Articles in the Civ newspaper

[allhailIndia]

It is a great pity there is no tabloids improvement in Civ or else these messages would have appeared while I played.


1.ELIZABETH IS A COW!!

Frustrated by the fact that the Senate would not allow him to declare war on England for their misdeeds, President AllhailIndia had to send a diplomatic note to Queen Elizabeth calling her "an oversize, horse faced, peanut brained, cow.". Needless to say, the note found its way into the painful regions of our Ambassador in London.

2.LEONARDO TAKES MUSIC CLASSES

With the completion of an Inventor's workshop in Rome, Leonardo, the Indian Inventor, was forced to switch his plans to building a cathedral and promote the music and arts. Mr. Da Vinci clearly did not look happy when his latest invention, "The Bong", was used to build Organ pipes.

3.PRIMETIME TV SHOW DEFEATS INDIANS
In a bizzare turn of events, the Indian 8th Modern Armor Division was caught unawares by Babylonian Pikemen and beaten as they were monentarily "distracted", by the popular show, "Baywatch" and were caught unawares when they found Pikes under their noses. The Military Dept. has offered no other explanation.

Got anymore wacky headlines

 

[philippe]

lol

 

[allhailIndia]

Here's more


THE NEW TASTE OF STEEL

Emperor Shaka's ridiculous attempt at starting war with the Indians has come to a disastrous ending. The last few remnants of the Zulu warriors were dispatched to the Great Hunting Ground, by our Mechanized divisions and Emperor Shaka himself in prison. Quite ironically he was heard complaining about the swill, though he had promised to make us taste 'his' steel at the start of the war.


TEEPEE TO THE UN BUILDING

 

[allhailIndia]

Here's more


THE GREATEST UPRISING
Today, the 300,000 people of Pasargadae overthrew the rule of the Indian, and reverted back to the Persian empire. They disguised their revolt as a peace march and then opened fire on the troops, catching them unawares with their matchlock muskets. Later, the same mob overran the Indian 6th,14th,15th and 23rd Tank units and retook the city with few casualties.


REVOLUTION AGAIN!!??

Though our empire is in a general state of chaost, it seems that our leader has not had enough and wanted another revolution to begin in the midst of anarchy. Fortunately, it turned out that our leader had forgotten to take his medication and had lost his mind almost comlpetely. A timely reminder from his Domestic Advisor Ms. Manej Hommafairs.

 

[philippe]

aaaahaahahahahahalol!

 

[allhailIndia]

phillipe, STOP SPAMMING AND START POSTING

 

[philippe]

emperor hiawatha chosen as ugliest man ever!

today in cincinnati there was the elections for ugliest man ever.
hiawatha won.he was the only candidate.
hiawathe toke the trofee began crying of happiness and was never seen again....