Add Gender Options in the sidebar

[dutchfire]

Ah, I remember there was some stuff about Aelf, but I couldn't remember exactly what it was. I guess I've been Onioned

 

[peter grimes]

I don't see the harm in offering registered members the option of checking a box to indicate gender.

But as others have pointed out, there is wide latitude for posting info in your signature or custom title (once your post count unlocks that feature)

 

[Valka D'Ur]

^That's true, but some people prefer to use those spaces for other things.

 

[Tasunke]

the she-poster has spoken!! (just pretend there was a quote from Valka-D'Ur up above)




-Tasunke, he-poster




--> As for my own 2 cents, I feel that there should be a pie-chart demographic at the home page so we can check the male:female:it ratios at all times.


Actually, have all female posters make their Avatar Pic the hooters logo (or similar) every other full moon ^_^

 

[Lemon Merchant]

the she-poster has spoken!! (just pretend there was a quote from Valka-D'Ur up above)




-Tasunke, he-poster




--> As for my own 2 cents, I feel that there should be a pie-chart demographic at the home page so we can check the male:female:it ratios at all times.


Actually, have all female posters make their Avatar Pic the hooters logo (or similar) every other full moon ^_^

Good thread, but posts like this are a good reason not to have the feature, but I support the feature anyway. I have to correct far too many people even though I'm "in your face" about what I am. No one bothers me for being female, and I hope that more female members will identify when Ainwood implements the system. There's nothing to fear here. The site is well moderated and most complaints are handled swiftly. There is no reason for a woman gamer to fear the main forums. OT, on the otherhand...

 

[Valka D'Ur]

Good thread, but posts like this are a good reason not to have the feature, but I support the feature anyway. I have to correct far too many people even though I'm "in your face" about what I am. No one bothers me for being female, and I hope that more female members will identify when Ainwood implements the system. There's nothing to fear here. The site is well moderated and most complaints are handled swiftly. There is no reason for a woman gamer to fear the main forums. OT, on the otherhand...

OT is a more civil place in that respect now than it was a few years ago. Some of the worst offenders have either been permabanned or left on their own. And I think the female regulars have made it pretty plain by now that we are female and no arguments about that need be offered.

Of course there could be OT regulars who are female and have never said so.

 

[Loppan Torkel]

Link to video.


Thinking of Life of Brian.. Maybe it's the males who need to come out. Maybe OT mostly is made up of young, angry women. So many assumptions..

 

[Tasunke]

Good thread, but posts like this are a good reason not to have the feature, but I support the feature anyway. I have to correct far too many people even though I'm "in your face" about what I am. No one bothers me for being female, and I hope that more female members will identify when Ainwood implements the system. There's nothing to fear here. The site is well moderated and most complaints are handled swiftly. There is no reason for a woman gamer to fear the main forums. OT, on the otherhand...

Hey now, I said she-poster not she-wolf ... Sheesh

 

[Valka D'Ur]

How about not using "she-" anything, 'k? That kind of language should have been dead and buried with Edgar Rice Burroughs.

 

[Gori the Grey]

Oh, you she-humans get upset about such small matters! It's just a prefix, for goodness sake.

Moderator Action: In context, this is trolling. Keep it respectful, please.

 

[Viregel]

How about we just refer to everyone as "it"? Solves the problem.

If some people oppose to that, "S/he" or "they" could be used. In some older form of English, "he" was used to refer to anyone, so that could be valid if anyone here is fluent in Old/Middle English.

 

[Kyriakos]

What about the possible transgender, hermaphroditic, or Alien population of CFC members?

 

[ainwood]

The entire thing is optional. Unspecified is prempting wishes to cater for transgender etc, not the default if people don't want to specify male or female.

As noted previously.

 

[Angst]

I always like to make more personalization of my user page.

 

[dusters]

I think the option should be voluntary.

However, as a female poster myself, i have a tendency to always read what the other females on the forum write.

I'm very happy that Valka, Lemon Merchant, aimee, lucyduke (there must be more) are here, because to some extent i believe that females might have a different outlook on various topics and it's important to hear their opinion.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

I think the option should be voluntary.

However, as a female poster myself, i have a tendency to always read what the other females on the forum write.

I'm very happy that Valka, Lemon Merchant, aimee, lucyduke (there must be more) are here, because to some extent i believe that females might have a different outlook on various topics and it's important to hear their opinion.

That's nice to know. But you rarely say anything, yourself. Why not join the conversations?

 

[dusters]

I try to be honest with myself. I speak only about the things i have good knowledge of - diets (nutritional science), martial arts, meditation, yoga, Bridge (card game), chess.

I have degrees in pedagogy, philosophy and literature theory. My favourite topic is kids and alternative schools.

These aren't daily topics in OT or other forums, however i had my own "ask a diet specialist" thread in OT once.

I read OT daily, but I don't have much to add since a lot of topics have this "right/wrong" quality.

I don't want to prove anyone wrong or right. I'm not here to defend my beliefs with arguments. I'm interested in the ways people think and percieve the world. And that doesn't have the wrong/right quality. So I'm a bit sad with this Western discussion style as whole.

In my linguistics classes we were presented with information that in USA and Europe discussion is like a fight - there are winners and losers. Some people hold beliefs which doesn't fit into norm, because they aren't based on some kind of science.

In East, discussion is like dancing. One person gives an idea, other gives an idea related to the first. It's like building a house together. Two people engage in a conversation to exchange possible ways of thinking and approaching real problems from different perspectives. Of course, modern Asia has adopted Western way of discusssing nowadays, but distinction still exists.

 

[householder]

In my linguistics classes we were presented with information that in USA and Europe discussion is like a fight - there are winners and losers. Some people hold beliefs which doesn't fit into norm, because they aren't based on some kind of science.

Dusters, what you describe has often been criticized by Western feminists (at least during the second wave of feminism.) The claim was that this is a male style of discussion, and that a collaborative discussion which doesn't push for a resolution is more female in its approach.

But I guess this isn't necessarily so, at least in cultures which are less dominated by a Western style of interaction. After reading your comment, I recall news about American government officials expressing frustration that various Asian politicians (particularly Arab) discuss a topic for interminable lengths, without coming to a conclusion. Could this be similar to your point? Would the question be worth discussing in OT?

 

[dusters]

yea, i have seen feminism lay its paws upon discussion style.

However, my approach(dumbing it down) is simple - manly type of discussion seeks solutions. It seeks actions, possible ways how to fix things. Every situation which is talked about is a problem. It (supposedly) holds a question in it and therefore there should be/ought to be an answer to it.

Feminine type of discussion is talking about feelings. That made me feel angry, that interested me, that annoys me etc. The point of such discussion is to talk out your feelings and understand what makes you feel that way and why. And how you can change the situation to make you feel better about it.

It's a very complicated discussion, because more often than not, feelings overlap a lot. You may get an e-mail and it would make you feel happy, nostalgic, irritated and curious at the same time.

The end goal of feminine type of discussion is to understand the reasons for all emotions that arise from a simple fact of a problem or topic. Each emotion is there for a reason. To truly understand the network of all this, one may need psychoanalyst or a psychologist, so for mere people, it takes looong time to come to any conclusions.

There is a catch. By communicating with same people very often, you slowly begin to understand the way they feel and think, and you can come to conclusions much, much faster.

But... to understand other people, you need empathy. So generally i can say that in OT, many posters lack empathy towards each other. Instead of criticising and proving they could focus on improving their imagination.

For example - Person B holds a very different opinion compared to me. Why? Does he live in the same country as me? What are his possible life experiences? Income? Eduaction? It's not about actually whole OT getting to know each other, but having more empathy towards a person who might come from a much different background.

Tl:dr

Manly discussion is about problems. Problems are impersonal. the focus is on action

Feminine discussion is about feelings, problems are the cause for someone's feelings. The focus is on understanding your feelings, how you can either change your outlook on a problem to avoid bad feelings or how you can change the problematic situation to improve your feelings.


I don't think this is worth a topic in OT. People think in a way they are accustomed to, they aren't going to change that. They find their solutions in their discussion, they find some scientifical proof for their arguments and they get satisfaction winning a debate. Competition stems from survival instinct, competition endorses progress.

 

[Valka D'Ur]

I try to be honest with myself. I speak only about the things i have good knowledge of - diets (nutritional science), martial arts, meditation, yoga, Bridge (card game), chess.

I have degrees in pedagogy, philosophy and literature theory. My favourite topic is kids and alternative schools.

These aren't daily topics in OT or other forums, however i had my own "ask a diet specialist" thread in OT once.

I read OT daily, but I don't have much to add since a lot of topics have this "right/wrong" quality.

I don't want to prove anyone wrong or right. I'm not here to defend my beliefs with arguments. I'm interested in the ways people think and percieve the world. And that doesn't have the wrong/right quality. So I'm a bit sad with this Western discussion style as whole.

In my linguistics classes we were presented with information that in USA and Europe discussion is like a fight - there are winners and losers. Some people hold beliefs which doesn't fit into norm, because they aren't based on some kind of science.

In East, discussion is like dancing. One person gives an idea, other gives an idea related to the first. It's like building a house together. Two people engage in a conversation to exchange possible ways of thinking and approaching real problems from different perspectives. Of course, modern Asia has adopted Western way of discusssing nowadays, but distinction still exists.

The thing is, though, OT is full of discussions that go on (and have gone on) for a long time. Plotinus' "Ask a Theologian" thread is now in its fifth incarnation (assuming each one has 1000 posts, that's a lot of discussion!).

Yes, there are some posters who will have link wars to "prove" to the other person that he's "wrong." Not everyone goes for this style of posting, though.

It's funny about the "men look for a solution" style of posting. I've seen "Dear Abby" threads there where one of the guys has some sort of girlfriend problem. So I offer advice on what they should do about their problem. The result? My post either gets ignored, I'm told I don't know what I'm talking about, and they continue on fussing about something that's actually not that hard to fix (or at least would be easier to resolve if they'd try something other than what they've been doing).

I don't think this is worth a topic in OT. People think in a way they are accustomed to, they aren't going to change that. They find their solutions in their discussion, they find some scientifical proof for their arguments and they get satisfaction winning a debate. Competition stems from survival instinct, competition endorses progress.

I think it would be an interesting topic to try. Dusters, I request that you reconsider. This could be something that would get some folks here thinking about how they interact.