Black Comedy: The Fourth World Order

[REDACTED] or [DATA EXPUNGED]?


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Popping in very quickly to say that using the real life head of various organizations and companies in 1992 is not required. For example, in this universe, there is no "Apple Computer Company", just the Peach Computer Company, and therefore has its own fictional head. Likewise, if General Motors somehow figures into your grand scheme, you don't have to make Robert Stempel the CEO.

With that said, i do grab names out of the hat, hence why the President and his VP are George Bush and Quayle, whereas organizations I generate from here on out will have a combination of real and fictional characters.
 
OOC: Here is an example of how organizations and persons are organized on my personal sheet. There will not be a public one, because even if I remove sensitive information, the arrangement would be enough to give away secrets.

With that said, draw.io is a very useful too if you want to organize your own theories.

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21 hours until sign-up lock (so I can finish up the first update).
 
Sign-ups locked! Expect the first update tomorrow probably.

 
[START]

ALIEN UFO CRASHES IN ARABIAN DESERT; DESERT STORM II IMMINENT?
[Written by Ami Willard for Weekly Weird News]
I have it on good faith that the crashed American F-15 isn’t an F-15 at all, but an alien aircraft from beyond the stars! As my readers are well aware by now, the Earth has been a focal point in an interdimensional war between the Reptilians and Greys for tens of thousands of years now. This aircraft, no doubt, is one of theirs.

How does such an advanced aircraft just crash, you ask? It isn’t the first time our unfriendly galactic neighbors have crashed onto our happy little planet. Roswell, Pennsylvania, and the list goes on. Only time will tell what the American-Saudi-Reptilians Axis is cooking up on the Arabian peninsula, but this writer is putting all his money on a superweapon to wipe out Saddam’s army once and for all without the need for nuclear weapons.

ASEM & WHITE TECHNOLOGIES REPORTS LOWER-THAN-EXPECTED EARNINGS. [Written by Staff for Bloomberg]. Like most tech companies, Asem & White are struggling to recover from last year’s recession. This has soured some of those who believed that Asem & White would choose 1992 as the year to go public.

CCA TO OPEN FIRST PRIVATELY-RUN MAXSEC FEDERAL PRISON. [Written by Staff for the New York Sun]. The Corrections Corporation of America, under contract with the United States Marshals Service, will open Leavenworth Detention Center this May, raising fresh concerns over the growing “prison-industrial complex”. Human rights group claim that private prisons, especially those ran by the CCA, are prone to abuse on part of the guards. The CCA released a press release, saying they take human rights “very seriously” and will do all it can to train its guards at this new prison facility.

FORD WEATHERS STORM. [Written by Staff at Bloomberg]. The Ford Motor Company stunned the market by reporting a $3 billion loss, far less than what the market expected and a sign that the company is making a turnaround after last year’s recession.

INTEL AND AMD AT WAR FOR THE SOUL OF THE MARKET. [Written by Jerold Towner for Bloomberg]. This year, Intel will bring to market over twenty new cutting-edge chips, unveil its next-generation chip, and ultimately double the release of new chip families. All of this goes to the heart of a microprocessor war between Intel and Advanced Micro Devices Inc. and her fellow copycats. Intel has been dealt more than a few blows over the last year between the recession and news that competitors are copying and improving on Intel’s patented designs (court cases pending).

Only time will tell how Intel weathers the storm, but things are looking up for the company, which expects to have a 100 million-transistor chip out by 1998/1999.

OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE. [From the Velvet Charitable Foundation].
The VCF is proud to announce its latest initiative: YoungMinds. YoungMinds is a program to help disaffected and homeless teenagers in America’s largest cities and, someday, all her cities. YoungMinds will provide shelter and food to homeless youth as well as provide a nurturing environment to aid in youth development.

Secondly, we are proud to announce that the Velvet Charitable Foundation will expand operations in sub-Saharan Africa over the next few years. We feel that this region is in the most desperate need for our limited resources and expertise. More information will be revealed in coming months.

SUSPECTED SERIAL KILLER APPREHENDED. [Written by Staff at the New York Times]. It began as a normal night for one police officer before he saw a screaming, bleeding prostitute running up the street toward his parked cruiser. The officer, believing he was dealing with a violent John, soon descended into a world of bloody madness. Joel Rifkin, confronted by the officer as he rounded the corner (presumably chasing after his would-be victim), immediately surrendered.

The story he would deliver to interrogators over the next two hours left all in attendance stunned.

VLAKPLAAS’S HAVRIX LIKELY TO BEGIN USE IN 1992. [Written by Staff at the Daily Mail]. Vlakplaas, a pharmaceutical company, has secured a significant milestone as it will be the first company to bring a vaccine for hepatitis A vaccine to market. Last summer, European regulators approved Havrix for use.
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Orders cover 1 January 1992 to 9 July 1992.

Wait for your PMs before doing anything.

Next Update: 25 December, Noon Eastern
 
Last edited:
OOC: Great update Sonereal! Is there any format you'd prefer our orders to be in or...?
 
OOC
Oh my god, this is amazing. I'll see to it that I'll probably join at some point. Currently working on a few things though so it probably won't be today. I'll probably be apocalyptic again and make my conspiracy about a mix of Yahweh and Cthulhu running things from the depths of the Atlantic.
 
OOC: Would be happy to have you along for the ride. If you do get a sign-up approved by the orders lock, you are free to send in orders as well.
 
To answer both people, as well as a few others who never even asked, this thread can only be seen by the Illuminated. Your average Joe and politician can't see this thread IC.
 
Lets celebrate Christmas right by locking this 20 minutes early.

Locking 20 minutes early.
 
Update on the update. I have carpal tunnel or something because the left side of my right hand has been in a bit of pain lately, making typing out the PMs and update a bit of an adventure in masochism. So, earliest I can get the update out is Wednesday. Sorry about the wait.
 
Excerpts from the Various Newspapers
…terrorist attack on King Khalid Military City has become the darling of conspiracy theories claiming a cover-up of a crashed alien UFO. Evidence produced by the American military and Saudi intelligence all point to leader of al-Qaeda, bin Laden, being responsible for the attacks…

Travis Bratton, the man in charge of the NYTP, says that his tried and true methods are to thanks for the massive reduction in criminality in the city’s subways. With a mayoral election next year, there are some who believe that Travis Bratton is on the fast track to the police commissioner spot once the latter retires. Travis himself says he has no such lofty ambitions.

The FBI and NYPD are increasing cooperation to help combat crime in New York City and train detectives and agents on both sides of the equation. So far, however, the program has be met with heavy resistance within the FBI, despite the director’s keenness on carrying the program forward...

Goldsun Security signed a lucrative training and assistance deal with the Corrections Corporation of America to help train guards to work in Leavenworth, America’s first private maxsec prison.

Rumors are swirling that Asem & White Technologies will release a consumer PC sometime this year using Intel’s microprocessors. Analysts say, if true, this is another victory over copycat competitors that have gnawed at Intel’s market share the last year. Some of A&WT’s thunder was stolen when Peach Corporation announced that a new PC will hit markets later this year as well.
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PM will go out soon. Personal matters delayed the update longer than I wished. Note, as usual, most events and going-ons are not listed in the update. 95% of information will come in the PMs. If you do not receive a PM, it is because you did not send in orders last turn. Participants receive PMs.
 
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