A big empire for little men (hopefully)

[jackelgull]

Hello, you may or may not remember me from my two previous attempts at stories- the Turkot empire, and the new world Vikings, but those stories are unfortunately closed thanks to a computer crash. Sad I know. But fear not, for the free time of vacation week has driven me to undertaken a new story with the rise from Erebus modmod as the Khazad!

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the settings: Earth Map, with the same continents as Earth, noble difficulty
Huge, marathon speed which has eighteen hundred turns (a lot I know)
with compact enforced and hallowed ground, which get rid of the Armageddon counter and the summonable civilizations.

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Now I probably should explain who the Khazad are.
They are a dwarven civilization that was driven underground by greedy humans. They survived the Age of Winter when the god Mulcarn covered the earth in ice and wiped out most of the surface dwellers and now they're ready to come above ground on the age of magic. This is their basic lore.
Mechanics wise, the Khazad are monsters of production.
Here's why:

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That building is known as the Dwarven vault. Every city the dwarves own has one. It gives production and happiness bonuses based on how much gold per city you have. In addition the dwarves have

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The dwarves also have improved siege, but in exchange for their positives, they only have access to tier one magic.

Now dear readers, before I begin, please vote for the leader of this (one day) great empire!

First is Kandros Fir!

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Financial: +1 commerce on plots with 2 commerce, double speed of money changer, markets
Imperialistic: +100% GG emergence, double production speed of settler
This guy is an imperialist pure and simple. He wants to pursue new markets zealously, by force if neccessary. No admirer of tradition, he is a pioneer, and wishes to bring his radical vision to the surface after being chased out from underground.

Now Arturus Thorne!

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Expansive: +6 health per city, double speed of granary, smoke house, salthouse, , harbor
Industrious: +50% wonder production, free promotion crafting tradition(increases rate of speed at which workers build improvements) Double speed of Dwarven Smithy, artisan workshop
This guy is an isolationist. Unlike Kandros who wants to dominate the world in response to its bad treatment of dwarves, Arturus wishes to have nothing to do with those pesky humans/ other races. Mother Kilmorph made her children perfect.

Also, give it up for Athel Revus

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He's a slave merchant and an emergent leader, so he can gain another trait based on how you play.
Slaver: Conquered cities lose half pop and gain slave unit (can be sacrificed for 30 production) per two pop lost, +10% gold in cities, free promotion slaver (15% chance for slave to be created from battle)

Finally, Reorx Veinhunter

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Another emergent leader, this guy's a miner
Veinhunter: +1 production on tiles with 2 production

So choose the leader of Khazad, and indicate if you'd be interested in a position in this story for I plan to make it interactive if there's enough interest.

 

[CaterpillarKing]

Kandros Fir

 

[TheNoob]

Kandros also subbed

 

[Matthias I]

Kandros Fir

 

[DKVM]

Reorx Veinhunter

 

[TheNoob]

DK fights the system

 

[CaterpillarKing]

Link to video.

 

[DKVM]

Imperialists are so cliche in most of these stories. I prefer to "fight the power" as you say if it means not being ordinary.

 

[CaterpillarKing]

Good point, switch to Arturus Thorne

 

[DrZomboss]

I still go Kandros Fir. Expansion is nice.

Also, where did you get the extra leader? FfH 2 features only Kandros and Arturus. What addon is it?

 

[jackelgull]

Seems like the votes are in and Kandros has won, yes!

This is the rise from erebus modmod

 

[DrZomboss]

This is the rise from erebus modmod

Seems like I need to get this one

 

[jackelgull]

A ragtag group of Khazad stumble onto the surface from their home in the Underhomme under the guidance of Kandros Fir, the author of Imperialism and you: What it is, how to do it and why you should do it. Kandros promptly settles a city in the first spot the dwarves come across on the surface, naming it Khazak. He really wanted to name it after himself, but his advisers convinced him it seemed too egotistical and thus he named after his people the next best thing.

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Kandros quickly crowned himself despot on the basis that he had the shiniest staff of gold, so people should follow him. He established a religion dedicated to worshiping himself known as Kandrosism. It never caught on, but the empire was still stuck on religion as a social value anyways. The labor was tribal, though there was no good reason for it to be so. And finally, the economy was decentralized, although there was only one friggin city with a small group of refugees trying to practice their belief in imperialism and dwarven superiority.

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Kandros commissions an explorer to map the surroundings of his (future) domain. Kandors really hopes to find a suitable site to build Kandrosland, a themepark based around himself, with a water slide down Kandros' gullet, climbing Kandros' beard, and riding a fast elevator up and down Kandros' private parts.

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In the year 12, a group of goblins approach,

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only to turn away

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The scout comes across a group of villagers who survived the Age of Ice. They are so awe struck by the mere hand writing of Kandros ordering any villagers his scout comes across to give the dwarven empire everything they have that they comply. Any screams and beatdowns you hear are purely your imagination

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In turn 19, a player cast for the horde, whatever that means. kandros theorizes that the gods are sending the message that someday in response to dwarven manifest destiny, a group of orcs will make their last stand screaming "For the Horde" as they brandish their overcompensating large clubs and run screaming in a futile stand against the invincible dwarven war machine. Quite an imagination considering we only have four warriors so far.

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The broken sepulcher and tower of eyes are found close together. The scout decides to climb the tower of eyes to check if he can "see" anything. Kandros thought that joke was simply too funny to leave out. Please laugh, or he'll make my life hell. Being his chronicler is a tiring job.

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It seems the scout has run into a spot of trouble at one of the villages who don't take to Kandros' proclamation kindly, and have axemen... Give that axeman a right Scott, go down fighting. You call that an uppercut?!!! I've seen cats do better and they don't have hands!!!! But despite his efforts Scott doesn't defeat Ginormous the axeman. Oh and neither does the scout, but I didn't bet 200 Firs on him. And so ends the first scouting expedition.

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A second smaller expedition is sent out to plunder, contact a nearby village. The scout finds 171 Firs, then tests his luck and loots an old abandoned creepy lair for 255 Firs. Kandros is overjoyed and so is the empire as they swim in their overflowing vaults of gold; consequently, productivity increases because the first rule of being a dwarf is if it's worth doing, it is worth doing better for more money.

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By turn 59, the dwarves are now unlocking the secrets of the calender, because Kandros really wants to make a calender starting on his birthday, with a years system that goes, before Kandros, and after the most benevolent, glorious, great despot Kandros.

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In the year 62, the first true barbarian invasion happens. Kandros dispatches a legion of warriors and cowers behind the tents as they make battle leads them to victory.

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And right after that, another one

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A veteran legion facing an enemy they've beaten before... Need I go over the results?

Oh, a unicorn is spotted outside of Khazad. Some bleeding heart environmentalists want to save it. They insist it will be the last pure thing on earth before dwarven kind will destroy it with our bottomless greed, bah, they should just get their head out of their bums and go to work like real dwarves, none of this nonsense of concern for the weak and the poor ugh, but this is a Kandros knows best state, and Kandros kills it, and sells the horn for money. Cause the second rule of being a dwarf- everything is business.

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Then the axe man that killed the scout shows up, stronger than ever DUNH, DUNH DUNNNN!!!!!!!!! He chases Kandros' workers in and out of the city before attacking the city itself. The first defender dies his last words, "tell my wife she can't have my money, even over my dead body!!!!", and the dwarven empire is saved by the fact that there are two defenders! The last defender of Khazak attacks the severely weakened axe man and shortens him by a head.

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And in the year 113 AK (After Kandros) Kandros launches the first settling mission while studying festivals, cause he wants to preach his awesomeness by throwing a party, free to get into, but costing money to buy food and drink. A dwarf's got to make a profit at all times bro

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The first cottage for those fancy smamcy suburban dwellers is built. I heard it'll make us all smarter, but I prefer the cramped close city with its smog, cause smog has character and its dirt is an honest dirt.

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Once again, barbarians, if only we could build a Great Wall to keep them out for good. But think about the prices! we'd have to get so much labor and actually pay them (I don't think we can get away with an IOU note this time). (For those who don't know, there is no great Wall in this modmod)

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Oh and mushrooms! Dwarves are crazy for mushrooms. They're delicious and can make for good acid trips ( I really hope I don't end up getting in a brawl with the cops insisting I'm God and pissing in the cop cart like Bob did back in the Underhomme).

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[CaterpillarKing]

Wait, you mine the mushrooms?

 

[Dumanios]

Subbed.

 

[Tambien]

This looks like a really interesting mod, and I love your story! Keep it up!

 

[jackelgull]

A volcano explodes. Kandros claims that no one was injured because the volcano was too afraid of upsetting him. This inducts the popular sayings known as Kandros facts into Dwarven vernacular.

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The people in Khazad believe they've found a witch cursing all of their hard earned gold into dust. Kandros refuses to execute her, not because he cares one wit about justice, but because the lady offers him a nice bribe if he doesn't, and because he has to remind the citizens that this isn't a democracy

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A bunch of texts are found. Kandros decides to hand them out to researchers to complete the exploration text faster, because the first step to imperializing a place was to map out the place you were going to imperialize, and exploration was the prerequisite to cartography.

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in the year 166 AK, the first dwarven mine is commissioned, with mercenaries from the underhomme paid to defend it. It isn't until 3 years later that Kandros realized he had been hypnotized by the jingle and that the mercenaries were an unnecessary drain on our gold income. These mercenaries quickly vanish, never to be seen again... Third rule of being a dwarf- if you're the one getting a good deal, it's honest business, if it's you that got the worse deal, you've been ripped off, and need to deal with it harshly.

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In 168 AK, a skeleton invades and a warrior is dispatched to meet it on the plain of battle. Kandros is relieved, what good is an empire no barbarians feel tempted to plunder and loot?

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In 173 AK, restless pioneers fleeing ruthless creditors from the Underhomme found a new home in Halowell, and begin to build a market. (OOC: For those who might be confused, in Rife, markets come at festivals and give 3 gold but -1 science, and since Kandros is both builds settlers faster and builds markets faster, you can see how I'm going to fund expansion)

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The new city has its problems

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An event pops up, ad Kandros grudgingly forks over some gold, but no dice, the elder doesn't appear.

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Kandros recieves the message Lucian has been killed. No one is quite sure what to make of this, but Kandros insists that it means the Doviello are weakened as they lost their hero. That still doesn't clear the confusion, no one has heard of the Doviello. This statement is simply chalked up to Kandros' usual insanity, eccentricity.

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The gods decide to bless "good" civilizations with a Great Prophet, fostering laziness, rather than making their followers toil with their blood, sweat and tears like Mother Kilmorph has done with her children the dwarves. This is one step away from charity *shudder*.

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Kandros adopts city states and grudgingly cedes power to local mayors of cities, drastically reducing maintenance costs; however, to keep a firm gr(ass)p of power, every six months mayors were required to report back to Kandros with reports on their respective cities. Kandros devised more elaborate rituals to reinforce his power, rumors of a ritual in which the mayors offered their faces for Kandros to sit on spread, and the expression "ass kissing" is inducted into dwarven vernacular.

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During this transition period in which everything is sorting itself out, a larger than usual wave of barbarians crosses the borders. Something tells me they don't citizenship into our illustrious empire... Nevertheless, they are repelled.

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a new settling mission is conducted, this time by a group of refugees who arrive only two steps ahead of the law. Most of them are wanted for fraud, with some drunkards and malcontents in the mix. Kandros tells the officers chasing them they'd have a better chance at getting laid then arresting his citizens.

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In 223 AK, Riylod is settled next to the Broken Sepulchre. It has never caused any problems, but the eerir noises coming from the place drive property prices in the city down.

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The rice patty has been built despite the continuous presence of barbarian centaur archer nearby. For some reason the beast seems content shooting volley after volley of ineffectual arrows rather than moving offensively.

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Again, skeleton attack. They've become so common that skeletons are officially removed off the 101 scariest things in the Dwarven Empire. Look, this one doesn't even stay to fight!

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A dwarven legion gently reminds the centaur savages that Riylood belongs to Kandros

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The gods decide to give the industrious dwarven nation a little boost in our aim to research mystic chants. Kandros figures he can get more people to worship him if he can come up with a catchy tune proclaiming his awesomeness.

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People are finally recognizing the greatness of the dwarven nation. All hail Kandros!! This comes after the dwarves failed to make the list of most militarily powerful nations twice and most advanced civilizations once. These lists are banned in the empire and their writers mysteriously disappear, as I might as well if I keep talking about them. Moving along.

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The second dwarven scouting expedition makes it to the sea before running afoul a giant spider and getting eaten. It has now been established that "going scouting" is an euphemism for suicide, or "Holy , I pissed off someone powerful, my life is over."

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Another unicorn, too stupid to learn from the fate of its predecessor appears. Do we show it any more mercy than last time? Of course not.

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(OOC: If anyone is confused about anything, feel free to ask me to clarify or explain. And I hope you all enjoy)

 

[TheNoob]

Here, jackelgull, I think you forgot this pic:

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[DKVM]

Kandros recieves the message Lucian has been killed. No one is quite sure what to make of this, but Kandros insists that it means the Doviello are weakened as they lost their hero. That still doesn't clear the confusion, no one has heard of the Doviello. This statement is simply chalked up to Kandros' usual insanity, eccentricity.

You used the same image as the one before it here.

 

[jackelgull]

Fixed, thanks.