Not-So-Useful units, buildings, GPs and wonders

[Öjevind Lång]

This is my favourite (among many contenders):

Tower of Babel (Not-So-Useful Wonder)
Requires: Masonry & Polytheism.
Cost: 700.
Gives owner knowledge of every tech discovered by any civ. Every square of the World immediately turns into ocean. All civs are destroyed.

Let me see if I can contribute something. Hmm...

Civ leader: Adolf Hitler
Traits: none.
Other characteristics: none. That's because he is dead. This is announced at the start of the game, and all other civs get one happiness point for ten turns.

Civilization: Monaco
Unique Building: casino
Unique Unit: croupier. If meeing a competitor's unit, this unit forces the competitor to hand over all his money. The croupier has 200 but can only launch fiscal attacks, and 1,000.
Gains a minimum of 1,000 gold each turn.
Can only found one city.

(Hey, come to think of it, might be cool to play.)

Random event: A political nut holds you at gunpoint and forces you to watch Ann Coulter being interviewed for 48 straight hours. Finally, you grab the gun and shoot yourself. Game over.

UU: Jewish Defence League. Cost: 1,000 Can only be built in city where Judaism is present. Strength: 1. Defence: 0. Blindly attacks all other Jews and spreads anti-Jewish feelings and general unhappiness in every city where it is stationed.

UB: sauna club. Gives +1 for ten turns and then 5 for 100 turns. If you run Theocracy, it gives you + 10 forever.

 

[thekaje]

Not-So-Useful Unit:

Unionized Worker
Requires Assembly Line
All Workers automatically upgraded
Obsoletes Worker
* "Build Road" replaced by "Negotiate Highway Construction Agreement"
* "Build Farm" replaced by "Contact Dairy Farmers of [Civ], Wheat Growers of [Civ], National Association of [Civ]ian Flour and Bread Producers, Bread-Slicers' Union, etc., to Discuss Possibility of Building Farm"
* "Build Mine" replaced by "Contact International Hammer-Handle Sandpaper-ers Association, et al., and Check With Local Branch of Sierra Club"
* "Build Cottage" no longer possible because it would steal jobs.
* Before new resource can be worked, Unionized Worker must "Found Union" for that resource. This destroys the unit.
et cetera

30% chance per turn of not doing anything or doing something completely different.

 

[Joecoolyo]

Not-So-Useful Unit:

Unionized Worker
Requires Assembly Line
All Workers automatically upgraded
Obsoletes Worker
* "Build Road" replaced by "Negotiate Highway Construction Agreement"
* "Build Farm" replaced by "Contact Dairy Farmers of [Civ], Wheat Growers of [Civ], National Association of [Civ]ian Flour and Bread Producers, Bread-Slicers' Union, etc., to Discuss Possibility of Building Farm"
* "Build Mine" replaced by "Contact International Hammer-Handle Sandpaper-ers Association, et al., and Check With Local Branch of Sierra Club"
* "Build Cottage" no longer possible because it would steal jobs.
* Before new resource can be worked, Unionized Worker must "Found Union" for that resource. This destroys the unit.
et cetera

30% chance per turn of not doing anything or doing something completely different.

Best one yet

 

[sydhe]

The Not-So-Great-Spy

Detectable by enemy, transmits to you whatever information the enemy wishes you to know, whether it's true or not.

 

[sydhe]

The Mousoleum: Unique building dedicated to sacred rodents. Produces one happiness at the cost of two health.

 

[Dragonxander PR]

How about this one?:

The Mexico-USA border wall:

- Costs 2500
- Its description says it eliminates cultural influence from the most influential border civ, but it doesn't
- Requires Industrialism OR Steel
- 10% with iron, 10% with aluminum, 30% in city with foreign culture
- -2 diplo with the civ from which you want to block cultural influence
- + 2 in all cities

 

[Kark]

The Mousoleum: Unique building dedicated to sacred rodents. Produces one happiness at the cost of two health.

May be Karni Matra (Not-So-Useful Wonder)
Wikipedia

 

[Kark]

Pandemic (Not-So-Useful Random Event)
All cities in every civ: -10 for 10 turns.

Factory Farm (Not-So-Useful Building)
Requires: Assembly Line & pig or chicken (new resource).
+1, +1, -2.
Every turn: 1% chance per Factory Farm of Pandemic due to Swine flu or Bird flu.

Smithfield Foods Inc. (Not-So-Useful Corporation)
Can only be built by Great Merchant.
Requires: Corporation, Refrigeration.
Consumes: Pigs.
Every turn: 50% chance of Pandemic due to Swine flu.
Wikipedia

 

[Öjevind Lång]

Heres another one:

Unit: Lion tamer. 1 1. Available from Animal Husbandry. Has a chance to capture lions; if it fails, the lions kill it. Each turn on its way to the nearest city, there is still a chance that the captured lions will kill it. In the city, the lions will be trained to perform, and the performing lions give you an added . However, each turn there is a 50% chance that they will eat the lion tamer and then go on a rampage, savagely reducing the population of your city.

 

[Willem]

The Avro Arrow, a Canadian UU. As soon as it gets built it has to be dismantled again.

 

[Kark]

Greenpeace (Not-So-Useful Random Event)
Randomly destroys Whaling Boats.
+1 in America. +1 in Japanese & Viking Empire.

 

[Asprilla]

Greenpeace (Not-So-Useful Random Event)
Randomly destroys Whaling Boats.
+1 in America. +1 in Japanese & Viking Empire.

Not in all Viking citites, only in the Norwegian ones.

 

[Joseph Goebbels]

Balsa Raft (Not-So-Useful Unit)
Requires: Fishing & Jungle.
Naval Unit, strength 0, movement 1/2, cost 30, cargo space 1 (carries scouts, explorers, missionaries, spies, great people).
When placed in a costal square, it starts moving automatically away from the shore. If the raft lands on an island: -1 in all cities until Genetics proves that the inhabitants of the island in fact came from the other side of the ocean. (Wikipedia)
(Could also be Kon-Tiki, Not-So-Useful Unique Unit for the Vikings.)

Kudos to you!

 

[AlphaShard]

Greenpeace (Not-So-Useful Random Event)
Randomly destroys Whaling Boats.
+1 in America. +1 in Japanese & Viking Empire.

Are you under the impression that America doesn't have a whaling industry?

 

[mechaerik]

World of Warcraft, Not so useful wonder
600
Available after the Internet has been completed
+100% against animals for all units
a random less advanced civ gets a free Gold resource
Obsoletes Universities
-50% Food

You forget that last part. Not many kids being made when you build this.

 

[Kark]

Are you under the impression that America doesn't have a whaling industry?

Alaska Natives landed 41 Bowhead whales in the 2006/2007 season (and lost 22).

 

[Kark]

Not in all Viking citites, only in the Norwegian ones.

King Carl XVI Gustaf of Sweden (Not-So-Useful Great Person)
Requires: Monarchy & Hunting.
birth rate: Eh, maybe ...

And just for the sake of balance:

Princess Märtha Louise of Norway (Not-So-Useful Great Person)
Requires: Monarchy & Mysticism.
birth rate: Eh, maybe ...
+1 in every city. (No, it's not +1!)
Link to her firm: Astarte Education.

 

[sydhe]

May be Karni Matra (Not-So-Useful Wonder)
Wikipedia

That's where I got the idea.

 

[JujuLautre]

Shogunate (not so useful civic)
- available with feudalism and civil service
- all units gain +1 XP
- every unit loses its withdrawal chances
- all diplomatic exchanges, pacts and agreements are cancelled, and no new one can be concluded while the CIV is in Shogunate
- no civic change is possible until a frigate enters your cultural borders
(favourite civic of Ieyasu Tokugawa)

 

[RaidforBBQ]

Fifth gen Jet Fighter: (not so useful unit)
Requires advanced flight, level 5 air unit

- 200
- small chance of increase in cost per unit built
- +50% vs Melee Units
- +100% vs Horse Units