Yes.
Suleiman is a Cheating Scumbag.
Why?
Well, we'll have to jump to another story telling format to get the picture.
We're now in 1912.
I give Catherine a call, and, while her back is turned, the way it is every single time you begin talks with her, I stab a knife straight into her back and declare war.
If you browse through the more recent screenshots, the farther along the war with De Gaulle goes, Russia's culture become more and more invasive.
In a strategic move you don't see Catherine pull out very often, the wily little seductress is heading straight for a Cultural Victory. Moscow and Novgorod are churning out huge amounts of Culture. While her 3rd city isn't that culturally strong, it's still good enough to hope for a very late game Cultural victory.
Of course, I'm not allowed to win that way. So, I come to the conclusion that I can't fight culture against culture... I have to eliminate her. Or, at least, take Moscow, Novgorod, Seoul and possibly raze Pyongyang.
With that in mind, I'd been hoarding huge stacks of Artillery ever since I got the tech, then proceeded to make more stacks of SAM Batteries, the best "offensive" unit available at that time. With two +10% Strength each, they'd do the job, anyways. Cathy was still in love with her Cossacks.
But, evidently, I'm stupid.
You likely have noticed that a long time ago already.
I declare war, then quickly notice that Catherine had a defensive pact with Boudica, and I had simply been too moronic to even check.
So now, I'm at war with my two loveliest neighbors... and Churchill. Though, we can all agree, he doesn't matter.
"I can take 'em," I say, "it'll just make a better story."
As planned, I take both Seoul and Pyongyang in 1913. The latter, I raze. It has always annoyed me since the beginning. Then, I fortify in Seoul and Ankara, and patiently wait for Catherine to kill off all of the Cossacks in futile attacks (and she pretty much indulges me).
Meanwhile, Boudica sends a huge stack of mostly outdated units towards Edirne. The latter city produces a unit per turn, and thus, I easily destroy her stack with a few sacrificial Artillery, some SAM Batteries and brand spankin' new Infantries, now finally available.
However, in 1917, De Gaulle and Hatshepsut declare war on me again... and I'm already busy on two fronts. I easily handle the first wave of attack, and start to grow confident.
"OMG" I scream in glee, "this is gonna be awesome, epic storytelling!"
Then, I manage to negociate peace with Boudica, and she gives me well over 500 gold for it. I use that cash to upgrade as many units as I can.
Hatshepsut makes a simply pathetic attempt to reclaim Elephantine, which is most easily thwarted.
Then, Cyrus declares war on me.
"Pfft!" I figure, "Cyrus is a lamb," He'll not do any damage!
Still. As a precaution, I negociate peace with Catherine. I don't get that much money out of the deal since her coffers are pretty empty.
And when I see De Gaulle's stack arrive, I'm suddenly overjoyed at my decision. It's a monster. I'm pretty sure he could have occupied every single land tile in the world with one infantry each. Even more alarming is the preposterously large stack of Trebuchets. (While I beelined to Artillery and Rocketry, De Gaulle invested everything he had to get Infantry, obviously).
He attacks Wonsan. In the same turn, he has enough Trebuchets to get the defenses back to 0% and causes enough collateral damage that he doesn't lose a single Infantry unit in the taking of Wonsan, even though it was well garrisoned. He then moves towards Pusan, capturing it just as easily a few turns later.
Meanwhile, Cyrus' gigantic Stack arrives next to Seoul and he easily takes it. He also makes an attempt at capturing Elephantine, but fails for lack of troops since he had obviously sent everything he had to Seoul.
Then, Suryavarman and his Vassal, Isabella, declare war on me. The fact that we no longer shared a religion no doubt helped.
I had been stubborn so far, but I finally stop building the Apollo Program in Istanbul to churn out extra military. (Yeah... I know... don't say it)
De Gaulle takes Pusan, Catherine declares war and takes Ankara, and Boudica (with Churchill) does the same, severely damaging Istanbul's garrison. That makes it quite easy for Suryavarman to grab my Capital. Meanwhile, De Gaulle's never ending stack of Infantrymen is besieging Edirne.
The [illegitimate offsprings] are dogpiling me into oblivion.
At this point, I indulge in constructive activities like;
- hurling empty soda cans at the walls;
- screaming various insults in French, English, and Gibberish at the screen;
- waking up my downstairs neighbor by jumping up and down in futile fits of rage;
- and furiously deleting save files and screenshots while grumbling things like "[Physical act of reproduction] this [bodily waste]!"
Now, since those tragic events, a day or two have passed. My composure finally regained, I come to the conclusion that, really, I should finish the game... you know... for the enjoyment of readers.
I begin to search for whatever I could recuperate. The Saves are gone, and so are the screen shots from 1912 and later. Which is too bad since I worked hard on all sorts of pictures, detailing precisely my evil plans of conquest.
However, in my search, I notice that the date of the last Gilgamesh game is wrong; decidedly too recent. I open it... it's the Suleiman game, in 1912, right before I declare war on Catherine.
So... well.
Though we can all agree I have in fact lost this game, I can at least finish the story with another file... and possibly a different ending.
Though probably not. I had been creating units non-stop (save for the AProg. in Istanbul), yet, if De Gaulle attacks, and I expect he will still do that in 1917 approximatively, I don't stand a chance. That was an absolutely inhuman quantity of units he had...
But anyways... this time, no matter what happens, I will not quit the game and destroy my work in righteous anger.
I will not declare war on Catherine, but will instead attempt to fight culture with culture - all without winning culturally.
I will also try to convert back to Buddhism asap so Catherine, Boudica and Suryavarman will instead agree to defense pacts with me.
Then, and only then, do we stand a chance of winning against Charles de Gaulle.
While, usually I'm much, much further ahead in the game than what I describe in my posts... this time, for the first time, I'm in 1912 - this story thread is now in 1912, and I have not played yet.
So, for once, you could give advice and opinions, and I'll actually, concretely, be able to use your counsel in the game.
Don't really have any screens to help ya, though.
In any case...
... Suleiman's Harem: Alternate Ending will continue... as soon as it is played!
Some rather bad news... De Gaulle has come back with another large stack of attackers:
Dang it! How many troops does the dude have? Alright. Let's cross our fingers and hope for the best... 
YAY! Michel de Ruyter has been born in Istanbul! 
It's almost sad you deleted all the screenshots and stuff--even a loss may have been entertaining, if written well.
