Suleiman's Harem

[Flouzemaker]

Alright... this is what the Ottoman Empire currently looks like in 1912 AD, before I play the turn:

You can see, near Seoul, one of the other reasons I had betrayed Catherine: I won't have Oil until Plastics unless I take Seoul.
Furthermore, I don't even have any coal, which does frustrate me so. Can't indulge my railroads fetish...

Anyhow, I'm resuming play, so expect an update when I'm done!
Thanks for all the advice!

 

[BrianJ]

Sorry about the loss. I'm glad you are still continuing with the restart though.

Looks like you have oil offshore. Unfortunately it is not close to any cities..

Maybe you can move a city. .hehe

Good luck!

 

[axident]

You still have uranium for warships and could build that corp that give you oil. Mass artillery + Infantry can easily stop oil-based armies until Flight+Radio. Even after Flight, the AI doesn't usually have that many bombers to worry about. So I wouldn't necessarily go to war over something like that. I would if you didn't have any uranium OR oil though!

 

[Antilogic]

With the changes to air units in general, including the limit of 4 per city (until you build airports), it is not nearly as bad as it was before for the "flightless" Civ.

 

[InvisibleStalke]

A defensive pact with Catherine might solve both problems. It probably won't deter france from attacking given their monster army, but it would mean that she would take the brunt of the offense and possibly lose some cities which might kill her culture aims.

 

[Catharsis]

Two-Step Guide to TEH ULTIMATE VICTORY
1) Nuke everyone.
2) Make phallic nuke jokes at Boudica/Cathy/Hatty/Izzy.

(Great story BTW. )

 

[Flouzemaker]

You still have uranium for warships and could build that corp that give you oil. Mass artillery + Infantry can easily stop oil-based armies until Flight+Radio. Even after Flight, the AI doesn't usually have that many bombers to worry about. So I wouldn't necessarily go to war over something like that. I would if you didn't have any uranium OR oil though!

I do not have uranium either... it's not so readily apparent on the screenshot, but the uranium is in fact inside Suryavarman's cultural borders. Ever since I founded the city, I have never been the possessor of that tile near Bursa.

So basically, I'm a flightless, navy-less, tank-less Civ trying to survive.
I can't even build frikkin' spaceship parts!

Worse yet, it turns out that Cathy's 3 leading culture cities are Moscow, Seoul and P'yongyang.
That very much adversely affects my principal source of gold ans science: Ankara. In fact, it cripples it a little more with each passing turn.

If I somehow (possibly thanks to pacts with Boudica, Catherine and Suryavarman) turn the tables on De Gaulle and dogpile him... the Khmer become the Domination threat, for his army equals France's.
I've become the shadow of my former scientific self, letting Cyrus and Suryavarman take a tech lead while no one wants to trade with me.

I'd like to grab a French city that has oil nearby (or even coal would do), but at this point, and without a source of GA, I wouldn't even remotely own the coveted tile unless I razed every cultural threats in a fifteen tile radius (I may or may not exaggerate).


It has become quite clear to me that I'm not winning this one, lol!

 

[Antilogic]

At the very least, drop Free Religion and adopt a popular religion as your state religion. If you can't do that (because they have moved on from Free Religion as well), then diplomacy becomes so much tougher.

 

[Niklas]

Who cares if you win the game? All for the story, and IMO it would be quite a fitting end if Manny-boy gets spanked by his lady aquaintances in the end.

 

[Izipo]

Yes, it's gonna be very hard to win that game with just your 7 cities (and only 3 worth anything, really).
You were right in your first attempt, Seoul and Pyongyang are key cities IMO.
Would it be possible by any chance to bribe Charles in attacking Cathy and join the fray ? I doubt it, but can't see a way out of this.

Anyway, as Niklas said, it's the story that matters. Everyone loves a winner, but a funny loser is good nonetheless.

 

[Flouzemaker]

I should be able to update soon.
The game still isn't over, but thanks to all of your advice (not all was applicable - or I had to make some choices), I've transformed a completely hopeless game into... um... a mostly hopeless game.
Still, it's an improvement!

 

[Flouzemaker]

1912 AD:

Moo-hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Ha! Ha! Ha!

What's up with the evil laughter? Seems quite out of character!

Ah! You must finally, know. For the last fifty years, I've been hoarding two big stacks of Artillery and SAM Infantries. I'm about to declare war on Cathy and take both Seoul and P'yonyang like they were only defended by Warriors!

Yess! I married a REAL man!

You betcha, babe!

Wait! Don't do it! I have a bad feeling about this...

What bad feeling?

First, Catherine won't be pleased... but you expected that one. Second, Boudica and Suryavarman will be quite disappointed that you declared war on their friend. Then... my feminine intuition is waving all kinds of red flags when it comes to De Gaulle. He's been quiet, lately, and we all know he's been amassing ginormous quantities of troops!

So what are you saying?

I'm saying that if you betray Catherine now... They're all going to dogpile us into oblivion.

And you base your far fetched theories on what?

Female intuition.

Who am I to argue with that?

Instead, bolster Wonsan's defenses as much as you possibly can, and sign as many defense pacts as possible while switching back to Buddhism.

Oh, all right. Spoilsport.

Suleiman dials the VP...

OUCH! What just hit me in the back?

No, it's not a knife, it's a defense pack.

Ooh! How lovely! You have a bad feeling about De Gaulle, too?

No, but my wives do.

Trust them as you would me. We shall be stronger than ever with our defense pacts! See ya later!

 

[Flouzemaker]

Suleiman redials the VP...

Hallo?

Hey there, my favorite fugly friend! Our current resource trades don't work for me anymore, so I'm canceling them all.

BUT, I can give you gold for some of your Dye... Cathy stole mine with her culture.

Ah! OK, then. It is agreed.

Laterz!



1913 AD:

Enough time has passed, we're now allowed to revolt back to Theocracy.

Let's do it, Ottomans got to do what Ottomans got to do!


1914 AD:

Suleiman makes a call...

Yes?

My bountiful Queen Boubica! How would you enjoy the perks and privileges of a Defensive Pact today?

You mean with you?

Yup.

Looks like something is on your mind...

Two things, to be precise.

Two? Better get that pact signed, then!

That's the ticket! Thanks, Boudica!


Suleiman intends to make another call...

Don't even bother. My sources tell me Suryavarman is not interested at all in signing a Defensive Pact. Something about being superior to everyone else...

Dang it!

But I'm sure he'd be easy to bribe into war, however. Looks like we'll have to settle for that...

 

[Flouzemaker]

1917 AD:

Isabella completed Broadway, Manny-bunny. If we thought Spanish was invading main-stream culture, we ain't seen nothing yet!

Hm. That's fun and all, but we've got bigger fish to fry, here!

And De Gaulle founded Mining Inc. in Thebes.

Did he? I'll keep that in mind!



1919 AD:

Hatshepsut and I declare war on you, you silly, silly little man!

I am not LITTLE!

Touché. Very well. I declare war on you, you silly, silly morbidly obese man!

You're a [BLEEP]ing idiot, Chuck! Did you even bother to check if I had signed any defensive pacts, huh? Did you?

No...

What kind of moron declares war on someone without checking for possible defensive pacts first, huh? What kind of moron?

The kind of leader whose army is so bloody huge that he could literally face the rest of the world and still win!

Is that what you think?

It's not just what I think, it's what I know to be true!

Catherine, Boudica and Churchill just declared war on you. Have fun trying to prove yourself right, [BLEEP]er!

 

[Flouzemaker]

De Gaulle as a [BLEEP]-load of minions on the way.

Wonsan is defended. I'm pretty sure I can take them.

But it looks like they're changing their plans. They were heading for Wonsan, but now, they're veering towards Catherine's Namp'o.

Shall we bride Suryavarman into joining our cause?

Not yet, I want to wait until his bank account isn't flippin' empty.

I'm not sure how long Catherine can defend her city, though. Her troops have become slightly dated since she started focusing on Culture...



1920 AD:

As expected, Namp'o is under siege... and by De Gaulle's sheer numbers, I don't think Catherine stands much of a chance.

Still, it buys us some extra time.



1921 AD:

We didn't get much extra time, it seems. Namp'o has fallen to the French.

It was all part of my great plan, babe.

No it wasn't.

Well, I can make it fit into my great plan.

 

[Flouzemaker]

1923 AD:

Yay! The Great Engineer, George Washington Geothals has been born in Edirne!

Hm. We won't be in a position to build a wonder anytime soon... Make him sleep for now... he'll help in giving some conquered cities some extra culture. Even though it's overkill to build a Cathedral with a Great Engineer...


1927 AD:

Well, is De Gaulle coming, or what?

What, my dearest Sultan. He does send a few troops now and again, but we easily destroy them. No sign of an organized attack yet. But his greatly superior Destroyers make short work of out Ship of the Lines and he's easily pillaging our coastal resources.

Hmm... That's when the extra resources I couldn't seem to be able to trade before come in...

Suleiman dials...

Yes?

Winston, you've got Fish, and you've got Crabs. I want me some. Would you like some Corn and some Sugar in return?

Absolutely!

It is settled, then. See you later!

Suleiman makes another call...

Hello?

What do you want to declare war on De Gaulle and Hatty?

I can give you my World Map, 300 gold and become your war ally for only the knowledge of Artillery.

~sigh~ Deal. The 300 gold will allow me to upgrade a few more troops. Welcome to the First World War, buddy!

Oh, and before I forget... De Gaulle has founded Creative Constructions somewhere in his Empire. But I don't think anyone care about that at the present time...

 

[Flouzemaker]

1929 AD:

Wow. A real world war. I haven't seen that in Civ in forever! How the front around Wonsan?

Catherine is sure being a trooper! She's throwing everything she's got at the French. She doesn't really win anything, but it sure makes our job of defending Wonsan exceptionally easy.

Excellent. Let me make a little call...

Suleiman dials the VP...

Doop, dee-doop dee doo...

Hello? I'm kind of -

HIGN!

ACK!

BACKSTABBED!! Hah! Hah! Oh, that's precious! You SO didn't see it coming! And all your defense pacts have been canceled, too!

How could you DO this to me?

Your [BLEEP]ing culture cripples my beautiful Empire, Cathy. I has to be done.

You're a [BLEEP]ing lowlife!

Why? Because De Gaulle has already offed most of your troops for me, and your focus on Culture has prevented you from modernizing your defenses? Oh, boo-hoo!

~cries~ But we were friends!

Oh, don't act like you wouldn't do it too, Cathy!

~sobs~ It's not fair! I was gonna win!

And now, you're not. You backstab more than you sleep around, Cathy. Now, have a taste of your own medicine, for once!

It looks like liberating Seoul will be extraordinarily easy, my dear Sultan.

That's the plan. We now have enough troops to both defend Wonsan and conquer Russia. So we'll do both! But first, I want me the Mahadbodi! So, attack!!

 

[dazman92]

war! what is it good for?

a really good story, apparently.

 

[Flouzemaker]

The Ottoman Empire reduces Seoul's defenses to 0%, then proceeds with the attack...

Booyah! Too. Easy.

Once it's done it's useless revolting, Seoul's Mahabodhi will provide us with 52 commerce per turn! Yay!

I love speedy conquests! We get to keep almost all of the buildings in a city that way! Awesome. Just AWESOME! Let's move on towards P'yongyang!


1932 AD:

Still no sign of a "real" French attack?

None.

And we're ready to liberate P'yongyang?

Affirmative!

Well, then, let's DO IT!

Once again, too easy. Man, I love the power of gigantic stacks of Artillery... so long as they're not used against me.



1934 AD:

Uh-Oh! De Gaulle is approaching Wonsan...

That stack doesn't seem so bad. I think we can safely press "return" and await the attack.

Moments later...

Things definitely went our way, my dear Sultan. Though we did lose one SAM Infantry, De Gaulle lost five Cannon and ten Infantries in a grand defeat!

Bwah! Hah! Hah!

 

[RockTheCazbah87]

YES!

I knew Suleiman would triumph in the end!


Ok, the games not won yet. But you beat the French!