Name users and remembering names

[azzaman333]

I'm pretty good with names, but at school i just say "Hey mate" or something similar.

 

[Chieftess]

From the "Memory Book" (tape actually) a few decades ago. Attach an image to the person so you can remember it better. It's actually a study technique kids use in school, too. (atleast I did when I was a kid). Suppose someone's name is "Sue". You can invision a lawyer sueing someone. BTW, I have a good memory, so I can remember names fairly quickly though.

 

[The Condor]

I am not a name-user. That is, I do not routinely use peoples' names in conversations. I may use their names initially to engage them in conversation, but after that, I don't.

Same here. I use "dude", "sir", and/or "Ms"/"Mr" among others for the rest of the conversation if I even use them at all . I've kind of made an art out of avoiding using a person's name in a conversation!

In contrast, I had a flat-mate who would use the name of the person that she was addressing in virtually every sentence she spoke - I actually found that quite strange - or weird even.

That doesn't really bug me. Something that does however is addressing me by my last name or using it like as if it was my first name.

I have heard however, that a good way of rembering peoples' names is to use them - when you are introduced you should say 'hello <insert name here>, pleased to meet you' etc, then follow that up by using there name in the next few sentences.

Usually after around the ~35789230750237th time I hear the person's name I get it down. Before that time I really only use it in the first sentence like in your quote when I am "greeting" them.

I however, am hopeless with names.

I am too.

I can have forgotten someone's name within seconds of being told it.

Same here!

What are your views?

Umm, can you really have views on this subject?

Do you use names?

Only in the first sentence then afterwards it is forgotten and hopefully avoided.

Are you good at remembering names?

Still... nope.

Do people continually using your name when conversing with you, freak you out?

Sometimes though like I said earlier them using my last name and completely ignoring my first name exists bugs me more. Or when a person doesn't take a hint and never shuts up.

 

[MjM]

I can be good with names, saying them a few times is good, but every sentece? As you pointed out a few posts ago, it can be quite annoying.

 

[ummmm........]

I try to remember people's names because I agree that it can be impressive to them when you use it, the more infrequently you see them the better . . .

But I disagree that you should use it more than once a conversation. It's true that it can help you remember it, and I know Dale Carnegie and others recommend it, but to me it just seems so obvious when someone else is doing it . . .

 

[ainwood]

I can be good with names, saying them a few times is good, but every sentece? As you pointed out a few posts ago, it can be quite annoying. :crazyeyes:

My flatmate used to use names nearly that often! Couple this with the fact that about every 5th sentence was also a cliche ('I was mad, it was red-rag to a bull'), she was certainly 'interesting'

I am quite surprised with the number of people who call each other 'dude'.

 

[classical_hero]

I am not a name-user. That is, I do not routinely use peoples' names in conversations. I may use their names initially to engage them in conversation, but after that, I don't.

In contrast, I had a flat-mate who would use the name of the person that she was addressing in virtually every sentence she spoke - I actually found that quite strange - or weird even.

I have heard however, that a good way of rembering peoples' names is to use them - when you are introduced you should say 'hello <insert name here>, pleased to meet you' etc, then follow that up by using there name in the next few sentences.

I however, am hopeless with names. I can have forgotten someone's name within seconds of being told it. What are your views? Do you use names? Are you good at remembering names? Do people continually using your name when conversing with you, freak you out?

I must admit, but that post sums me up perfectly. I often have to ask that person what is there name after a few minutes afterwards, which can be embarassing.

 

[shortguy]

I rarely use names or titles, especially when I don't know how to address someone. Rather than "yes, sir," or "yes, ma'am," or "yes, mr./mrs. kdkdkd," etc, I prefer just to say "yes."

 

[Sahkuhnder]

I am quite surprised with the number of people who call each other 'dude'.

'Dude' is very commonly used where I live in the Western USA.

To me 'dude' is only used verbally, never in written messages. It usually is used amongst friends, but when you call a stranger dude it denotes friendly agreement, non-hostility or a mutual understanding.

Drinking buddies are frequently called 'dude'. If you bump into someone young(er), especially if it is your fault you could say something like 'oh, sorry dude'. If a stranger says something you laugh at or agree with you could also use it as 'yea dude' or 'all right dude!'. Once again a non-hostile friendly type generic name.

I have heard foreigners use 'mate' in a similar manner as described above for 'dude'.

'Buddy' used to have the same status but has lost the friendly-only tone that 'dude' implies.

 

[Lotus49]

It's easy to remember someone's name. All you have to do is 'want' to. Usually, it's the "people-persons" that actually genuinely like, and care about meeting others, and maintaining relations with them, that will remember names - simply because they choose to.

Chances are, if don't remember names at all (especially seconds after you heard them), it's because you subconsciously don't give a crap about meeting this person, can't be bothered to speak with them, and can't wait 'til they get out of your face, wasting your time. You may not realize this at the conscious level, but that is exactly what is going on in the back of your mind.

It's that simple. A matter of will power/motivation/desire, just like anything else.

 

[Winner]

Strange, when I think about it, I think I have a problem in using names in conversation (with friends and other non-family people). I use their nicknames often, but not their real names. It sounds somehow... awkward when I do.

 

[nonconformist]

A lot of people I meet is during parties and such, meanignt hat I don't remember much at all, let alone names.

 

[CartesianFart]

Sometimes i feel embarrassed of not remembering someone names and substitute a person name with ,dude,bro,chief,chick[for the females ],n%gga,homey,and some girls in Canton,Ohio sometimes when i lived there a couple of years ago[if you know them well]will let you call them b%tches,boo,shorty .

 

[classical_hero]

A lot of people I meet is during parties and such, meanignt hat I don't remember much at all, let alone names.

That is because you were drunk at the time.

 

[Till]

I'm quite good with name but if at all, i use a person's name to address her/him as in "Hello, .." or "What do you think about it, ...?". Never during an actual conversation. It would feel awkward and redundant.

 

[snarko]

It's easy to remember someone's name. All you have to do is 'want' to. Usually, it's the "people-persons" that actually genuinely like, and care about meeting others, and maintaining relations with them, that will remember names - simply because they choose to.

Chances are, if don't remember names at all (especially seconds after you heard them), it's because you subconsciously don't give a crap about meeting this person, can't be bothered to speak with them, and can't wait 'til they get out of your face, wasting your time. You may not realize this at the conscious level, but that is exactly what is going on in the back of your mind.

It's that simple. A matter of will power/motivation/desire, just like anything else.

This sounds very true (for me). I'm horrible at remembering names... but I don't care about their name until I have to use it. Then I rather avoid the situation than making sure I remember the name

 

[Hitro]

I almost never use names except when it is necessary to address someone in a conversation with several people at once.

But I can remember names very well, so I think that's unconnected.

 

[nonconformist]

But I can remember names very well, so I think that's unconnected.

your nehm vill go on ze list!

 

[BCLG100]

I say my girlfriends name so that might work with the sign of affection thing but dont normally say my mates names unless trying to attract their attention.

 

[liquid fire]

I say my girlfriends name so that might work with the sign of affection thing but dont normally say my mates names unless trying to attract their attention.

That's funny, I'm the opposite: I only ever use my wife's proper name when I am angry.