Worst Movie of all time?

[YNCS]

Originally posted by CurtSibling
...spending £5 in the cinema.

I rent them for $3.50 each.

 

[Grille]

My rants are worth 0.02$ each.

 

[hbdragon88]

$3.50? At my local video store, it's just a $1 for old releases and only $1.50 for new ones.

 

[Quokka]

Originally posted by Quokka
Another one I wished I had missed is Signs. Utter crap.

Originally posted by puglover


WHAT!?!?!?

The preview showed the whole movie, it told you everything you needed to know. The only thing that it didn't show was the actual aliens.
As for spooky, don't you mean terminally slow? There was no build up in tension at all, neither was there any mystery. 'Reach back and swing away' What a laughable conclusion that was.
Then finally the aliens themselves. They cross the galaxy and are more advanced than us, but still walk around naked on the earth where 70% of the surface is lethal to them and they are susceptible to digit removal from kitchen knives, the earths greatest weapon. They also manage to carry no personal weaponry, even though they are on a mission of conquest and can thus be defeated by a Louisville Slugger and glass of water.

 

[ETO_Peregrine]

The movie that most recently traumatized me was Dreamcatcher. I would have expected Steven King to commit seppuku on live TV to make it up to us for this one. This "thriller" manages to be both sad as a horror movie and worthless as science fiction. The basis of much of the movie is a so-called scaling error: a hippo-sized alien manages to crawl inside a 150lb man. "One worm destroys the world" is right. This whole film seems to be an ad for colon health.

The Patriot was mediocre, but I really don't see how it could be the worst film of all time. And it wasn't nearly as violent as the actual Revolution.

My personal 'F' list:
-Lethal Tender: "Film Canada" at its very worst. Includes lots of sparking bullets!
-APEX: Co-starring Carry Fisher.
-Samuel L. Jackson as Shaft: More sparking bullets than you can shake a stick at-and precious little else.
-Beastmaster: From the "so bad it's almost good" category.
-Arena: Same as above.
-The Forrest Warrior: Chuck Norris as a bear.
-Starship Troopers: Got the joke. Hated it anyway.
-Matt Walberg in Planet of the Apes: So, how did the horses wind up there, again?
-Iron Eagle: Teens vs. Migs.
-Star Trek: The Motion Picture: aka Star Trek: The Blue Movie, Star Trek: Bald is Sexy, Star Trek: Hubris in a Saucer, or Star Trek: Hey, Isn't that the Dad from Seventh Heaven?

At the risk of inspiring someone to see these acursed patterns of magnetic filings on tape, I must mention the 80s anime films M.D. Geist and M.D. Geist: DEATH FORCE. To quote a character from the series the animation is, uh, "how incredibly gross! Aaaaghbleghglugblat!"

 

[CurtSibling]

Originally posted by YNCS

I rent them for $3.50 each.

That is still £3.49 too much for some movies...

 

[thestonesfan]

Curt - It's not really about taste. If it were, the thread would be titled "The movie you disliked the mostest" or something. But I can see where a set of standards would be hard to come up with, so it's probably best to boil it down to personal preference.

Quokka - It's so easy to pick apart the stupidities of "Signs" that it gets redundant. I mean, if they'd have just bought a freakin' gun their problems would have been solved. The part I hated most was that they let the dogs die. I don't think dogs or kids should ever die in movies. But I can't say that I didn't enjoy the movie the first time I saw it.

Those movies they do on MST3K are usually far worse than anything that a major studio produces. Watch "Manos: Hands of Fate" without them making fun of it and you'll se a really, really bad movie. So bad it's good and then bad again.

 

[CivCube]

What certainly deserves mention are all the children's "movies" that are whipped out in a week directly to video. The horror...the horror....

 

[Zcylen]

and I complined because $2.00 was too expensive,
I think Im in heaven.

movies are pretty cheap here

 

[Quokka]

The part I hated most was that they let the dogs die. I don't think dogs or kids should ever die in movies.

Why?

Are you a happy ending fan then?(another thread)

 

[Zcylen]

agree, signs wasnt as good as I thought.
I spected more from Melithon and the movie director but both failed to make a good movie.

 

[Gastric ReFlux]

The Fast and the Furious

 

[thestonesfan]

Originally posted by Quokka


Why?

Are you a happy ending fan then?(another thread)

I just hate seeing dogs and kids die in movies. I think it shows poor taste. Of course exceptions can be made, but I would avoid it if I were making a movie.

 

[napoleon526]

-Matt Walberg in Planet of the Apes: So, how did the horses wind up there, again?

CHRIST ALMIGHTY WAS THIS MOVIE BAD! At the end everybody just laughed and laughed. Tim Burton doesn't seem to realize that if you travel into the future, it doesn't change things in the past.

Also disturbing was the ape sexual innuendo. I was praying to God that Walberg and the ape woman would refrain from getting it on. And why does MW decide to go back to Earth? Everybody on the planet thinks he's great and Estella Warren wants to hump him! Sounds good to me!

If I ever see Tim Burton walking down the street, i'm going to go up to him and demand my $8 back, then kick him in the balls.

 

[Zcylen]

Originally posted by napoleon526


then kick him in the balls.

I wish we had that smilie

 

[Shaka Naldur]

there is one spanish gore movie that is by far the worst I've ever seen
I'll look for the name and i will post it

 

[CivCube]

I don't know if it's the worst, but Being John Malkovich is pretty tasteless.