Let’s hear your Joe Biden insults

[amadeus]

No, no, not insults against him.

Joe Biden has this folksy, almost antiquated way of doling out the dabs on people and I thought for a fun exercise we could all try our hands at it.

Have a go at it, you onion-peelin’ tree trimmers.

 

[Quintillus]

Huh, if I started trimming trees, that one would apply to me in the literal sense.

The one that has woven its way into my vocabulary is "C'mon, man." Understated, but gets the point across that someone's being ridiculous. Probably most famously applied to the former guy in the White House.

 

[Gori the Grey]

One part of the context for amadeus' thread is that Biden has used the phrase "lying dog-faced pony soldier" (but said in a joking tone) in talking to voters at campaign events. It's supposed to be a line in a John Wayne film, but nobody's been able to confirm that, and nobody can figure out what it's supposed to mean. So I'll get to work on a similarly absurd and baffling phrase with that same form and cadence.

Here you go:

You're a turtle-paced wick-trimmer.
You're a stoop-shouldered lice-inspector
You're a stingy, double-chinned salsa-dancer
You're a splay-toed gadget-smasher

 

[amadeus]

Those are some good burns, you shovel-pushin’ gelatin-molder.

 

[Farm Boy]

For an egg sucking chamberpot dribbler.

 

[Gori the Grey]

Oh that's pretty rich coming from a tea-stained smock-ruffler.

 

[amadeus]

This thread was about as good of an idea as a square wheel on a shopping cart. I guess I’m just an old, gimpy-lipped Monopoly cheater.

 

[Kaitzilla]

Roomba in Chief!

 

[Hygro]

This thread was about as good of an idea as a square wheel on a shopping cart. I guess I’m just an old, gimpy-lipped Monopoly cheater.

That’s what you get for being a blood sucking snot brained celebrity softball outfielder

 

[amadeus]

That’s a bit obscene for Biden. Folksy, I said, folksy! You can’t just throw out things like that you low-down, gas-guzzlin’ monkey-pincher.

 

[Hygro]

Just shut up, man

 

[Quintillus]

This thread was about as good of an idea as a square wheel on a shopping cart.

Have some faith in yourself man, that's a bunch of malarkey.

 

[GoodEnoughForMe]

Check this out:

Boe Jiden

 

[amadeus]

That’s no Biden insult you no-good tiddlywinkli’n‘ bootblack.

 

[Gori the Grey]

Yeah, the thread's filling up with slack-jawed aardvark-chasers. Get a clue, you biscuit-munching garden-trompers.

 

[Farm Boy]

You wouldn't know a clue if it fell on your head, you bow legged light bulb sniffer.

 

[Core Imposter]

"The pony soldier speaks with a tongue of the snake that rattles" and "dog-faced soldiers" are quotes that come from different movies. One thing that no one should question is Joe Biden's ability to steal someone else's words.

 

[Gori the Grey]

You wouldn't know a clue if it fell on your head, you bow legged light bulb sniffer.

Why, I'll give you a clue, you sack of mealy yams.

 

[Core Imposter]

Joe Biden is the kind of man that is always looking for his pecker in someone else's britches.

 

[Farm Boy]

lol!

Why, I'll give you a clue, you sack of mealy yams.

I'd like to see you try, you slobber sucking pumpkin pimper.