Questions...

[Xen]

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?


2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?


3. Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?


4. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?


5. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

 

[tonberry]

Who was the first person to look into an oyster and say: "Hum... look tasty."

 

[Smaasnekje]

1 Great Ugh
2 Great Ugh II
3 More of a money trap
4 Yes
5 ido'known

 

[Mescalhead]

Originally posted by Smaasnekje
2 Great Ugh II

No, it was Klugbgd II in 63,851 B.C.E.

 

[Eastern Knight]

here is the rest:

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a
horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

What do you call male ballerinas?

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he can't wait to stick his head out the window into the wind?

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

 

[Smaasnekje]

Originally posted by Eastern Knight
here is the rest:


Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

There is one in mine...

 

[Mescalhead]

Originally posted by Eastern Knight
here is the rest:

1. If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

2. If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

3. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

4. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

5. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

6. What do you call male ballerinas?

7. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

8. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? [/QUOTE

1. Its a song about the modern apathy toward the agriculture industry.

2. Then they wouldn't have a show. Which leads me to wonder how they kept a camera working on the island for 3 years, and subsequently broadcasted it, and still no one rescued them. The show couldn't have been that popular.

3. You don't?

4. It's just sexier.

5. At that time, the Jim Crow laws was still in effect. But the 'seperate, but equal' part was grossly unenforced. This was poetically reflected in the cartoons, since only white people could stand upright at the time.

6. Ballerinos.

7. Nadular

8. If more than 2 buttons are pushed on different floors for the same elevator, whoever pushes their's more times wins.

 

[Eastern Knight]

well, i didn't make these questions up

 

[Rik Meleet]

Originally posted by Xen
5. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

Alphabet soup is banned after researchers discovered that it contained BSE, HIV, DDT and STD.

 

[CivCube]

Bill Watterson asked the first question on that list.

 

[Superevie]

1. Who would spend $2.00 on water that is free?
2. Who was the first guy to say, "I'd like a steel rod through my tongue"?
3. Who looked at a piece of raw fish one day and said, "Why cook it? Could taste cool."

 

[SimChicken]

1. How can my feet smell if they don't have a nose?

2.Why is the sky blue?

3.What's a continent?

 

[polymath]

The sky is blue because 'blue light bends best'. All else follows. Simple refraction. Wait, that's not funny. Oh well.

 

[onejayhawk]

Originally posted by SimChicken
1. How can my feet smell if they don't have a nose?

2.Why is the sky blue?

3.What's a continent?

1. This is good, or your socks would smother you.

2. Its a newborn?

3. More importantly, is the opposite of continent, incontinent?

One of my own.

If "course" means around, and "inter" means through, where do babies come from?

J

 

[Mescalhead]

Originally posted by onejayhawk
If "course" means around, and "inter" means through, where do babies come from?

Look Here

 

[SuperBeaverInc.]

1. If a tree falls on a mime in the woods, does he make a sound?

2. If you can be disgruntled, how come you can't be gruntled?

3. If books get dog-eared, do dogs get book-eared?

4. Why is abbreviation such a long word?