Between a nuke and hard place

[TrialAndError]

First post here, just starting playing CIV IV (am I a few years late?) so I thought I'd share a sort of funny screen grab from my second game ever.

Isabella, you are not helping:



As the story goes: Late game world war. I share Africa with the Vikings and have 90% of the New World besides some small Viking cities. The Ethiopians decided to try and take over Europe and Asia without asking me. They moved and took about 8 or 9 cities in Europe and Asia very quickly, leading me to wonder how large their main attack force must have been. While they were out shopping for cities, I moved a large group to Europe via transport (ugh) and started taking the lightly defended Ethiopian cities from behind.

My plan: to cut off their manufacturing capability quickly, leaving their main attack force without reinforcements and dwindled from their deep push into foreign territory. I took about 5 of their largest cities with marginal resistance and thought in the process I also wiped out what was left of their main force. Well, I didn't. Rolling back from their Eastern front came a stack of 20 or so Modern Armor with a lot of experience to boot.
They counterattacked and took back two of their own cities and a lot of my tanks in the process. By some stroke of luck though, the scene in the grab played out: I had the main Ethiopian tank force all on one tile, within range of my main arsenal of tactical nukes! How awesome is that?! I imagined the carnage and giggled to myself as I readied the first nuke. Then the tile was gray. What? Turns out Isabella had a few infantry in an adjacent tile. One or two units. She was a "Friendly", so I couldn't fire. I seriously thought about declaring war against her just to nuke them all; I mean honestly, is there any loyalty in war? But she was a vassal of the Vikings, who I could NOT afford a war with on my home terf, so I couldn't. Next turn and the main stack had disappeared. Probably to attack me later. Stupid Isabella, ruined everything.

 

[spaceman98]

 

[Dumanios]

Couldn't you have just hit the tile Southwest of Aksum, though?

 

[hoplitejoe]

Welcome to the forum

 

[Tambien]

Couldn't you have just hit the tile Southwest of Aksum, though?

Yeah.....

Anyway,

Welcome to the forums!

We won't eat you, of course.

If anyone tells you that they are more epic than I am, they are lying. Especially if their name is METY.

 

[Daedwartin]

Welcome, TrialAndError, to the land where the strong control all and the weak "cultured" people burn, where the advanced destroy the primitive, where the UN is a tool for world domination, where democracy is just a means of building things quicker while communism is the most effective economy for large empires more often than not, where those who conquer the quickest and than keep control of their spoils are the most respected, where men love to start as cavemen on their trip 2 the cosmos, the heavens fall twice with incantations of unbelievable power, where the ultimate religious authority is a white, radioactive rock that can burst forth sometimes with the radiance of a thousand suns[1], where the forecast is continued war in a hell-hole of eternal war with a 100% chance of mushroom clouds.

This is Civfanatics. Only The the strong will flourish under its members iron rule and titanium fists. The weak will be perished, the strong ganged on, the cunning survive.

 

[trexeric]

That's good, we have a new welcome post.

Anyway, welcome to the forums and I enjoyed reading this.

 

[SamSniped]

If anyone tells you that they are more epic than I am, they are lying. Especially if their name is METY.

Somehow, I had forgot about the Epic Wars for a while
We need more new S&Ters!

Welcome, TrialAndError, to the land where the strong control all and the weak "cultured" people burn, where the advanced destroy the primitive, where the UN is a tool for world domination, where democracy is just a means of building things quicker while communism is the most effective economy for large empires more often than not, where those who conquer the quickest and than keep control of their spoils are the most respected, where men love to start as cavemen on their trip 2 the cosmos, the heavens fall twice with incantations of unbelievable power, where the ultimate religious authority is a white, radioactive rock that can burst forth sometimes with the radiance of a thousand suns[1], where the forecast is continued war in a hell-hole of eternal war with a 100% chance of mushroom clouds.

This is Civfanatics. Only The the strong will flourish under its members iron rule and titanium fists. The weak will be perished, the strong ganged on, the cunning survive.

That is the new official description for Civ4

@TrialandError-Welcome to the forums! I'm the resident sniper, patriotic american, a damn good storyteller, modder, and the most sane out of everyone here. Have a good time, and leave your sanity at the door. I hope to see more stories in the future!
And always remember,

-SamSniped

PS- and, of course, nice story!

 

[Daedwartin]

Somehow, I had forgot about the Epic Wars for a while
We need more new S&Ters!

Uh-oh. ALL MEN INTO THE BUNKERS! NOT A DRILL!
I think Epic War 2 is about to start...
I side with Tambein...
For Now

 

[Dumanios]

Link to video.

After months of peace in the world of Civfanatics, Stories and Tales is once again mobilizing for war. The first war was a hopeless stalemate, but now, the forces of the Thanyou Empire and the Tambien Duchy mobilize once more. The first war nearly split Stories and Tales in two, but with the second Epic War nearing, Stories and Tales may be destroyed for good.

 

[hoplitejoe]

I am sure METY will make a different story, and this time he might not cheat

 

[Tambien]

Not likely.

TDEBS

Tambien Duchy Emergency Broadcast System​

The Thanyou Empire is rumored to be mobilizing its troops along the border on continent Epica. So far, the Grand Daedwartian Union has supported the Duchy, and it may be possible to sign an Alliance. The Republic of Dumanios has declared neutrality, and ordered all citizens to its bunkers.

I shall second this act. All registered citizens of the Duchy will report to their assigned bunkers. All reserve, militia, and active military forces will report to Tambopolis for orders.

This may be my last adress for some time, citizens. Stay calm and stay safe. Hope for the best and plan for the worst.

May God bless us all.

~His Imperial Majesty, Duke-Emperor Horatio Tambun XVI

 

[trexeric]

The city state of Trexericia officially declares its neutrality. All residents are evacuated to the unclaimed regions of the Civilized Archipelago. Bunkers - though hopefully unnecessary - are quickly being dug.

 

[SamSniped]

The Republic of New England has honored its alliance with the Duchy of Tambien, and is officially at war with the ThanYou Empire. We urge all nations to rise up in arms against the ThanYou empire quickly.

(OOC: Should we move this to the OT forums? Or an even better idea- make it an IOT?)

 

[Tambien]

Uhh.... I had something similar along those lines in my mind... so I make this.

DRAW YOUR BORDERS, fellow nations of Stureesundtails! MAKE YOUR CLAIMS REASONABLE. Remember, the Duchy and Empire are supposed to be the two superpowers. If Lelouch drops in, he may have a large nation. (The Red is the Imperial Tambien Duchy, the yellow the Thanyou Empire) Please use different colors for your nation, and use the gray color for your borders. It can all be done using Paint. Thanks!

(I plan on gamin' this up, I just want to assure that its only S&Ters so as to assure continuity. Also, even if you make your nation, you dont have to actually play. Remember that!)

Spoiler :

***Any Central Archipelago Island not explicitly shown as another nation's territory is the property of Lelouch***

List of Declared Nations
-Thanyou Empire (Yellow)
-Imperial Tambien Duchy (Red)
-Republic of Dumanios (Light Brown)
-Grand Daedwartian Union (Light Blue)
-Republic of New England (Light Green)
-City State of Trexericia (Purple)
-Holy Christosian Dominion (Orange)
-Noerland (Dark Blue)
-Thalassocracy of Bairisiland (Dark Green)
-Southern Kingdom (Brownish Yellow)
-Tomorrow Foundation (Grey)
-United Southern Regions (Maroon)
-Lelouch Imperium (NPC) (Light Purple)
-Nation of N (Grey-blue)
-Confederation of Yoshiland (NPC) (Dark Purple) (Northern)
-Unified Nation of Ilduce (NPC) (Purple) (Middle)

Alliances
-Grand Alliance (Imperial Tambien Duchy, Grand Daedwartian Union, Republic of New England, Noerland)

Neutrals
-City State of Trexericia
-Republic of Dumanios
-Holy Christosian Dominion
-The Tomorrow Foundation
-The United Southern Regions

 

[Dumanios]

The Republic of Dumanios' claims to the Southern Continent are only remote research stations. We ready our forces just in case of an invasion.

 

[SamSniped]

I can't edit the map at the moment, so give me a decent chunk of the NW area.

 

[trexeric]

Expect my edited map tomorrow.

 

[Daedwartin]

The maroon lines are state boundarys, called Zones, with the one shaped like Delaware being the Capital Zone, Daedwartinnia. We are nomially a Federal Republic, aligned with the Imperial Tambien Duchy. In fact, We are a Totalitarian Autocratic Theocratic Military Monarchy( mix of junta and monarchy.) aligned with the Imperial Tambien Duchy

We are lead in military matters by the Commander In Chief. He is the greatest authority in executive and military matters. We have a well-trained medium-sized military. We buy most our air-force from the Imperial Tambien Duchy, but we maintain a respectable blue-water fleet. It would still require a miracle from the Lord to beat the Great Power Navies though. Perhaps the Lord's Favor will smile upon us? This position has always been held by the President External since Daedwartia I, second President External. it is Classified Information on how this position is chosen.

In Religion, we have The Archbishop of Tambeinism. He is the head of the Branch of Tambeinism in the Union. We universally hate followers of METYism. or any other religion for that matter. it is strange our religious purity. no one knows the reason behind it. all claim that the Lord Tambein must have surely blessed us with unity. This has caused our relations to be appalling. Valid clergy members for this position are bishops chosen by the Pope, of which 5 are selected. This gives the Imperial Tambien Duchy a role in our politics as they are the defenders of the faith, and the pope resides in the Imperial Tambien Duchy as well.

In Economic issues, the Treasurer is the highest authority. We have a prospering economy, thanks to trade with the Imperial Tambien Duchy. It is obvouisly much smaller though. still, we are clearly blessed. Is Chosen by vote of stock-owners. Which results in this being held by a member of the House of Daedwartin. Who own collectively by law 70% of the stocks...

Foreign affairs is decided by the High Diplomat. This tends to considered a rump job, as only 3 states have any relations with us, the Imperial Tambien Duchy, the City State of Trexericia, and the Republic of New England. Only the Duchy and the Republic view us in a manner greater than caution. This is due to religious fervor. Why should we care for false beliefs! chosen by all the diplomats. Has never been held by a member of the House of Daedwartin.

Policing of the state falls under State Sec. Classified Information is Classified Information because they Classified Information in order to Classified Information so Classified Information can Classified Information. Is Lead by Classified Information. Classified Information. Is chosen by President Eternal...Most Likely to lose job.
As you can clearly see, most Information about State Sec is CLASSIFIED.

The President Eternal is the executive (head. He is chosen by the above council members for life. [For all due purposes, the republic is a monarchy. the last 4 presidents were the son of the previous president. they realized the power of being able to choose the Classified Information of State Sec allowed them to never be impeached. so we have 2 kings and 3 queens in the past. Daedwartis III is the current.]

the Senate is in charge of passing approval over treaties and act of wars. also decides new laws. can impeach a president or council member except for ArchBishop if council gives unanimous approval. Said person being tried doesn't count in giving approval. That is, if it hadn't been disbanded. interestingly, it wasn't disbanded by the President Eternal. It had been disbanded for 20 years by the time this post was declared. This because a civil war had occurred. The first President eternal became so because the people wanted him to become this. he dryly remarked that this made no sense what so ever. They been pushing ever since to force the President Eternal to declare a Constitutional Absolute Monarchy.

Archbishop can only be impeached by the clergy.

Judaical is the same as the US of real life, but 9 supreme justices. the same laws are technically in place. except for the state of emergency we have been in since Daedwartis I became President, and declared by popular referendum. President Eternal. As a result, the judicial department is State Sec. Judge, Jury and Executioner all in one.

President
-Council
--Classified Information
--Treasurer
--High Diplomat
--Archbishop
--CnC
Senate-disbanded, but can be reformed. AS IF!

Accepts the offer to join the Grand Alliance. Declares Holy War on Thanyou Empire. FOR THE LORD TAMBEIN!

 

[Tambien]

Brand New Map!

Spoiler :

KEY
-Thanyou Empire (Yellow)
-Imperial Tambien Duchy (Red)
-Republic of Dumanios (Light Brown)
-Grand Daedwartian Union (Light Blue)
-Republic of New England (Light Green)

Also, I have named the various continents of the world, and the various areas of my land (will be expanded later). You have the right to name the bays in your land, and even bays that you share if they have not already been named. Feel free to name island groups that you own, etc.

Have fun with it!