been found that Berlin is just south of Frankfurt. How convenient. While exploring, a diplomat found the German city of Leipzig, undermines the local gov't, and the revolting citizens join the Babylonian Kingdom. Hammurabi concludes that the conquest of Germany will be swift and bloodless... for the Babylonians at least.
 
PART TwO!

1774 : Using unmanned German fortresses for defense, Babylonian Crusaders captured Frankfurt. They then signed a cease fire with the Germans along with fifty gold.

1786 : Unknown elephants and knights landed near Ur. They called themselves the 'Greeks'. They demanded the Babylonians pay them an exorbant amount of gold, and they deny. The Greeks attack Ur with an elephant and are beaten by a pikeman. A crusader then attacks the knights in a nearby forest and destroys two knights.

1788 : Germans foolishly steal Iron Working. Offensive is resumed against Berlin. Uruk is destroyed when four barbarian knights overwhelm the defending pikeman. Colonization will just have to wait.

1790 : The desperate need for technology starts the construction of libraries in all cities as soon as possible. It's 1790 and the Babylonian's best unit is the Crusader! What if the Americans had to fight their revolution with knights?! Jebus... the Babylonians also consider stealing advances from other civs. Also... caravel expeditions around Pisentha reveal it's coastal outline. It is about 2-3 times larger than Babylon, and looks like great land to take over.

1794 : Gunpowder begins to be researched. This will revolutionize the world, and Babylonian Crusaders will no longer be able to stomp everything into the ground. Exploration at this point was revealing that even my somewhat hard won conquests were nothing compared to what was probably to come.

1796 : Hammurabi decides to attack Berlin. Only seven, original, battle hardened, veteran bad-ass Crusaders remain... will they be enough? No. Diplomats reveal that several pikemen reside in the city. That is not good for my Crusaders. Some artillery will have to be called in.

1800 : Mass panic as Hammurabisburg is attacked by a Greek Ironclad. Pikemen are no match for them... the Babylonians have inferior naval units... Babylon's only hope is to sue for peace and hope the Greeks don't land any units. The ironclad ravages all three defending pikemen groups. Reinforcements were rushed in to fill the vacuum.

1802 : Two attempts at contacting the Greeks ended in "something about endless chatter". Babylonians have no choice but to try and fend off this monster. Ironclad attacked Ur and destroyed one pikeman, while being driven into the red itself.

1806 : ANOTHER ironclad shows up at Hammurabisburg. Finally the Greeks crack and Babylon gave them banking for a cease fire.

1808 : Catapult is finally ready to be used in the offensive on Berlin. Sadly, Babylon is so far behind on technology that a cannon should have been made. Caravel expeditions revealed many, many islands and continents nearby. The Babylonians don't really know where to start attacking or colonizing. What Babylon really needs is a science boost.

1812 : Decision to produce diplomats to try and sabotage Berlin's walls has been finalized. The city is just too well defended for the Babylonians to take it without superior numbers or technology. Hammurabi's prediction of a swift victory is killed and strangled with it's own intestines. He considers sieging Berlin by occupying every square so it shrinks into nothing. After all, the only good enemy is a dead one, right?

1816 : Hammurabi (finally) publicly announces that maybe all of this dictatorship, all of this throwing intellectuals into prison, maybe it's making science stagnate. He claimed that after the fall of Berlin, a Democratic form of government would be put into place before it's too late and Babylon is fifty years behind in technology. If Babylon isn't already that far behind.

Will Hammurabi take Berlin?

Will Babylon catch up in techs?

Will the fascist Greeks sign a peace treaty?

Will Babylon be able to expand?

WILL I EVER STOP ENCOUNTERING @$$HOLE CIVS?

I play using fantastic worlds... I'm attaching savegame so you can see my fruited up game.:cry:
 
Very nice.........and very long
 
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